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[Psychoceramics]

they have all of the downsides of being a dwarf with none of the upsides. they consume resources while producing none of their own.

i never activate my justice system so i ignore their mandates all day long with no ill effects but unhappy nobles. And I don't really care if the nobles are unhappy, they don't do anything.

[darkrider2]

Can someone explain the noble hate to me?

because noble = insurgent! They exist to challange your power. All dissenters must be given the strongest punishment!

NO REMORSE! NO MERCY! INCINERATE THE HERATIC!

[bluea]

The nobles mentioned in the OP are basically the sane ones.

You can either appoint or influence the decision for a couple - and you can generally to avoid having a Mayor or Captain who demands Adamantine Items, Glass Item, Silk Item andor Bismuth Item (on areas where you have none of the above, or can't find them if you do have access).

The Dungeon Master actually (a) has skills, (b) uses them. Hard to argue very hard or long with the guy who tamed Cthulhu (or whatever) and made his own breastplates first.

So "Noble Hate" is really directed more at just the more useless varieties. And there are a couple of triggers that will get you steamed when they do happen. There's the bug involving "Demands a _ item" A what item?!? Exactly. There's the "needs sand/other missing ingredient" problem. Then there's the reverse.

"Excellent! My new nobles like Rope Reed, Earrings, Blue, Copper, and socks!"

This is all well and good when it comes to fulfilling their desires.

But the second they decide to demand an export ban on something you've already got on the caravan moving to the exit it's time to apply the padlock and then magma to their room.

[Grendus]

You have the nice nobles. The mayor is usually a founder, he's talented and works as hard as a common dwarf. A smart player chooses to give one of his starting seven some social skills to select him as leader, and chooses one with easy demands. If your mayor is a legendary metalsmith who loves copper and cabinets, you let him live and just put his hundreds of cabinets in the rooms for the haulers (incidentally, this reduces fortress clutter as dwarves will attempt to put all that extra clothing in their personal cabinets). The DM is quirky, he tends to walk around wearing nothing but two left socks and three cloaks, but he's a fairly hard worker. Aside from animal duties, he gives you the ability to tame exotic animals (like GCS and dragons) and works your forges. The only drawback to the DM is his tendency to want to do all metalworking jobs when he's only a passable metalcrafter at best, but a few skill restrictions on the forge stops that. If you order up batch of iron to be smelted, expect the DM to be one of the first dwarves to grab a chunk of magnetite and head for the magmaworks.

Wait til you get the baron/baroness and his/her entorage: the baron/baroness bitch consort, the IRS agent, and the enforcer. All they do is party all day, then make ridiculous demands and give even more ridiculous punishments when you don't deliver. They are one of the few creatures hated more than elves, at least elves bring you wood on desert maps and serve as a good supply of *elf bone bolts*.

[Skooma]

They themselves are useless while endangering the productive dwarves with their periodic temper tantrums about the fortress not deigning to divert critical forge time away from weapon and armor smithing for some stupid trinket for themselves out metal we don't even have.

[Ze Spy]

nobles keep making mandates that the entire map , or even caravans , have nothing to do with

worst of all , you have to make it yourself , so if a noble mandate-spam for mircoline ore , you are screwed, no , anything you buy from caravans does not count

yea , the DM and COTG does some jobs , with the DM and mayor only the useful nobles , the rest are just useless pieces of crap

our noble hate also redirects to the fucking useless economy , the economy makes dwarfs HAVING to earn money by working , which is a pain in the ass , and all the rooms they have now have fucking rent , every month , this shit takes away a amount of the dwarfs money , and if the tax collector is there , he adds to it by taking away a good quarter of the EVERYONES money

and also , you have to give them big , good rooms just because they are freaking jerks

the DM , COTG , king/queen(makes no mandates)  , philospher(needs  nothing) ,  and mayor have a good reason as the only good nobles , and the mayor can calm down people and make them happy and work hard like a normal dwarf , enough to fufil his own mandate himself , the DM can train extoic animals like the GCS , dragon , and others , plus , he will be the first to do any metalsmithing work , unless someone outspeeds him , he will be the first to do any metalsmithing job , as for the king/queen and philosper...... just give them a room and they will do fine , they don't need anything else(king/queen still needs a royal room , tho)

[Spaghetti]

is there a way to delete only the duke/duke bitch and taxcollector?

