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Author Topic: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .  (Read 14685 times)

Aqizzar

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #180 on: February 13, 2010, 02:35:22 am »

Its mindless fun that makes me fell smarter.

You have no idea how right you are.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
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Realmfighter

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #181 on: February 13, 2010, 02:37:28 am »

That misspelling was purely unintentional.

I'm going to cry, you mean bastard.

Its 2 at night, and I've just finished eating a box of Oreos. I'm going to regret posting most everything in the morning. I can feel it in my soul.
« Last Edit: February 13, 2010, 02:58:57 am by Realmfighter »
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We may not be as brave as Gryffindor, as willing to get our hands dirty as Hufflepuff, or as devious as Slytherin, but there is nothing, nothing more dangerous than a little too much knowledge and a conscience that is open to debate

Aqizzar

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #182 on: February 13, 2010, 02:59:06 am »

Halfway through chapter three.  I want to meet the manchild who wrote this.  I would have complimented him as grammatically astute, but the punctuation is starting to slip.  Whoever he is, he counts the Constitution, human decency, and the writ of God Himself below his faith in the Republican Party.  John Warner as Secretary of Defense I can buy, but now he's got Henry Paulson as a self-referential fascist, Mike Mukasey stiff as a board, and Bill Clinton sells national defense secrets for some cheap tail*.

If this was ever intended to be anything like a serious story, I'm taking the good advice here and not treating it as such.  I will read it as a comedy.  Flat, dry, and saccharine, like a Mountain Dew Martini.  But a comedy all the same.  Otherwise I'd have to kill myself after reading it.

EDIT: Disregard, I suck cocks and don't read before commenting.  Actually, Bill Clinton blows a bitch away with a shotgun.  Best part of the story yet.  I take back all my harsh words about the author.
« Last Edit: February 13, 2010, 03:02:18 am by Aqizzar »
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
The ancients built these quote pyramids to forever store vast quantities of rage.

Realmfighter

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #183 on: February 13, 2010, 03:01:40 am »

You should record your reading of this. Just for the killing yourself jokes.
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We may not be as brave as Gryffindor, as willing to get our hands dirty as Hufflepuff, or as devious as Slytherin, but there is nothing, nothing more dangerous than a little too much knowledge and a conscience that is open to debate

KaelGotDwarves

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #184 on: February 13, 2010, 06:57:14 am »

I don't care how good it is, it can't be as good as http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHxyZaZlaOs

Jackrabbit

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #185 on: February 13, 2010, 07:18:10 am »

Dude, that's like comparing anything at all ever to Barack Obama. It's just not fair.
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Aqizzar

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #186 on: February 13, 2010, 07:42:32 am »

I don't care how good it is, it can't be as good as http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHxyZaZlaOs

its time for me to do what has to be done by me and help my brother to defeat the enemies!

Every time I watch it, it's as funny as the first.  Also, damn you people.  I'm still reading this abomination of a novella.  It's like potato chips made of 6th grade creative writing.  Really, I'm just waiting to see what happens when the demons wise up and the play of events actually gets interesting.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
The ancients built these quote pyramids to forever store vast quantities of rage.

Jude

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #187 on: February 13, 2010, 07:57:14 am »

Jude, the Southern States where hands down some of the largest money makers in the union at the time. The only reason the north even won that war was  the fact that the Norths Naval Superiority allowed them to blockade southern ports, and that the European powers where too busy to jump at the chance to defend their cotton supplys and fracture the US.

relevance?

