Dragnar: Construct Additional Pylons.
Frelock: Fix typoman's neck. Then go talk to the royal couple.
Tehstefan: Greet them, without violence.
Typoman: i activate a transformation sequence on myself
Inteuniso: Tell him our mission and ask for basic plot who he is exactly.
ExKirby(GM'd): Look around.
Sensei(GM'd): Look around.
Dragnar: 5-2=3
Manging to halt the malicious pi-calculating program, you attempt to pylon it up. Some residual energy from Typoman's transformation attempt enhances the memetic aspect of the action, and you end up with a fully operational pylon.
What the hell does a pylon do anyway?
Frelock: 1+failguard=2
You remain comfortably unconcious.
Tehstefan: 5
You approach the orange-robed man.
Typoman: 6
Feeling quite weak from your broken neck, you call upon the strongest memetic power flows from the deepest and darkest pits of the internet.
Your body is ripped apart by tremendous, dark forces. You feel incredible hate flow through your mind. Just as you feel that you are about to be consumed by darkness, something steps in and shuts off the power flows.
"Screwing with energy flows like that is a dumb idea even when you know what you're doing as well as I do- and I've been around for a pretty long time."
You recognise the voice as the voice of the man who was talking to Colonel Jameson in the TOAST Military center.
"A word from the wise: I suggest you find safer sources of power if you're doing to do that again. You should probably gain a little more experience before you do. Even the more passive energy flows can vaporize you if you get a little too much."
"Oh, and I suggest you avoid yellow vans from now on."
Your neck injury has healed.
Inteuniso: 5
You join the captain in chatting with the orange-robed man.
ExKirby+
Sensei: 6&1
You begin to walk around the castle. It is ridiculously large. Closets stuffed with food are everywhere. Every room seems to be just about the same, walls painted red and gold lief everywhere, most rooms containing a balcony. It's quite disorienting. In fact, you seem to be lost...
Frelock: Wristwatch, computer terminal, glasses, civilian clothes, pamphlet, a jewel-encrusted egg, a bag which contains a lunch and a clove of garlic, and a bottle of water. In the storeroom.
Proficient in modifying, and synthesizing with hacking tools. (+2 to modification and +1 to synthesis at short range)
Advanced in healing (+2, can use on two targets in one turn)
Implants:
REMOTE VIEWING 3
SENSOR 3
HIDDEN ENTITY DETECTOR 2
TACTICAL SCANNER 2
ADV. DATA INT. 2
Inteuniso: Tau armor, elfin sword, quantum storage full of scrap, engineering computer (will give bonus to engineering tasks once you work with it a little bit), Lance, carrots and apples, longsword. In the storeroom.
Dabbling swordsmanship.
Dabbling dancing.
Dabbling horsemanship.
Novice Hauler (+1 to carrying stuff around)
Novice Mechanic (+1 to working with vehicles)
Cheif Engineer of the Starship Jefferson (+1 to working with the Ultravan)
Implants:
AIM 5
REMOTE VIEWING 3
TI STD MIL. IMPLANT 5
TI TACTICAL+ 5
Pet horse (currently mounted)
Tehstefan: .44 Magnum, Fedora, bullwhip, touchstone, tinning kit, Amulet of Yendor. Location: In storeroom.
Agile (+1 to running and jumping).
Novice driver(+1 to operating vehicles)
Novice telekeinesis-user (+2 to using telekinesis implant)
Novice Mechanic (+1 to working with vehicles)
Captain of the Starship Jefferson (+1 to doing anything with the Jefferson, additional +1 to navigating in particular)
Implants:
TI AIM 5
TI TACTICAL+ 5
TI SENSOR 3
TI FLIGHT 4
TI TELEKINESIS 5
TI REFLEX 3
Intrinsics:
Warning
ExKirby: Red Helmet, Red Army Gear, Combat Knife, .9mm Pistol, StA52 Assault Rifle, Forcer Grapple, beam sword, Meaningless Commander's Badge, two-handed broadsword, oil lamp. Location: Storeroom.
Enhanced enhanced bone structure (+3 to blunt and crushing damage avoid) Hardened flesh (+2 to burning and projectile damage avoid)
Turret Control (+1 to manually controlling ship-mounted weaponry)
AUTOMEDICAL 2
AIM 5
FLIGHT 4
REFLEX 3
INTANGIBILITY 5
CLOAK 4
Blessing of Ordo (Relaxed laws of physics, +1 to attacking chaotic beings)
In command of 5 little robot minions:
Lost
Sawbuck: A flying robot, with a multitude of extremely sharp blades. It deals heavy slashing damage. However, it is unstable and a decent impact will send it far away.
Clanger: A small, heavy, tank-like robot, with a pair of heavy duty hydraulic pincers on its front. It deals heavy crushing damage(+1). It is highly resistant to damage, but very slow.
