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[Jackrabbit]

You grab a few mushrooms out of the ground. You remember something about mushrooms from your time as a scout but... you're so hungry. You scoff them down. Urgh, maybe you should have fried them first. Heading to the bank is probably out of the question now, so you decide to find safe haven in this forest. You turn and head away from civilization, as columns of smoke mark fires that have broken out in and around your neighborhood. Maybe you'll find a tree fort! You once again think back to your time as a scout. Ahhh. What years those were.

Terror strikes you. You quickly check the bag but... no, the book's gone. Dashed into the mud nearly a mile behind you. Good. Good.

Man this wood is kinda dark. You've never been in here before. It's kinda spooky, actually. You'd best find a place to make camp. About ten minutes later, you discover a clearing with a brook to the north end. You take out your money but you don't have a means to bury it.

You have no idea where you are.

What do you do?

Left arm (deep scratch) (bandaged) (healing)

Wearing:
Mask of Sensibility
Even more stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($90)
Wrist Watch (9:37)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)
Colt 45 (0/0)
Babe Ruthless (PATRIOTIC) (proficient) (bayonet)
Backpack (5 clips - Thompson) (Rations - unAmerican)
Water bottle (full)

Wielding - Thompson (both hands) (average) (14/5)

Mental State:
I think I'm lost. No, okay, I am lost. Goddamn it.

[Enzo]

Embark on psilocybin-induced psychedelic spirit journey to find your center and ultimate truth.

[Jopax]

Hide the money in the brook, those filthy communists will never think to look there, also take a bath

[Jackrabbit]

You really need to get that damned book off your mind. It's gone, for good, and you shouldn't... oh woah... oh man do you feel groggy... the entire clearing starts to spin and you collapse onto the forest floor, totally out of it.

About five minutes later, a rabbit hops into the clearing and sits on your head. An eagle would have been... more... Americaaannnnnnn...

What do you do?

Wounded:
Left arm (deep scratch) (bandaged) (healing)
Severe reaction - mushrooms/Valium

Wearing:
Mask of Sensibility
Even more stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($90)
Wrist Watch (9:37)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)
Colt 45 (0/0)
Babe Ruthless (PATRIOTIC) (proficient) (bayonet)
Backpack (5 clips - Thompson) (Rations - unAmerican)
Water bottle (full)

Wielding - Thompson (both hands) (average) (14/5)

Mental State:
Hebledeblewerp...

[Criptfeind]

What is more American than raping the land for sustenance I ask you? NOTHING! Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

[Wimdit]

Yeah, you need some actual food rather than just Valium and hallucinogenic mushrooms. Since you were a scout, you should be able to live off the land even in a drug-induced haze.

[Virroken]

What is more American than raping the land for sustenance I ask you? NOTHING! Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Than start a fire.

start a fire.

[Acanthus117]

What is more American than raping the land for sustenance I ask you? NOTHING! Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Than start a fire.

start a fire.

WE DIDN'T START THE MOFO'ING FIRE

[Karnewarrior]

What is more American than raping the land for sustenance I ask you? NOTHING! Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Go hunt some tasty animals already. Than start a fire.

Than start a fire.

start a fire.

YES!

[Jackrabbit]

Raping is such a harsh term. You prefer 'taking from the land what was ours anyway because we're AMERICANS', but you digress. You groggily reach up for the rabbit, which jumps away from you and scampers out of the clearing. Damn it. You lift yourself to a sitting position and nearly topple over backwards. You spend the next ten minutes waiting for your head to clear, which it does, eventually. Standing up, you manage to locate enough wood to start a fire, but nothing to start it with. You manage to recall how to start a fire with two sticks and somehow manage to do so. Hey, you got a fire going! You're still starving. Those rations are starting to - no! No.

What do you do?

Wounded:
Left arm (deep scratch) (bandaged) (healing)
Severe reaction - mushrooms/Valium

Wearing:
Mask of Sensibility
Even more stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($90)
Wrist Watch (9:52)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)
Colt 45 (0/0)
Babe Ruthless (PATRIOTIC) (proficient) (bayonet)
Backpack (5 clips - Thompson) (Rations - unAmerican)
Water bottle (full)

Wielding - Thompson (both hands) (average) (14/5)

Mental State:
Ooooohoooooo....

[Criptfeind]

Work up a sweat.
Sweat on rations.
Eat AMERICAN rations.

[Pandarsenic]

Work up a sweat.
Sweat on rations.
Eat AMERICAN rations.

[Lidhuin]

Process rations further by cooking them.

Everyone knows that unprocessed food is unAmerican. Remove the un, and processed food becomes American!

[Nirur Torir]

Remember from our scouting lessons that surrounding the fire with non-porous rocks will greatly decrease the chance of us being in the middle of a forest fire fifteen minutes from now. Surround the fire with non-porous rocks.

[Jackrabbit]

Despite your current predicament you quickly surround the fire with non-porous rocks. Only you can prevent herlblederbledeep. Man, what was in those mushrooms? Then, you hit upon a fantastic idea!
Five minutes later, you've done enough dodgy push ups to work up a sweat. You take out a beef-stew bar (or a frozen shit bar, it's difficult to tell), rub it all over yourself and bite into FREEDOM.

Freedom tastes disgusting. But hey, that's the price you pay. You are no longer hungry, although you are a little... grossed out. There's about 4 bars of processed excrement remaining. You really don't feel like eating them.

What do you do?

Wounded:
Left arm (deep scratch) (bandaged) (healing)
Severe reaction - mushrooms/Valium

Wearing:
Mask of Sensibility
Even more stained but still sensible pants
Sensible shoes

Inventory:
Wallet ($90)
Wrist Watch (9:58)
Valium (too much)
Scum
Sock ($1000)
Colt 45 (0/0)
Babe Ruthless (PATRIOTIC) (proficient) (bayonet)
Backpack (5 clips - Thompson) (Rations - unAmerican (4))
Water bottle (full)

Wielding - Thompson (left hand - standing down) (average) (14/5)

Mental State:
Freedom tastes kinda salty.