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Author Topic: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.  (Read 5248 times)

Sysice

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #15 on: February 15, 2010, 03:07:18 am »
"Life is, in a word, death."

Deeeeeeeeeep.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke on February 21, 2011, 01:33:32 pm
I managed to make a dog that bled bees.
Quote from: Threetoe
Imagine evil grass that looks like a mass of wriggling worms. Happy holidays!

Dwarven WMD

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #16 on: February 15, 2010, 03:09:57 am »
Quote from: Sysice on February 15, 2010, 03:07:18 am
"Life is, in a word, death."

Deeeeeeeeeep.
Can you argue differently about Dwarf Fortress?  :P
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The Russian throws Steiner into a chair, screaming "I do not care about genetic research!"
The Russian pulls out a M1911!
The Russian screams "I am Viktor Reznov! And I, will, have, my, REVENGE!"
The Russian shoots Steiner between the eyes.
The Russian loses juice.

Doomshifter

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #17 on: February 15, 2010, 03:18:45 am »
"The open structure of the temple allows one to experience torture for oneself."

I got the hell away from that temple.
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Add me on PesterChum! My chumhandle is doomedHermit.
Quote from: Neonivek on January 28, 2012, 04:45:13 pm
Right now Rampages seem to be Godzilla quietly walking into Tokyo, biting the leg off of one reporter... then creeping off again without a sound.

Acanthus117

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #18 on: February 15, 2010, 03:22:16 am »
Quote from: Doomshifter on February 15, 2010, 03:18:45 am
"The open structure of the temple allows one to experience torture for oneself."

I got the hell away from that temple.

You should have thrown him off the walkway and make HIM experience torture.

also:

"may rape go with you." WTF
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Is apparently a Lizardman. ಠ_ಠ
Quote from: Janet on June 20, 2010, 10:44:26 pm
YOU DOUBLE PENIS
"The pessimist is either always right or pleasantly surprised; he cherishes that which is good because he knows it cannot last."

tomas1297

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #19 on: February 15, 2010, 03:30:26 am »
Quote from: Acanthus117 on February 15, 2010, 03:22:16 am
Quote from: Doomshifter on February 15, 2010, 03:18:45 am
"The open structure of the temple allows one to experience torture for oneself."

I got the hell away from that temple.

You should have thrown him off the walkway and make HIM experience torture.

also:

"may rape go with you." WTF
"When you wake up in the morning consider rape."
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Quote from: CriticallyAshamed on October 15, 2011, 03:51:46 am
There was a time when cocksuits would have offended me. It's kind of bad that the time has passed.

Acanthus117

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #20 on: February 15, 2010, 03:37:18 am »
Bwahahaha!

... I had that, except it was suicide.  :'( HE DUN LIKE ME MAMEEE

but then, I killed him!  8)
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Is apparently a Lizardman. ಠ_ಠ
Quote from: Janet on June 20, 2010, 10:44:26 pm
YOU DOUBLE PENIS
"The pessimist is either always right or pleasantly surprised; he cherishes that which is good because he knows it cannot last."

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #21 on: February 15, 2010, 08:21:33 am »
"...He stole Tuber Beer!"

Uh huh. What'ya know. The town leader is a Drunk.

Also:

"Praise murder."

I did. Messily.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Deimos56

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #22 on: February 15, 2010, 01:45:59 pm »
When you wake up in the morning, consider Rainbows.

...I don't think my dwarves... are dwarves...
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Quote from: piecewise on September 24, 2011, 07:54:37 pm
I'm curious what the barely conscious ai wrote about.
Quote from: Seraphim342 on October 17, 2011, 02:32:34 am
Well that went better than expected.  He went nuts and punched a rabbit to death, then the dogs and the whole dining hall ripped him to shreds.

Umi

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #23 on: February 15, 2010, 02:12:49 pm »
I asked a town leader about her family and she said her husband was her uncle, brother and son.  I'm not even sure how that is possible...>_<

I tried to kill her, but I was a new adventurer and she crossbowed my face...
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roger123275

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #24 on: February 15, 2010, 02:54:41 pm »
When you get up in the morning, consider cats.

This was in the same town that I got a quest to kill a cat.
« Last Edit: February 15, 2010, 02:56:24 pm by roger123275 »
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Quote from: timmeh on December 17, 2009, 06:12:10 pm
It gave me 56 dwarves to reclaim with... I'm hoping the game is just being nice to me...
Quote from: Itnetlolor on September 12, 2009, 12:42:27 pm
Good job Roger!

Cheddarius

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #25 on: February 15, 2010, 02:59:31 pm »
Hah. Pretty awesome.
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Diablous

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #26 on: February 15, 2010, 05:58:12 pm »
So much sig worthy material.
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Quote from: Solifuge
A catgirl, whom oft it would please
To dine on a pizza, with cheese,
Thought it was quite fine
To be partly feline,
Excepting the hairballs and fleas.

Dwarven WMD

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #27 on: February 16, 2010, 04:39:16 am »
Quote from: Umi on February 15, 2010, 02:12:49 pm
I asked a town leader about her family and she said her husband was her uncle, brother and son.  I'm not even sure how that is possible...>_<

Dwarf Fortress: The only game where the Grand Father Paradox doesn't tear a dimensional rift somewhere.

Actually, maybe that's what HFS is.
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The Russian throws Steiner into a chair, screaming "I do not care about genetic research!"
The Russian pulls out a M1911!
The Russian screams "I am Viktor Reznov! And I, will, have, my, REVENGE!"
The Russian shoots Steiner between the eyes.
The Russian loses juice.

Deon

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #28 on: February 16, 2010, 11:58:55 am »
There is no paradox in df and all bloodlines are actual.
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Judas Maccabeus

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Re: The strangest/funniest/etc. thing you've ever heard an NPC say.
« Reply #29 on: February 16, 2010, 12:30:36 pm »
I can't say that I heard it myself, but buried deep in the Funniest Names thread is this:

Quote from: yougiedeggs on September 18, 2008, 10:25:03 pm
They say that the pool of stagnant water in the temple of mold allows one to experience disease.
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Quote from: Rowanas on July 31, 2009, 04:27:25 pm
Quote from: smjjames on July 31, 2009, 02:41:30 pm
I'm talking about the bronze colossus. It's supposed to be made entirely of bronze.
But really he's just a softie inside. They all are really. When megabeasts come to your fort you never welcome them inside and give them a hug, do you. You heartless bastards...
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