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[Rainseeker]

Enjoy my new podcast! http://www.bay12games.com/dwarves/df_talk.html I had help from my kids and my nieces and nephew, so it's pretty literal when they call me "Uncle."  Enjoy, and Merry Christmas!  ...er, Dwarfmas.

EDIT:

Here is the poem, written by Legendary Poet and community member Smirk: 

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Someone also has to tell "The Night Before Christmas" story in DF style.

"Twas the Night before Dwarfmas"]Twas the night before Dwarfmas, when all through the fort
All the creatures were Sleeping, down to the Consort;
The +Silk Socks+ were hung by the magma with care,
In hopes that St. Urist soon would be there;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of last year's !!Elves!! swam in their heads;

And ma in her +Steel Cap+, and I in my +Cape+,
Had just begun +Kitten Biscuits+ to make,
When from the magma vent rose a loud yell:
"Curse all pathfinding! Armok damn it to hell!"
I ran to the vent's edge and there held my breath,
As grumbles and mutters arose from the depths.

The lurid red light of the magma below
Caused me to squint as I peered at the flow,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a magma-proof +Sleigh+, and eight trained War Reindeer,
With a driver, his face such a mask of distaste,
I knew it must be Urist Claus that I faced.

More rapid than fire imps his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them bad names;
"Now, Rutod! Now, Matul! Now, Dozeb and Sastosh!
On, Dolek! On Aval! On, Amud and Giken!
To the top of the vent! If anyone slacks,
They'll get a taste o' the butt o' me axe!"

As a +Steel Bolt+ that from the +Bronze Crossbow+ is launched,
To pierce a Gob Wrestler through Brain, Lung, and Haunch,
So up to the edge of the vent they did bound,
With a cartload of +Toys+ in a quantum-stacked mound.
The lead Reindeer snorted and showed me his teeth
While the rest commenced braying and strained at the leash.

As I drew back in fear, and was turning to run,
Urist Claus drew his axe and dealt them some Fun.
The magma had done for his clothing and cap
And only his beard kept things under wraps;
Covered in 'deer blood and shouldering his axe,
He looked like an Ironblood after attack.

His eyes -- how they gleamed like the eyes of one Fey!
His sideburns were plaited and starting to fray.
His mouth in perpetual grimace was drawn,
And he tugged at his belt tho' his pants were long gone;
The bung from a barrel he clenched in his teeth,
And alcohol vapors circled 'round like a wreath;

His face was a mixture of rage and of cheer,
As he aimed one last kick at the cowering Reindeer.
He was brawny and stout, a right fearsome old brute,
And spoke only in curses as he bent to his loot;
He shouldered his bag and he gave me a nod,
As off to the row of +Silk Socks+ he did plod;

Nothing but swears, as he finished his work,
+Toys+ for the kids and a Carp for the Clerk,
And then, after noisily cleaning his nose
Into the sock at the end of the rows,
He sprang to his sleigh, beat his team from their Rest,
And flew to the vent like someone Possessed,

But I heard him roar out, ere down he did sweep,
"Leave Ale out next year, or I'll kill ye all in yer sleep!"

[Neonivek]

Congradulations on getting another Dorf Shorts just in time for the swarm

[Duke 2.0]

 "Leave ale out next year, or I'll kill you in yer sleep!"

 Glorious, as usual. Although I must question if you actually got kids to do these recording or you are just a sound editing wizard with your own voice.

[Rainseeker]

"Leave ale out next year, or I'll kill you in yer sleep!"

 Glorious, as usual. Although I must question if you actually got kids to do these recording or you are just a sound editing wizard with your own voice.

Nope, all kids in my podcasts are real, because I have them accessible.  I WISH I was that good!

...What was your guys' favorite quote?

[Neonivek]

Heh, your the Batman of Podcasts. You always have kids lying around somewhere.

[Mephansteras]

Hehe. Awesome!

Not sure if I have a favorite quote, but this might be my favorite one yet. That or Socks...hard choice.

[carebear]

Nope, all kids in my podcasts are real, because I have them accessible.

Accessible as in lying around the house randomly?

[Rainseeker]

Nope, all kids in my podcasts are real, because I have them accessible.

Accessible as in lying around the house randomly?

You would not believe how accurate your assessment really is!

[Urist McCyrilin]

Nope, all kids in my podcasts are real, because I have them accessible.

Accessible as in lying around the house randomly?

You would not believe how accurate your assessment really is!

Are they rechargable or do you have to dispose of them when their battery runs dry?

[Sir Iryn]

Crap, now when I read something it comes out in rhymes in my head.

Sir Iryn cancels Post: went insane.

Sir Iryn has gone stark raving mad!

[jarathor]

That was awesome Rainseeker - I don't think I can pick out a favorite quote. The whole thing was too good.

[Ozyton]

Haha, brilliant =)

Any way you (or someone) can put it up as text?

Also just noticed "I want an axe for christmas" =P

[Shurhaian]

I'm pretty sure the text version is around the forums somewhere...

Edit: Yes, yes it is. Right in the OP, now.

[Ozyton]

Awesome, thanks =)

[Rainseeker]

Smirk did an awesome job, I loved his writing!  Check out the !!symbols!! he put in there, too, for all you purists!