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[Dwarfaholic]

Round 3:

((Okay, what's up with the rolls here? Everybody's just failing, and I can't demonstrate one of the rules that's technically been in play since the start.))

RAM: Utilize Sunglasses To Establish Dominance

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 3
Apparently Ancient Beings Of Power are not very impressed by Fashionable Behaviour.
You are Not Quite Certain Why You Thought It Would Work.

Mental Damage Roll: 1

Meh. People have done stupider things, Especially The Other Operatives. Mental Health 1/6. You Think You Should Right A Song About How You're Feeling.

Acanthus117: Lunatic Action

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 3
You wobble around Like A Duck.

New Rule Discovered! Only The First Action Of A Lunatic Is GM- Determined, Other Will Be Determined By Dice Roll
Sub-Rule Discovered! A 3 In A Lunatic Action Produces No Discernible Result

Kinseti: Lunatic Action

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 5
You do The Only Thing You Consider Worthwhile, and Shove Dirt Into Your Pockets. This apparently random act Soothes You Both Physically And Mentally.

Physical Heal Roll: 2
Physical Health 6/6. You feel The Scratch-Marks On Your Belly Hurt Less.

Mental Heal Roll: 4
Mental Health 4/6. Ah, Sweet Sanity. Why did you ever leave that blessed state?

Sub-Rule Discovered! A 5 In A Lunatic Roll Will Heal Both Physically And Mentally

Tarran: Produce Weapon

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 1
Weh-pon? What is that? Is it You Can Eat? You're Pretty Sure It Is, And Notice You Are Hungry.
Hey, look, A Weapon!

Physical Damage Roll: 1
Stick Physical Damage Roll: 4

The Long And Pointy Metal Stick Shatters in your mouth as you Remove It From Acanthus' Stomach And Attempt To Eat It. You spit out the fragments before they hurt your mouth too much, though. You're not really sure why you tried to do that. Physical Health 5/6.

Mental Damage Roll: 6
Mental Health 0/6. Your Mother Was Right: You Are A Failure. You Burst Into Tears And Jump Under The Dropship.

Physical Damage Roll: 2
The Dropship manages to dodge your attack, and Absconds. You hurt yourself a bit against the ground, though. Physical Health 3/6.

New Rule Discovered! Seriously, only one action per turn, people.

Vlynndar: Attack Invisible Beast

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 1
Apparently Closing Your Eyes Does Not Make You See Better. Just The Opposite. You Bang Your Nose on the Surprisingly Durable Tumbleweed Gun.

Physical Damage Roll: 5
Tumbleweed Gun Physical Damage Roll: 2

Physical Health 1/6. Tumbleweed Gun Physical Health 4/6. Ow! That Was Your Favourite Nose! Anger and humiliation accompany you as You Drop To The Ground, In Pain.

Mental Damage Roll: 3
Mental Health 1/6. Maybe You Should Create An RtD Game. Those Are Always Popular.

Achievement Unlocked! "The Edge"
Get both stats to 1

Kagus: Arrive

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 2
Pods are Surprisingly Difficult To Navigate While Emotionally Broken. You feel the impact with the ground pretty hard as The Pod Lands, Hitting Nothing.

Physical Damage Roll: 2
Physical Health 4/6. Luckily you're Not Too Hurt.

Mental Damage Roll: 5
Mental Health -4/6. WAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRBBBLLLGARRBBLE. THE KING OF HAND CREAMS HAS SENT YOU HERE, AND THE POD IS THE THRONE OF THE GOBLIN EMPEROR. DESTROY ALL UNBELIEVERS.

Target Choice: 5: Acanthus117

Acanthus117 strikes you as the Most Obvious Heretic. You Attack Him With Your Fists And Spittle.

Attack Roll: 4
Dodge Roll: Autofail [1]
Damage Roll: 3

You Flail At The Downed Person, And Your Spittle Gives Him Blood Poisoning. Acanthus Hasn't Even The Time To Be Surprised, And Perishes.

Killcount +1!