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The revolutionary war was absolutely started by America. I don't want to have to repeat American History class for everyone, but suffice to say, taxes and the "Boston Massacre" don't really count as an attack on our soil. That's of course discounting the fact it technicly was Britains soil at the time.
Yeah but once we used our natural right of self determination and said we were our own country then Britain didn't want to listen and started fighting us

hence defending

wait what the fuck...why am I referring to America as "us"

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As for the South not doing anything for America today, that's just blatant ignorance.
we could already have universal health care and gay marriage, to name the first two of a million things that pop into my head


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When you have a Wasp nest outside your house, and you are stung by wasps. Do you decide to just hang back and slap the wasps as they come, or do you attack them at thier source?
what a fantastic analogy

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I don't know about you, but I'd prefer a military that targets and attacks threats before we've got enemy forces on our shores.
Ah, big fan of the Dick Cheney school of foreign policy I see. Glad it worked out so well for you



@ Aqizzar: I didn't read  that story, but are we looking at another My Immortal here?
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Siquo

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #188 on: February 13, 2010, 08:05:29 am »

Please don't send Dick Cheney to The Hague!

The US is one of the few countries in the world that does not recognise the international court for war-crimes, and actually has a law making it legal for them to invade the netherlands if we ever put an USAian on trial there.

I'm also going to stop say "american" if I mean "USAian". Don't feel offended now, for Europe it's pretty common, if you call a dutch guy german (or vice versa), or a frenchman an italian (or vice versa) they're all offended. So in order not to offend any South- or Middle-American, or Canadians, they're all USAians now.
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This one thread is mine. MIIIIINE!!! And it will remain a happy, friendly, encouraging place, whether you lot like it or not. 
will rena,eme sique to sique sxds-- siquo if sucessufil
(cant spel siqou a. every speling looks wroing (hate this))

Aqizzar

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #189 on: February 13, 2010, 08:10:23 am »

It's still easier than what the Latinos call us - Estadosunidenses.  Try saying that five times fast.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
The ancients built these quote pyramids to forever store vast quantities of rage.

Jreengus

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #190 on: February 13, 2010, 09:15:50 am »

Estadosunidenses. Estadosunidenses. Estadosunidenses. Estadosunidenses. Estadosunidenses.

Oh wait, say not type.
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Oh yeah baby, you know you like it.  Now stop crying and get in my lungs.
Boil your penis. I'm convinced that's how it happened.
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Forumsdwarf

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #191 on: February 13, 2010, 10:20:59 am »

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You keep repeating 9/11

And you keep forgetting it.

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That was YEARS ago

So?  We know what they would do to us if they could, and that hasn't changed.  A threat is a threat regardless of its time horizon.

Of course eventually they'll be fighting an army of robots.  There's something poetically existential about suicide bombers killing drones.  It's like going on a hunger strike or setting yourself on fire.  I mean it's one thing to run into a crowded barracks or shopping mall with a bomb or kill a bunch of Russian schoolkids.  We understand that -- your cause and your God are so fucking awesome it justifies murdering innocent people on purpose.
But run into a "motor pool" of robotic drones, run right up to the meanest-looking robot in the complex, throw your trenchcoat open, yell "Allahu Ackbar!" and BOOM!  That's, like, really far out, y'know?  That's making a statement, like people would just stare and think, "WTF?"  All those pissy conservatives who demanded suicide bombers be labeled "homicide bombers" for God-knows-what pedantic nitpick would be left looking like a bunch of douchebags.  That's some hardcore activism right there.

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and for ALMOST evryone it was over a hundred miles away and involving nobody they knew

Almost everyone knows Todd Beamer.
"Let's Roll."

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I said VILLAGE, not city or country. The closest 150 people is your "village"

Even if I accept your pathetically parochial worldview, Islamic terrorists aren't at war with New Yorkers; they're at war with Americans.  "My village" happens to be populated mostly by Americans.  I possess inductive reasoning skills sufficient to recognize what that means before the other explosives-laden shoe drops.

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you might be "brainwashed"

You might be retarded.

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I mean, the Taliban weren't behind it [9/11]

They were allied with Al Qaeda and harboring Osama bin Laden.

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Omar Khadr ...willfully depriving one of the right to a fair trial ... breaches

Wrong on two counts: first, Omar Khadr was not deprived of a fair trial, and second, Article VI of the Constitution and thus the U.N. Charter is subordinate to all other provisions of the U.S. Constitution, including the authority of Commander in Chief granted the President.
So even if we did "violate the U.N. Charter", which at least for Khadr we didn't, for that to be illegal it would have to supercede the U.S. Constitution, which it doesn't.

