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[Ascimator]

I explore the keep, on that 1-wide ledge. My bowman sidekick, who is already wounded, rushes right in the door and three kobolds beat the shit out of him. I shoot some bolts at them from sneaking and then somehow they cross 4 tiles, spot me and make me dodge down the ledge head-first all in one frame.
The Kobold Swordsman jumps away from The flying silver bolt!
You've been spotted! 2x
The Kobold Swordsman attacks You but You jump away!
You slam into an obstacle!
Your head takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle, jamming the skull through the brain and tearing apart the brain!
You have died after colliding with an obstacle.

[luppolo]

i was praticing wrestling on locals in the starting hamlet, when i finished all them and went inside a house to rest and heal wounds i realized i didn't "clear" that very house so i got ganged by a dozen of peasants and died

also discovered that my adventurer became a dabbling Miller during the fights! maybe that's because all those crushed thumbs?

[Gizogin]

I finally figured out that waterskins work as flasks, so I made a couple portions of escape potion to heal myself (the escape transformation is really a transformation potion that also grants superspeed).  Now I'm back to full use of my limbs, and I just became a vampromancer.

[Mobotium]

I was walking around in my new-genned world, 867 years of history, when I found a human city which looked completely deserted. Eventualy, among the numerous abandoned shops and houses, I found a single habitated cloth shop, inside were 2 men, this is an excert of my conversation with one of them:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

!!!

The other one is probably a vampire, he says hes been a ranger for "all 134 years" of his life...

[Megaman_zx]

maybe they're both vampires... two immortals living together in the ruins of their birthplace.

[Mobotium]

Its a possibility to consider, yes.

//EDIT//

Legends agree with you, aparently shes lived for over 300 years and has killed 3382 sentients 
I want her in my military!

[MadocComadrin]

That, or he's stalking the last person in the town after killing everyone else off, and that 134 year old ranger is just the un/lucky last victim.

[Guuo]

This game hates me. My character was a legendary wrestler, dodger, striker, kicker, fighter and ambusher among other things. I sneaked up to a spearman, hoping to strangle him unnoticed. Nope, not against these bandits. I promptly took hold of the spearmans throat with my right hand unnoticed, only to feel The Force strong in him as I adjusted my grip around his throat AS A LEGENDARY WRESTLER AGAINST A BANDIT.

Failing to apply a chokehold on him, I decided to break stealth and just beat him up the old way.
After a couple of measly punches and a few more attempts to squeeze the spearman out of breath, he thought it was time to "show this LEGENDARY DWARVEN WARRIOR puny elfling who's boss around here". With ease, the spearman knocked me over and, due to me grabbing his silver spear earlier, punched me silly. I attempted to take control of his spear and impale him on it, but this plan was scrapped the second my LEGENDARY WRESTLER failed to gain possession of the spear. Fortunately I managed to kick him in the foot, breaking his ankle. I got a lucky shot at his head, breaking his spine. I proceeded to tear him up with his spear. I left him there, bleeding.

Looking around, I saw the bandit axeman approaching from the north. Thinking the spearman must have been some kind of embodiment of Armok, I was getting a bit worried.

I engaged the axeman. I grabbed his left hand with a swift joint lock in mind. After having to ADJUST MY GRIP a few times, the axeman stopped laughing and knocked me over, severing my left foot, hacking me in the head and killing me.

myfacewhen.jpg

[Broseph Stalin]

This game hates me. My character was a legendary wrestler, dodger, striker, kicker, fighter and ambusher among other things. I sneaked up to a spearman, hoping to strangle him unnoticed. Nope, not against these bandits. I promptly took hold of the spearmans throat with my right hand unnoticed, only to feel The Force strong in him as I adjusted my grip around his throat AS A LEGENDARY WRESTLER AGAINST A BANDIT.

Failing to apply a chokehold on him, I decided to break stealth and just beat him up the old way.
After a couple of measly punches and a few more attempts to squeeze the spearman out of breath, he thought it was time to "show this LEGENDARY DWARVEN WARRIOR puny elfling who's boss around here". With ease, the spearman knocked me over and, due to me grabbing his silver spear earlier, punched me silly. I attempted to take control of his spear and impale him on it, but this plan was scrapped the second my LEGENDARY WRESTLER failed to gain possession of the spear. Fortunately I managed to kick him in the foot, breaking his ankle. I got a lucky shot at his head, breaking his spine. I proceeded to tear him up with his spear. I left him there, bleeding.

Looking around, I saw the bandit axeman approaching from the north. Thinking the spearman must have been some kind of embodiment of Armok, I was getting a bit worried.

I engaged the axeman. I grabbed his left hand with a swift joint lock in mind. After having to ADJUST MY GRIP a few times, the axeman stopped laughing and knocked me over, severing my left foot, hacking me in the head and killing me.

myfacewhen.jpg

He was probably just bigger than you. If the first attempt at wrestling fails I go for the feet and try to disarm them before going any further.

[Guuo]

True, I was a dwarf after all. Thing is, this is probably the first time I have ever met bandits who I cannot wrestle into complete submission, even with a regular run of the mill character without insane stats.

[Leafsnail]

Found a kobold cave.  And... well, it just keeps going on.   I've literally cleared 43 Z levels of kobolds now (74 killed - great for my stats, but makes me feel terrible).  Also I'm drowsy and hungry (but not hungry enough to eat the kobolds...), hopefully the kobold corpses will let me not starve to death (I went in here for food, and it seems like Kobolds keep absolutely no food anywhere in their ridiculously large cave).

Oh right, and

The kobold stonecrafter punches you in the upper front teeth from behind with his right hand and the severed part sails off in an arc!

At least I have a memento from this venture.  I wish I could make these teeth into a necklace.

[Excedion]

Im kinda stuck at the moment. Just got a quest ive never had before and no idea where to go. Its pointing to a hamlet but no idea where abouts i have to go

[Leafsnail]

So... I think I'm at the bottom of the kobold cave.  82 Z levels down.  124 kobolds killed.  Fighting taken from Dabbling to level 3 Legendary (and a lot of other nice stats).  I guess it's time to leave and finally rest (at least I realised I was carrying a Cougar Corpse and thus had food at hand).  Truly this genocidal incident shall be remembered throughout history.

[MadocComadrin]

Just remember to store those kobold rings and such if you decide to pick up that adventurer again XD.

[Leafsnail]

Hey, they're well stored in that huuuuuuuge  cave complex.

A side note: My lasher is MiA.  As far as I can tell the caves go on... but I could see no actual ramp down there.  The only way to continue would be to jump and not be able to get back.  I saw a freshly slain kobold down there so it's quite possible my Lasher accidentally jumped down there and is still there happily slaying kobolds to this day.

I'm getting a different issue at the moment, though.  I've been directed to "Crowdedhells", a dark fortress, to kill a particular goblin.  However... there doesn't seem to be anything here.  No goblins, no building.  Are dark fortresses hidden in some way?