New Rule Discovered! Combat Rolls Will Be Determined By Physical Health. A Failed Dodge Will Result In Taking Damage

Achievement Unlocked! "Not Very Friendly"
Kill another operative

Achievement Unlocked! "Instakill"
Kill an enemy in one turn

Achievement Unlocked! "Too Fast, Too Furious"
Kill an enemy on the turn of your arrival

Reward Earned! List Of Discovered Rules And Sub-Rules

Events in The Waiting Room:
Doomshifter: Lunatic Action

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 4
Y'know, maybe Life Isn't That Bad after all. Crappy things happen to people, sure, but isn't there always Love?

Mental Heal Roll: 3

Mental Health 3/6. You suppose You Could Go Insane A Bit Later.

Sub-Rule Discovered! A 4 In A Lunatic Roll Will Heal Mentally

Paranatural: Chillax

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 1
Chillax? Chillax? RAAAAAAAAGGGGGGEEEEEEE. You Go Apeshit.

Physical Damage Roll: 5

Physical Health 1/6. You Crumple Up And Fall Over as you Break Your Own Legs.

Mental Damage Roll: 2

Mental Health 1/6. Oh man, You Gotta Try To Keep It Together, Man. Else They'll Getcha.

Status Update! Broken Leg: Walking or running Cause Physical Damage

Dragnar: No Action

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 2
You Hum Off-Note, and Suddenly Realize you Hate Octopi.

Mental Damage Roll: 1

Mental Health 5/6. Well, you suppose Octopi Aren't That Bad. But still.

Frelock II: No Action

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Result: 2
You Try To Take Up Accordion Playing, but realize The Accordion is A Lie.

Mental Damage Roll: 4

Mental Health 2/6. Why is Everything A Lie? Seriously Pisses You Off, It Does.

Main post update incoming, don't worry. Also, yeah, I notice I shouldn't have given Doomshifter a lunatic roll, but tbh, who cares?

[Acanthus117]

Yay! I died!

 

[Kagus]

Yay! I died!

 

Whoopsies.  Guess I forgot to brush my teeth before taking off to rock the Commies.


I find it very interesting that we're all turning into full-fledged lunatics when we're supposed to be destroying a moon base.

[Frelock]

I'm sure once we figure out the rules of this place, we'll be a lot better off.

Talk to Paranatural about his problems, and attempt to sooth his troubled mental state

[Vlynndar]

...My mental and physical health are both 1/6. This is dangerous. Living on the edge.

Repair the tumbleweed gun. It's soothing.

(Also, it's fun to read the turns either as a narrator of a documentary of nature, or the narrator of POWERTHIRST.)

[RAM]

Shouldn't there be some sort of achievement for reducing both your health stats to 1 at once?

Realising that my lack of firepower is driving me insane, I build a giant scoped crossbow.

[Vlynndar]

Shouldn't there be some sort of achievement for reducing both your health stats to 1 at once?

Ooh yes, I agree

[Vlynndar]

(This needs a second post)

Vlynndar: Attack Invisible Beast

Result: 1
Apparently Closing Your Eyes Does Not Make You See Better. Just The Opposite. You Bang Your Nose on the Surprisingly Durable Tumbleweed Gun.

Physical Damage Roll: 5
Tumbleweed Gun Physical Damage Roll: 2

Physical Health 1/6. Tumbleweed Gun Physical Health 4/6. Ow! That Was Your Favourite Nose! Anger and humiliation accompany you as You Drop To The Ground, In Pain.

Mental Damage Roll: 3
Mental Health 1/6. Maybe You Should Create An RtD Game. Those Are Always Popular.

Okay.

[Paranatural]

I'm sure once we figure out the rules of this place, we'll be a lot better off.

Talk to Paranatural about his problems, and attempt to sooth his troubled mental state

Lie down on the therapists couch and go into detail about my childhood and my mother.

[Tarran]

Hmm, not sure what to do now.

Attempt to communicate with the invisible monster.

Let's hope I don't die.

[Doomshifter]

Go insane from lolcat deprivation. Believe that the moon is made out of cheese and attempt to devour it.

With psychic powers.

[Errol]

Join waiting list and shove like a maniac.

[Toaster]

I think I'll get in on this one- doesn't look like a long wait

In the waiting room, I work out to improve my health.

[Flagrarus]

I think I'll join the waiting room as well 

Find myself a gun inside the waiting room

[Jetsquirrel]

il join 2

In the waiting room i meditate to improve my mental ability's