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Is anyone saying torture is okay?
I'm fine with waterboarding, which is technically not torture but a coercive interrogation technique.  The reason I support it is simply that it works.
It's like picking a lock: there's something we need behind a locked door and we have a tool that gets us past it.  If terrorists didn't want to be waterboarded they wouldn't allow themselves to be captured with heads full of actionable intelligence.

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supporting oppressive governments like ... Israel ...

WTF?  Israel is the most [classical] liberal democracy in the Middle East, and were it not for Iraq the only democracy.  Despite suffering constant attacks from Palestinians Israeli citizens enjoy unprecedented civil liberties, both for a people at war and for a people of the Middle East.  Whatever liberty interests you, be it religious freedom, gay rights, women's rights, economic freedom, or the right to vote Israel is the only country in the Middle East that covers it all.  And they preserve all these liberties unapologetically under a constant rain of shrapnel from artillery shells and suicide bombers courtesy of their age-old foe the Palestinians.
If you think Israel is oppressive you're nuts.

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It absolutely astounds me, more with each passing year, that there's anyone in the country who thinks any differently.

You haven't been keeping up with current events.  Judged by historical standards -- and what other reasonable standards are there? -- Iraq's reconstruction has been an unprecedented success in terms of time and loss of life and an abject failure only in the controlling of monetary cost.  Overall that's not too bad.
Michael Totten and Michael Yon actually went to Iraq and wrote about what they saw both good and bad.  You should take the time to get caught up.

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Maybe some kind of economic sanctions

In my alternative history Adam leads the Eden Tea Party, dumping the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge into the ambrosian ocean.  Since he and Eve boycotted the fruit they never ate it, giving the screenplay an excuse for profligate gratuitous nudity.

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USAian

I prefer "United Statesian"
(Reason: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29g57XTYgLE )

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For all that though, smashing said country leaves America with some responsibility for fixing it
Well said.  Today's enemies can be tomorrow's allies -- but only if we get reconstruction right and the motivations align.  Incidentally our Afghanistan policy scares me -- we can't win hearts and minds burning opium crops.  We could be stuck there fighting a low-grade insurgency forever or we could accept a cheap, plentiful opium poppy on the global market.  Fuck the drugs; kill the damn terrorists.

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My country is my village

Damn straight.  Our Constitution makes us all Americans, one village, one nation of laws and liberty in a world of bureaucrats, God-emperors, kings, Mahdis, and dictators.
Nationalism in defense of the Constitution is no vice.  You'll swear your oath to that Constitution, by the way, not to Bush, Obama, Palin, or God.  It's something you'll find yourself very proud of as you travel abroad.

And thank you for what you are doing for me and my family.  You guys are amazing.
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Realmfighter

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #192 on: February 13, 2010, 01:17:05 pm »

EDIT: Disregard, I suck cocks and don't read before commenting.  Actually, Bill Clinton blows a bitch away with a shotgun.  Best part of the story yet.  I take back all my harsh words about the author.

If you liked that part, your going to love the part were another sexy Baldrik is captured by hookers.
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We may not be as brave as Gryffindor, as willing to get our hands dirty as Hufflepuff, or as devious as Slytherin, but there is nothing, nothing more dangerous than a little too much knowledge and a conscience that is open to debate

Creaca

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #193 on: February 13, 2010, 05:02:18 pm »

Is the fact that every single Demon messenger constantly think they'll be killed for delivering bad news, but always come out alive some kind of inside joke? I mean, as far as I've read it's happened like four or five times.
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Emperor_Jonathan

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Re: Wow. Less than 170 days left . . .
« Reply #194 on: February 13, 2010, 06:40:18 pm »

Is the fact that every single Demon messenger constantly think they'll be killed for delivering bad news, but always come out alive some kind of inside joke? I mean, as far as I've read it's happened like four or five times.

It shows the [very slow] change in the attitudes of the demons, a start to what is needed to defeat the humans.
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