[uran77]

Seeing we'll get dwarven healthcare next version, impaired laborers won't be much of an issue, as long as the hammerer doesn't have anything sharp to dispense dwarven justice...
Do remember the king and queen are NOT replaceable nobles (fortunately they seem to not make mandates at all), nor the advisor (which I think does some mandates). The philospher also appears to not be replaceable (although he'll be dropped on the next version)

wat the philospher will be dropped from game no!

[NW_Kohaku]

You can kill the consort with complete impunity, so long as you butter up the baron(ess) first, so that she doesn't tantrum afterwards.

I gave mine a palatial residence, let her eat in my legendary dining hall, which was a masterpiece meal, and she was so happy that when I put her husband in my execution chamber, and let her watch me spike him repeatedly through the window, she still stayed ecstatic. (BWAHAHAHA!)

He actually wasn't that bad... I think he liked tin (which I had plenty of), granite, doors, and cows, or something (although I think he liked some minor gem which would have been a problem).  But there is no reason not to kill your consort (unless you're just desperate for more noble spawn)...

It's those gems that can be the worst problems.  If they demand crap you've never heard of, and you can't import any of it, it's time to have them inspect the execution chamber.

[Aspgren]

I kinda like the nobles.

They add fun to my fortress. I try to please them and keep them alive, but somehow they always get caught up in trouble ... they're so god damned sensitive that when a tantrum spiral starts they get wiped out of existance very quickly.

Also in one of my forts a skeletal giant eagle made its way through the window and killed my duchess while in bed. The duke went mad with grief shortly afterwards.

[NW_Kohaku]

Also in one of my forts a skeletal giant eagle made its way through the window and killed my duchess while in bed. The duke went mad with grief shortly afterwards.

Even without hating nobles, that's actually pretty awesome.  (Note to self, scrap those plans on making a glass tower for my queen...  Marble is cooler, anyway.)

The best thing I can say about tantrums with nobles is... be really lavish.  The easiest way to please a noble is to give them a really, really nice set of rooms... just remember that you have to make sure that each one is nicer than the last.  It's not hard when you have a legendary engraver, since just plain doubling the size of the room will easily double the value of the room - those masterwork engravings are worth 120 times the value of the stone they're engraved upon (and 50 for the rest, with 27% chance for masterwork, so 69 on average).  That's pretty much just a 4x4 room, plus the walls.

I tend to like making the nobles rooms fill up the extra space between my stairwells for the rest of my housing, and the cliff face around them when I build vertically in the mountains.  That extra space would have gone to waste if I hadn't put it in the noble's room, anyway.

Other good ways to keep nobles happy include setting up those legendary statue gardens they can waste all their time socializing around, and put in cages with at least one of every animal you can get your grubby mitts on, except for hateable vermin.  If you can get them pets, even better, they don't have to go to the cages to get the happy thoughts.

When you add in masterwork cooking, that should keep them almost permanently ecstatic.

[Ze Spy]

i just found out the DM , COTG , hammerer(obvious) and mayor nobles tend to kill alot more then basic dwarfs while going berzerk/tantruming

[Deimos56]

I will say this much, because wasting resources on noble execution is almost as annoying as wasting resources on noble appeasement.
The sooner you somehow end up with an Iron, bauxite, or Steel bed through a mood, the better.
Iron doors, iron cabinets, chairs, tables, everything.

You will not regret it when you only need to make the very first set of furniture.
If you decide you like a noble, then you can replace the iron with something he likes. Just keep it handy in case the noble gets... problematic.

Well, obviously, this only has a point if you have magma. And plenty of the above three materials.

(Iron, Steel, and Bauxite are lava proof.)

[o_O[WTFace]]

The Mayor/Manager/Bookeeper/trader aren't really nobles, they are administrators who do stuff for you.  The dungeon master runs around doing metalworking stuff for you, plus they can tame dragons and stuff.  Plus they have simple tastes like gold and silver and gems (which are pretty easy to find on most any map, as opposed to say sand).  Mine showed up wearing nothing and now runs around wearing a coating of mud and vomit. 

[bhamv]

I love nobles.  They inspire me to design better and better deathtraps.

I recently upgraded my downing chamber to kill up to five nobles at once, instead of one by one like before.