Da Polan'd - a Country Supreme at it's very centre of Da Europe, no lies!
Un magnifique un geographique et la historique la lesson:
Polando Superbo Republico, iz a mighty country of powerful warriorz! Behold their warlike spirit, as they duke it out after football(aka soccer) matches!
Them Poles be descendants of mighty Sarmatians of Sarmatia, who made Roman sissy boys cry! Just try playing Centurion on the highest difficulty setting and you'll see for yourself!
The motherland of Poles is however in dire peril since ancient times: the evil das Nazi empire on the west wants to invade us and retake their old houses in Festung Breslau, Danzing and assorted cities. To this very purpose they invented the evil beurocratic behemoth called EU!
But that's not all! From the North-East, hundreds of tanks of the Soviet, now disguised as Russian Federation await command to roll onto Polish plains and make the Russian language compulsory in schools again.
Also from the N-E, the evil Lithuanian separatists plot our downfall.
From the East, the pseudo-independent-while-covertly-russian-puppets of Ukraine and Belarus are planting illegal immigrants from Asia onto our soil, so that the mighty Polish blood would thin and falter.
From the North, the cold waves of Baltic Sea make our beaches shitty.
And finally, from the South...
...actually there's awesome and cheap beer in Czech Republic as well as in Slovakia. And the girls are sweet too!
edit: waaait, they probably hold a grudge against us for that invasion in 1968. And that border disputes before the IIWW. Must be up to no good.