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[Phantom]

Savescum.

[Jackrabbit]

You shake some Valium from its bottle. Three hit the floor, and you scrabble for them, shove them in your mouth, grab your cashier's standard water bottle and gulp down. You wait a moment, and then feel a sense of peace come down upon you. There's still a problem of the angry helldemons outside, but you suddenly feel like you can deal with that. Luckily, at this point the manager hits the panic button and sheets of metal come crashing down in front of the windows. Panicked people crush up against the metal, desperate to get out. You quickly scrape some scum out from under the register and place it in your pocket. Okay. Okay, you can do this. Even through the warm haze, you can feel the dark worm of panic wriggling there, somewhere. No, you can do this.

What do you do?

Wearing:
Cashier's Apron
Sensible shirt
Stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($50)
Wrist Watch (8:34)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)

Left hand - water bottle

Mental State:
I think I can do this. I hope I can do this.

[Phantom]

Go bat shit.

[Criptfeind]

Go bat shit.

Don't you can do this. Look for a gun.

[Phantom]

Go bat shit.

Don't you can do this. Look for a gun.

Don't you can do this?

[Cheddarius]

Don't; you can do this.
I recommend that you inspect thy whereabouts for some type of implement with which to ensure your long-term survival, my dear sir.

[Lidhuin]

I do agree good sir, it would appear we work here, so naturally we would know where to best find said implement.

Might I suggest a rifle or pistol of some sort, or lacking that, a chainsaw? In the absolute worst case, we can always pick up a baseball bat.

This all-american supermarket does have a baseball bat, at least, right?

[Squeegy]

This is clever. I approve.

> Throw sensible shoes at monsters.

[webadict]

> Go to the bank to deposit money

[Phantom]

My good sir, may I introduce you to the pause menu.
Please press escape to start it, and load a previously saved game.

[Jackrabbit]

The Valium leaves you a little... fuzzy, but you think you can manage. The thought of going batshit occurs to you, but you decide to leave that as Plan C for now. What'll Plan A and B be? Well, there's a gunstore, but it's outside and besides, you've only really used guns on hunting trips. Still, getting there seems like a good ide - oh my goodness, the money, you almost forgot. That's what you need to do. If you keep putting it off, you'll just end up getting there at closing time, you Johnny-come-lately. You giggle a little bit through the Valium induced fog. This seems like a fantastic idea. But there are still monsters outside, and whilst the metal sheet seperating you and them doesn't sound like it's coming under attack, surely it will soon. You run to the sports aisle and grab a baseball bat, dropping your waterbottle. You were the best home run hitter on your team, back in your high school days. You're sure you can score a few... 'home runs' with this little darling. And by 'home runs' you mean 'cave in the skulls of the commutrist invaders' as they so clearly are. You should probably think of a name for it. Okay, now, to the bank. There are many, many ways out of the supermarket but all are blocked thanks to the panic button your boss hit. Hm.

What do you do?

Wearing:
Cashier's Apron
Sensible shirt
Stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($50)
Wrist Watch (8:35)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)

Wielding - Baseball bat (both hands) (proficient)

Mental state:
Having a little trouble thinking clearly... ha ha, man, home run, that was hilarious, I really should write this down

[Acanthus117]

Throw the scum at the panic screen and look for a back exit.

[Pandarsenic]

No, savescum.

It might be useful to blind something. Just keep it away from the valium and anything else going in our collective American mouth.

>Tell MANAGER "We are ready to FIGHT for TRUTH, JUSTICE, and the AMERICAN WAY."

[Enzo]

Name baseball bat Babe Ruthless.

[webadict]

> The manager is a commuquist. Eliminate him, so that all of your fellow Americans can enjoy freedom!