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[blackmagechill]

It was someone unimportant in history.

[Haspen]

Started a new character to pick up on histories the last one missed; an adventurer-archeologist, if you will, so naturally he starts with a whip. I senselessly set history to hidden in a world this size, and set to cull unimportant history and hide caves, so I'll have to cheat to find the coords.

She left two burning questions in particular. The queen's husband; she talks about him as if he's still alive, but all traces of him stop at year 1. He settled down, married her, and knocked her up with a son in that year. I haven't found him in any village, and no one mentions him doing anything in surrounding areas. So where did he go?

She says her son married an 'unknown creature'. Is that any way to talk about your daughter-in-law? (presumably 'daughter', but since they didn't birth children, that can't be concluded.) The son is still alive, but in interviews on his family, he'll talk about anything but his wife. Are you ashamed of something, dude? What the hell 'unknown creature' did you wed?

Go on, and discover the truth behind...

The Mystery Of Dissappeared King!

And then it's sequel...

The Shameful Wife Of The Prince!

In theatres, 3rd September 2010

[Dok Enkephalin]

Right, one day I'll find the cave of the ettin who plundered the retreat at the time, and there'll be the wedding mementos. "A figurine of Vera Flamethunder consummating his union with an ass monster".

[OmnipotentGrue]

Going to watch The Mystery Of Dissappeared King! and The Shameful Wife Of The Prince! guys. Be back soon.

[Dok Enkephalin]

I watched a pack of naked mole dogs take down 5 giants. They would've gotten 7, but I showed up just in time to get credit for strangling them. Those mole dogs now have names that will live on in history, and one of them wasn't even a year old.

[iceball3]

Heh...
i just entered the 'Plains of Disemboweling'. The warlord in one of the towns wanted me to kill a minotaur known as 'The Greater Gut'.
...
 

[Confused111]

Ok, a world named The Planet of Dragons. I'm either gonna be a Human named Turin or an Elf named Fingolfin.

[Josephus]

I'd go with Fingolfin. If you go with the first choice you're going to have to commit unknowing incest at some point in your career, and then commit suicide.

[Acanthus117]

Hehe, my Minotaur Axeman, Squiggly, is having the time of his life laying waste to every single Dwarf, Human, Elf, Goblin and Kobold that he can find.

I've managed to wipe out three of the four human civilizations, all the Kobolds, all the Elves, and all but one Fortress of Dwarves.

When the Age of Death begins, I'll just throw him off a tower into a magma pool (got plenty of those in half-finished forts) and regen.

I love causing mass genocide on a worldly scale!

[Rumrusher]

Hehe, my Minotaur Axeman, Squiggly, is having the time of his life laying waste to every single Dwarf, Human, Elf, Goblin and Kobold that he can find.

I've managed to wipe out three of the four human civilizations, all the Kobolds, all the Elves, and all but one Fortress of Dwarves.

When the Age of Death begins, I'll just throw him off a tower into a magma pool (got plenty of those in half-finished forts) and regen.

I love causing mass genocide on a worldly scale!

nah try body swap retire(which is pretty much kill your self in a different body.) then go back as a different adventurer to challenge the bringer of death after you free him from his Cage!
at least then the minotaur would heroically murdered than pulling the terminator suicide.
though you have to at least retire him get a cagetrap built in some awesome final resting place where the walls are engraved with all of the minotaur history(build a wall over those which don't talk about your epic adventurer and make them redo it.) Then somehow Recruit the epic beast and then toss him into the cage trap sealing him.

how you do that well you could starve your minotaur touring guide leaving him there in the place and hopefully when you get back there in fort mode he still be there so you can attempt to cage him and rig a lever that release him.

[Kaeoz Crimson]

Alright, this is too weird not to mention: I played an elf swordsman, and got into my first battle: A Sasquatch.  My elf is striking swiftly, dodging nimbly, and all in all making the Sasquatch look like an increasingly retarded fat kid trying to catch a rabbit, and the rabbit was armed with a switchblade.  Within five minutes, the Sasquatch was crippled.  Five more, and Sassy could no longer sustain consciousness (He'd wake up only to immediately pass out) and just kept bleeding and vomiting all over itself.  My elf had to sit down and rest several times, but after fifteen minutes of sustained Meatgodding, the Sasquatch finally bled to death.  Drunk with my first glorious victory, I saw a nearby deer and thought, "Sure, let's have venison for supper." I went at it, struck it's lower body, bruising the fat, and then the deer attacked me: It kicked me in the head, shattering the skull and tearing the brain.  After having brutally beat a Sasquatch to death with no real difficulty, a deer killed this elf in a single blow.  There is a natural order to things, and I now under stand where Deer, Sasquatch and Elves stand in that order.
From mightiest to weakest:
Deer
Elf
Sasquatch
...
Potential future modding project: Battle Deer, with adamantine antlers and hooves, and can wear armor.  That'll be something to strike fear into those pansy elves XD.

[Josephus]

It's nice to see that Meatgod is now a proper verb as well it should be.

Also? Never mess with ungulates. They will murder you and eat your spleen for fun. You think deer are bad? Try horses.

[Acanthus117]

The real menace?

elven drunks.

I swear to god, I've been punched out by these bastards too many times to count. D:

[Knigel]

Went on a quest to kill a hydra as a human bo(wo)man accompanied by a bowman/wrestler, but fled from battle after running out of arrows and companion died (but before taking any damage). Went to another town, recruited a hammerman, and went back to find hydra. Couldn't find it ended up separated from hammerman and dicking around in a really deep cave (you can't take minerals out of falls in Adventurer Mode, can you?), came out and reunited with hammerman. Found out hydra was dead, as it either bleed to death from its wounds (several to its heads) or was finished off by hammerman (the wiki is right about those being stupidly easy to kill).

Went back to town to report the hydra's defeated, after a minor skirmish with some wolves (hammerman kicked ass) I got there and BOOM-- town was overrun by horses, buzzards, and rhesus macaques. Helped a 7 year old girl kill some of the later (she was doing pretty well at wrestling them on her own, especially since they couldn't get any attacks through her clothes) and am currently hoping the warlord that assigned me this quest isn't dead.

[Kobold Troubadour]

@Knigel: Huh. Mmm...well according to the Cliche' Tropes 101, now you've got to take the young girl under your wing and bring her with you in your travels while training her cuz' the animal attacks are but the 1st sign of impending doom. For soon a great calamity will fall upon the land and she will be the chosen one that will bring forth order.

...yes, your role is the old mentor who would probably die in a bad-ass battle royale with the big bad that will give her motivation to fight the good fight 'till the end. Sooo...yay?

--------------------

OnTopic: Was wandering the mountains...saw goats and decided to hurt 'em with splinters via wooden sword. But found an extra target nowhere to be found...


Yep...a Mite Fiend. Was it attached to one of the mountain goats? I scared them away but it was still there...was it underground? I could hurt it but it was nowhere in "sight" and it never fought back. Maybe it was so small that it didn't even have a icon to represent it...weird.

I couldn't kill it because I was using a frickin' sword shaped wooden stick, I guess it was amused by the Elf trying so hard to vanquish it. I can imagine this small demonic Mite with a deep, dark, evil voice taunting me expecting me to be scared or something...