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[Rolan7]

Quite an impressive waiting list!  Throw me on the end, please.
Really just posting to follow this excellent thread, having finished reading it, but I will gladly take my turn if the opportunity arises.

[Bardum Idith]

Attempt to disarm him.

grab: d6=4, evade: d6=4
You try to grab the demon's weapon, but he pulls it away and counters:
hit: d6-1+1=1, evade: d6=5
Lucky you!


hit: d6-1+1=3, evade: d6=2, dmg: d12+4=6
The marksdwarf finally hits and deals 1 point of damage!

hit: d6+1=5, evade: d6=1, dmg: 1d12+5=11
Just like the speardwarf, who stabs the blasphemy's groin for 2 damage!

hit: d6-1+2=3, evade: d6=3
But the axedwarf fails to finish the demon off.

>_

In my typically soapy manner shout out "SOAP! FOOD! DRINK!" To state I am hungry and thirsty.

You state your needs but get nothing but suspicious glances. Guess this is a self-service meeting hall.
The formerly drinking guard draws his weapon...

>_

>Demand that I be allowed to open a portal to dark dimensions without thought or care for the quinsequonces.

"You dare to waste my time with such trivialities?!"
Ngug seems not to be very pleased...

He points one of his arms at your homieunculus and grins spitefully as it explodes in gore!

>_

Initiate Project Madness: Use the rusty iron whip, with it's cutting damage, to sharpen my elk bird horn.

Once that's done, head down the passage I didn't get chased by a devourer down. The one that beardless cur fled to.

bonecarving-check(>4): d6=3
You hit the horn with your iron whip:
You craft a fragile elk bird horn!


You arrive at a room litten with a sourceless blue light. There is an opened book lying on a pedestal.
The other dwarf and a six-armed demon are standing here. The floor is stained with blood.

>_


Status:

Spoiler: Ficeri (click to show/hide)

HP: 3/10

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 3
 (5-4) Upper Body: 5
 (3) Lower Body:3
 (2) Arms: 4
 (1) Legs: 4

Equipment
 worn phantom spider silk dress (equipped)

Spoiler: Unholy Guard (click to show/hide)

HP: 1/10

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 4
 (5-4) Upper Body: 6
 (3) Lower Body:4
 (2) Arms: 5
 (1) Legs: 5

Attacks
 Punch: hit+0, 1d12 dmg
 Clownite Scythe: hit-1, 3d10 dmg

Spoiler: Ngug (click to show/hide)

HP: 15

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 3
 (5-4) Upper Body: 5
 (3) Lower Body:3
 (2) Arms: 4
 (1) Legs: 4

Attacks
 ??

Spoiler: Iron Boatbucket (click to show/hide)

HP: 7/10
Skills:
 Competent Fish Cleaner (+1.5)
 Novice Striker (+0.5)
 Novice Herbalist (+0.5)
 Novice Cook (+0.5)
 Novice Animal Trainer (+0.5)
 Novice Dodger (+0.5)

Inventory
 wooden spear: hit+1, 1d12+3 dmg (equipped)
 fragile elk bird horn: hit-1, 2d8 dmg (equipped)
 leather armor (equipped)
 pig tail robe
 1 ration of plump helmet stew
 marble figurine of a piece of gore
 rusty iron whip: hit+0, 2d6-1 dmg

Spoiler: Bubbles "Mc"Warhead (click to show/hide)

HP: 3/10
Skills:
 Proficient Soap Maker (+2.5)
 Adequate Wizard (+1.0)
 Novice Dodger (+0.5)
 
Inventory
 balanced spinal cord: hit+0, 1d20-4 dmg (equipped)
 pig tail robe of the soapmakers' guild (equipped)
 Isethònul Bistökzuntîr
 2 rotten puppy ears
 branch: hit-1, 1d12 dmg
 1 piece of soap
 stange old paper

Spoiler: Urist Barrelburns (click to show/hide)

HP: 8/10
Skills:
Proficient Soap Maker (+2.5)

Inventory
 stone of gabbro (hauled)
 dirty pig tail robe of the soapmakers' guild (equipped)
 rusty knife: hit-1, 1d6+1 dmg

Spoiler: Urdim Milkman (click to show/hide)

HP: 6/10
Skills:
Competent Milker (+1.5)

Inventory
 pig tail robe (equipped)
 generic rock: hit-1, 1d8+2 dmg

[dwarfguy2]

Punch demon in snout to establish victory.

[Ultimuh]

I'll grab some food and drink while keeping my distance from the guards, those weapons looks dangerous.
Then proceed to eat/drink on the spot untill I have satiated my needs.

