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[Don Blake]

All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality.  It is studded with steel, decorated with char bone and pig tail and encircled with bands of char bone, yellow jasper and turtle shell.  This object menaces with spikes of two humped camel bone, giant cave spider silk, and steel.  On the item is an image of five pointed stars in turquoice.

All in all, a pretty bad-ass artifact, though it'd be nice if they'd made it out of goblin bone instead of fish, I guess.

But what really sells it?

The name.  Tetistvakist.  "The Flimsy Laces."

[Jacob/Lee]

I can make you're battle axe with my adamantine mug!

dun-dun-duuuuunnnnn

[Tyrius]

could be worse. could have been crappie bones instead of char

"This is a crappie bone battle-axe"

[Jacob/Lee]

We need a carp bone battle axe.
*A hero picks up the axe*
Hero:Say, Urist, what is this thing made of?
Urist:Carp bones.
Hero:OH GOD!
*Hero dashes off leaving the axe behind*

[Chalk]

My turtle-bone floodgate and I will just be over here, holding back the hordes of invaders while you figure out how to sharpen that thing.

[ungulateman]

No, what we need is an adamantine war hammer / maul, forged with the charcoal of a slain SoF, named 'The Hammer of Daemons'.

With menacing spikes of admantine, naturally.

[Satarus]

and an image of a dwarf striking down a !!clown!! and an image of the hammer.  All artifacts need some recursion in them.

[CrossBolt]

It also needs a dwarf who crafted the battle axe striking down a demon as an image on it

[assimilateur]

though it'd be nice if they'd made it out of goblin bone instead of fish

I disagree. Fish bone is the perfect, surreal weapon material. And the way I see it, the more ridiculous artifacts are, the better.

[Deon]

It must have an image of its creator striking down a demon WITH THIS HAMMER.

[shadowform]

So, the dwarf decided to make the BLADE out of fish bone and DECORATE it with steel?

[Mapleleaf]

Dwarven logic at its finest

[Don Blake]

So, the dwarf decided to make the BLADE out of fish bone and DECORATE it with steel?

And then apparently named it after elven lingerie.

[Malibu Stacey]

All in all, a pretty bad-ass artifact, though it'd be nice if they'd made it out of goblin bone instead of fish, I guess.

There is a way to "influence" that. If you forbid all the stuff you don't want them to use they should go pick up something you do want to use. e.g. if you had forbid the char bones in the forge after it had been taken there by the moody dwarf he or she would go find some other bones so if the only non-forbidden bones are goblin ones they'll claim those. The only exception I've found is some dwarves absolutely must have a certain type of item. One of my dwarves claimed a magma forge & would only use 3 Black Bronze bars as he really liked Black Bronze. I only had 2 bars in inventory at the time & I usually forbid all the bars other than Steel, Aluminium & Platinum when I get a strange mood anyway so when I forbid them he just sulked in the workshop until I unforbid them & made a 3rd one for him (he made a Black Bronze Warhammer though). Never forbid stuff after they start making the artifact only during item collection or before a workshop is claimed as they'll fail the artifact & go insane if you do.
A less 'underhanded' way is to make a room with the workshop & stockpiles with only the type of stuff you want your dwarves to use for the artifacts. You may still need to micromanage by forbidding/claiming doors leading to your artifact workshops & your normal ones depending on your setup though.

[Grimlocke]

Forbidding items while dwarves are allready in process of makijng some silly artifact out of it doesnt make them go nuts.

I once had some peasant go nuts over my last 3 logs of wood on a treeless map, and as I wasnt interested in a woodcrafter I just forbade his 3 logs to build a watermill that I needed.

He didnt go nuts, and even made an artifact out of nothing at all. I think it ended up being cave lobster shell or something. He even still got his legendary woodcrafter skill.