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Author Topic: ascii quest  (Read 3290 times)

kilakan

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #15 on: February 22, 2010, 07:03:36 pm »
kick goblin in the nuts.
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Nom nom nom

LeoLeonardoIII

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #16 on: February 22, 2010, 07:14:35 pm »
Quote from: kilakan
kick goblin in the nuts.

I bet we don't mind our shoes touching his filthy junk - forcefully!
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Armok

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #17 on: February 23, 2010, 01:34:14 pm »
Don't do that! The goblin might stasrt to yell obcenities!

Instead, count from -5 to 5 aloud
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So says Armok, God of blood.
Sszsszssoo...
Sszsszssaaayysss...
III...

dwarfguy2

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #18 on: February 23, 2010, 02:37:23 pm »
-5 -4 -3 -2 -1 0 1 2 3 4 5.

wow, that did absolutely nothing!

>kick goblin in the nuts

       #________
         #..@g...|
         #______|
___________
|...............|
|.............@|
|_________+

you kick the goblin in the nuts. you're wearing boots, so you do 4 damage. the goblin begins to bleed out of them, so you stop on his neck until his head breaks off.


       #________
         #..@......|
         #______|
___________
|...............|
|.............@|
|_________+

you put his head in your pocket (NOT your coinpurse) and wonder what to do next.
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LeoLeonardoIII

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #19 on: February 23, 2010, 03:05:53 pm »
Continue along the path of the # to escape this Gaol of Goblinitude!
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kilakan

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #20 on: February 23, 2010, 07:31:51 pm »
Continue dow the path, next person we run into, pull out goblin head, wave it in their face, laugh, start to walk away, and then beat them unconcious with the head.
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Cheddarius

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #21 on: February 24, 2010, 12:35:43 am »
Do what Kilakan said.
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dwarfguy2

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #22 on: February 24, 2010, 09:23:06 am »
         V
        @
        #_______
         #...........|
         #______|
___________
|...............|
|.............@|
|_________+

you suddenly come face to face with a large green alien. it begins spouting the worst poetry you've ever heard.
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Cheddarius

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #23 on: February 24, 2010, 11:06:02 am »
Enjoy poetry.
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dwarfguy2

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #24 on: February 24, 2010, 12:14:16 pm »
how can you enjoy something you don't understand half the words of?
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Ottofar

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #25 on: February 24, 2010, 02:15:04 pm »
Ask the alien to build a hyperspace bypass over some other star, like Betelgeuse.
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Criptfeind

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #26 on: February 24, 2010, 03:55:45 pm »
> insert babelfish.
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dwarfguy2

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #27 on: February 24, 2010, 03:58:54 pm »
>insert babelfish

your PRISON OUTFIT comes with a free babelfish

>ask alien to build hyperspace bypass elsewhere

you would, but your GOBLIN HEAD, who's name is drof really really bad, objects.
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Armok

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #28 on: February 24, 2010, 04:19:08 pm »
> punch byrocrat in the snout to establish superiority.
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Sszsszssoo...
Sszsszssaaayysss...
III...

dwarfguy2

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Re: ascii quest
« Reply #29 on: February 24, 2010, 04:21:49 pm »
GOBLINS do not have SNOUTS.
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