Hmmm... first off, I think I totally fell in love with the human vampire chick after I finally tracked down first the entrance to the catacombs, and then tracked her down inside of them... I find an axe lord standing there.. kay, gonna sneak up and stab her in the head then.
She dodges, we trade a few blows and circle a bit, then I manage to get her to drop her shield, while she gashes up my leg, dropping me to the ground, I roll away and stab her foot quickly enough to get a little bit of breathing room, and then we spend a good twenty or so exchanges dodging and parrying and poking and slashing and hacking at each other while crawling around a 2x1 column about 1 square from the bottom end of a long 4 tile wide room, the floors, the walls, everything is soaked with gore (I probably should have tried to drink it earlier and vamp up but I forgot for a while as I was just focused on keeping her from sticking that battle axe in me again), I finally got her weapon hand and after that point she was reduced to trying to bite me while I still had my shield, and I finally got my spear stuck inside of her skull, ending the gruesome ballet we painted the walls with.
I wish I had grabbed a SS but I was faint and bleeding despite drinking her blood so I slept real quick to close the wounds which cleaned the gore up sadly, but I still butchered her body, and then I grabbed her axe, skin, bones, skull, and heart. I left the bones and skin to either side of her axe in my mead hall, with the heart sitting on top of her axe, the skull I keep with me in my backpack, as a reminder of where the massive scar on my leg, and my newfound powers both came from.
While running around doing a bit of rampaging I found a campsite of elf refugees... and I guess this is why elves sleep in trees, they are shit at building placement:
I was like "huh, you guys look like you didn't plan this out well, how are you feeling? what do you think of me? did you know I killed your guards on the shore?" they were like "oh you jerk-glubglubglub" and drowned... ah well.
Then I discovered a fun new game that comes with being able to sprint constantly without tiring:
"Hey batta-batta-batta-sah-wing batta!"
"HE KNOCKS IT OUT OF THE PARK!"
*sees someone near a shoreline*
Hee hee hee...