[IronyOwl]

Say hello to the nice demon.

[Doret]

Nuke should have sacrificed Homieunculus to Ngug to create a contract to increase his magicalness.
Not that I have anything more important to say, like I want to be on the waiting list.

[NUKE9.13]

>Be in awe

[Bardum Idith]

Punch demon in snout to establish victory.

hit: d6=3, evade: d6=2, damage: d8=6
You barely manage to punch the gruesome demon to death!
Its dark soul explodes in a burst of magical energy. Or something like that...

"Haha, good strike, lad!"

>_

I'll grab some food and drink while keeping my distance from the guards, those weapons looks dangerous.
Then proceed to eat/drink on the spot untill I have satiated my needs.

OMNOMNOM!
You eat a ration of cow meat and drink some dwarven wine. You feel satiated.
Some of the other dwarves still look at you in bewilderment.

>_

Say hello to the nice demon.

>Be in awe

Iron greets Ngug the nice demon while Bubbles is in awe. And dirty.

"Bah, puny mortals! Tell me one good reason not to mangle your bodies and flay your souls! You already wasted too much of my precious time..."

>_


Status:

Spoiler: Ficeri (click to show/hide)

HP: 3/10

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 3
 (5-4) Upper Body: 5
 (3) Lower Body:3
 (2) Arms: 4
 (1) Legs: 4

Equipment
 worn phantom spider silk dress (equipped)

Spoiler: Unholy Guard (click to show/hide)

HP: It's dead, Jim

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 4
 (5-4) Upper Body: 6
 (3) Lower Body:4
 (2) Arms: 5
 (1) Legs: 5

Attacks
 Punch: hit+0, 1d12 dmg
 Clownite Scythe: hit-1, 3d10 dmg

Spoiler: Ngug (click to show/hide)

HP: 15

Natural Armor:
 (6) Head: 3
 (5-4) Upper Body: 5
 (3) Lower Body:3
 (2) Arms: 4
 (1) Legs: 4

Attacks
 ??

Spoiler: Iron Boatbucket (click to show/hide)

HP: 7/10
Skills:
 Competent Fish Cleaner (+1.5)
 Novice Striker (+0.5)
 Novice Herbalist (+0.5)
 Novice Cook (+0.5)
 Novice Animal Trainer (+0.5)
 Novice Dodger (+0.5)

Inventory
 wooden spear: hit+1, 1d12+3 dmg (equipped)
 fragile elk bird horn: hit-1, 2d8 dmg (equipped)
 leather armor (equipped)
 pig tail robe
 1 ration of plump helmet stew
 marble figurine of awe
 rusty iron whip: hit+0, 2d6-1 dmg

Spoiler: Bubbles "Mc"Warhead (click to show/hide)

HP: 3/10
Skills:
 Proficient Soap Maker (+2.5)
 Adequate Wizard (+1.0)
 Novice Dodger (+0.5)
 
Inventory
 balanced spinal cord: hit+0, 1d20-4 dmg (equipped)
 pig tail robe of the soapmakers' guild (equipped)
 Isethònul Bistökzuntîr
 2 rotten puppy ears
 branch: hit-1, 1d12 dmg
 1 piece of soap
 stange old paper

Spoiler: Urist Barrelburns (click to show/hide)

HP: 8/10
Skills:
Proficient Soap Maker (+2.5)

Inventory
 stone of gabbro (hauled)
 dirty pig tail robe of the soapmakers' guild (equipped)
 rusty knife: hit-1, 1d6+1 dmg

Spoiler: Urdim Milkman (click to show/hide)

HP: 6/10
Skills:
Competent Milker (+1.5)

Inventory
 pig tail robe (equipped)
 generic rock: hit-1, 1d8+2 dmg

[dwarfguy2]

"Thanks. Let's hurry, there may be more of them. Also, does this fortress have a megabeast zoo or anything?"

Edit: after taking the scythe.

[NUKE9.13]

Of course. My apologies for wasting your time.
I will get down to business.
>Demand an autograph.

[Ultimuh]

Now that I have had my fill, I will follow my soapy instincts to fond some materials for soap!

[Siquo]

Nooooooo she missed Nuke! Not poor Homie!

[IronyOwl]

Point out that mangling our bodies would take even more time. Inquire what he would have been doing with his time instead.

[Samthere]

I know I'm a little late but I wanted to pay my respects.

[Sheb]

Wasn't I on the waiting list?


BTW, could you please die faster? Thanks.