Zip: A small, extremely fast wheeled robot. It attacks by discharging electrical energy into its target, dealing light burn damage. It can move at extreme speed, and carry light cargo.
Bash: A mid-size, doglike robot with extremely powerful back legs. It can fling itself long distances with them. It jumps on enemies, knocking them down and dealing moderate blunt impact damage.
Sensei: Knife, suitcase O' spectacles, electric brass lantern, two lengths of rope, uranium battleaxe (+1 enemy dodge, +1 damage), basic construction equipment, Nano-EAGLE, big missile launcher, 1000 gold pieces, a tin operner, a credit card, an expensive camera, hawaiian shirt. In storeroom.
Implants:
SENSOR 3
FLIGHT 4
HIDDEN ENTITY DETECTOR 2
REMOTE VIEWING 3
AIM 3
REFLEX 3
Novice builder: +1 to building stuff
Practiced aim(+1 to aiming)
Glowing(-1 to being sneaky while on).
Lost
Qwertyuiopas: Computer-goggles, scriptgun(loaded with gravity modifier), gloves, 6 fortune cookies. In storeroom.
Implants:
REMOTE VIEWING 3
HIDDEN ENTITY DETECTOR 2
Chief Science Officer (+2 to using the Ultravan's sensors and computer systems, as well as generally scienceing)
Available Scripts:
Colorer
Gravity Modifier
Computer Stopper
Projectile Shield
Macguffin Detector
Dragnar: Built-in laser pistol, mining tools(+1 enhancement for mining, negates 1 armor when used as weapon), quantum storage full of scrap, portable bunker(hold it for a +2 to avoid damage, or plant it in the ground and create an impenetrable barrier to all projectiles coming from that direction.), coasters, cattle prod, unidentified floppies. Location: In Storeroom.
Calculating Pi (-2 to all actions)
Implants:
TI FLIGHT 4
TI HIDDEN ENTITY DETECTOR 2
TI CLOAK 4
TI ADV. DATA INT. 2
TI ITEM MAGNET 3
TI STASIS 3
Novice flier: +1 to flight with flight implant
Enhanced Speed (+1 to reflexes and high-speed actions)
Encumbering Repair Devices (Heals 50% of incurred damage every turn, -1 to dexterous actions)
Can Fly, rockets in feet.
Typoman: hammer pants and polo, with a funky pen in the breast pocket. a shield made of pure, solid rage, a robe, an small shield, a mace, and a clove of garlic, and an SDW-120.
TI FLIGHT 4
TI SENSOR 3
TI AUTOMEDICAL 2
TI TACTICAL SCANNER
TI CLOAK 4
TI REMOTE VIEWING
Involuntarily absorbs organic matter and reprocesses it.
Abilities:
Exploding Van:
Kill It With Fire:
Stains Stare:
Lv. 1 Summon Memetic: Call one low-level memetic being to your aid.
Starship Jefferson:
A TOAST Industries Ultravan with:
Flight package (+VTOL enhancement),4 "KICKASS" kinetic weapons, 2 "nano-EAGLEs" on turrets, one pulse rifle on a turret, two "Phasers", two "laser machine guns", one tractor beam, two "Ageis V3s", an "energy deflector shield", three VSP-grade hyperdrives (only one can function at a time), a "TI Standard Rangercam+scanner" with a "VSP Rangercam Upgrade", a "TI Advanced Navigation/targeting system", an inertial compensator, an "all in one life-support system", a "super communicator module", a remote environmental probe (with two nano-EAGLE turrets), a void entry device, an implant installation upgrade, a TOAST construction computer, a healing turret, a TOAST weapons dispenser, a transporter, an Advanced Auto-Repair Unit, 2 Large Wall-Mount Quantum Storage Devices, a special 360 degree super-voidscanner designed by Qwertyuiopas.
Transforming mecha fighter attached to bottom of ship. Can now detach in the void, but has no voidscanner.
Contains:
12 Portable Temporary Auto-Repair Devices
AI called Slick. Looking worriedly at Typoman.
Maintainance+Medical droid. Attempting to revive Frelock: 3. Frelock wakes up.
NUKM drone. Appreciating the spectacle of destruction before him.
Much miscellaneous scrap.
Text:
"I am captian Tehstefan of the starship Jefferson. Who are you?"
"I'm the king. King Harkinan. Where's my f***'in dinner..."
King Harkinian pours himself a bowl of Munf Munf. The Munf Munf box has a picture of the King on the front.
"We're on a mission to destroy the corruption that threatens our universe."
"I heard about it. Duke Onkled in Gamelon is under attack by it. I was going to aid him. My ship sails in the morning."
"But it is morning."
"Yes."
(this means that you can board the ship right now)