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[Jetsquirrel]

Those sons of bitches! MONKEY STYLE: GORRILLA FIRE GROUND SMASH!! followed by MONKEY STYLE: FIRE CHIMP RAGE!( you know chimpansees that hit and ru naway like mad? i mean that)

[Sensei]

Turn 26

Redwarrior0 (Red the Red)

Say, in a voice that is far too dramatic, "Alas! The tunnel that I discovered as a child really does not exist! Alas!" then head to the ruins of the throne room. I strike no poses until I reach the throne room, at which point I do the usual pose.

(2) Nobody cares about your tunnel. You make your way to the ruins of the the throne room, at the center of the main building. (4) With no more trouble than is to be expected, you find the tapestries and engravings that mark the throne room. (1) Ew- you stepped in guard. (2+1-1=2) Try as you might to be dashing, your cohorts (and you) are somewhat distracted by the gibs you're walking in.

Kilakan (Kilaran)

decide that the best way to annoy the humans is to return their offering to them, toss the gold fish back up the hole then continue onward.

(6) You throw the fish out of the toilet. A little boy starts crying. Happy now? (4) A short way on, you find a four way intersection, and a locked door. It smells bad.

inteuniso (Mailex)

Well then, head to the nearby kobold city and investigate where I could find or steal some gold wire. Using my amazingly accurate Ancient Kobold.

(2) You meant goblin village right? Because that's where you are. (5+1=6) You start to say: "Salutations, citizens- I apologize for my humble garb, please ignore it. But if I may be so bold, I would like to inquire with your jewelry-smith about procuring some gold wire, or maybe leaf?" The goblins simply stare at you in utterly unmitigated awe. (1) Finally, the chief of them breaks the silence: "THAT KOBOLD A WITCH!"

What a well-spoken fellow.

Wimdit (Laodike)

Okay, well, the fiber content is sort of irrelevant, but whatever. Eh, monks are clever bastards, and I doubt one would have come down here with crud on his shoes, or taken crud along to munch on while he murdered someone. Plus there's the intimations of wealth.

Show the Cheesieur the knife and chain to see if he recognizes them, and ask him to be more specific about who buys the cheese. If he gets annoyed about my wasting of his time, give him my shirt as compensation.

(5) The Cheesieur remarks that the knife and chain have had no prolonged exposure to the cheese (the fumes of which will begin to corrode most metals after a relatively short time). Then he winks at you- "Ah, but... surely a cheese connoisseur such as yourself knows to keep your metals safe." You remember you still smell like GCS cheese. You then ask him about who, exactly, tends to buy the cheese. (6) "I'll do you one better." He says with a grin. "One mister Leopold Renaud -heh, known as the rich until recently- was in quite a hurry past my shop, and managed to step in a... special order." He looks at you knowingly. "And for a little side fee... we can see that this conversation never leaves the room.

Jetsquirrel (?)

Those sons of bitches! MONKEY STYLE: GORILLA FIRE GROUND SMASH!! followed by MONKEY STYLE: FIRE CHIMP RAGE! (You know chimpanzees that hit and run away like mad? I mean that.)

(6) "MONKEY STYLE: GORILLA FIRE GROUND SMASH!" You call as you hurtle yourself into the air near the door. (5)(Enemies hit) (4)(1) Ooh. Forgot the fire on that one. Now you just look silly. (3) most of your recruits are engaging the enemy soldiers, more or less at a standoff. (5+1) You dodge the assault of the Sea Lion master, and ready yourself to strike (and then run away like crazy). (1) Nope. He punches you in the face. (1) You're knocked out cold.

(4) When you wake up, your side has won the battle. But three recruits are wounded, as are you. (2) To use any magic healing, you're going to have to venture out for more booze... the Sea Lions stole your reserves.

[Sensei]

In return for the sparseness of updates, I feel I can afford to bump it up to six players for a little while. CJ1145's character will probably be posted tonight, barring substantial writer's block.

[inteuniso]

That's right I'm a witch. And I perform "magic" with my "wand" quite well. Shoot the phaser at the goblin leader.

[Sensei]

CJ1145
Song: Death Death (Devil Devil Devil Evil Evil Evil) Song
Name: Gitte Delvedeep
Race: Human
Gender: M
Skills: Necromancy (1), Complaining (1), Sandwichmaking (1)(No Overshoots)
Equipment: Death Crystals, Necromancy Lab (complete with altar, surgical tools, etc), Ritual Dagger, Book: "How I Did It" by Frank N. Stein
Description: You dress darkly, often in robes, and have long, dark hair. You don't like to show your face, especially in the sun. You spend most of your time in The Painkeep (your parents' basement) brooding and reading ancient, forgotten tomes.
History: You seek necromantic power, much to the chagrin of your parents. You work part time at a cheese sandwich shop. What you really want, though, is to move out- ideally to a hidden lair with a good-sized zombie legion, and all that you need to work on becoming a lich lord. Also, you don't hate hula hoops.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[CJ1145]

 

[RedWarrior0]

> I find a servat to wipe the stuff off my shoes.

[dragnar]

I recommend your first zombie recruit be one of the other players. I promise I have no ulterior motives for this comment, none at all...

[Sensei]

Hey. Ulterior motives are all part of the game.

Oh, and I do suggest you post an action, unless that facial expression is supposed to communicate what you want to do...

[Wimdit]

Tell me tell me tell meee! But I don't care who you tell about this conversation, so no side fee for you.

[Jetsquirrel]

DAMMMMNNN +YOUUUU! go and buy some booze

i feel like a dwarf without booze now

[CJ1145]

Head to my local source of necromantic literature

[kilakan]

feeling ecstatic about the crying of the child, search for any way to open the door.

[Sensei]

Turn 27

inteuniso (Mailex)

That's right I'm a witch. And I perform "magic" with my "wand" quite well. Shoot the phaser at the goblin leader.

(4)(3) You the ugly brute and send him to the ground. (3) The goblins, fortunately, decide not to attack. Clearly no warrior can defeat you, they need a witch doctor. (4) The witch doctor dances around you while chanting what you're sure is not merely a forgotten language, but genuine gibberish, and throws some chalk powder on you. Then you shoot him. You demand gold from them, lest they face your unholy wrath. You love playing the bad guy. (5) One of them brings you a very fine (no doubt stolen) necklace. With a little working, this will probably be suitable. (2) You bring it back to the ship, and the goblins are too afraid to follow you. Unfortunately your comrades tell you you're missing a few more parts than they hope... one of your guidance boosters seems to have found its way to a forested area to the northeast.

Redwarrior0 (Red the Red)

I find a servat to wipe the stuff off my shoes.

(6) "Servat! Get over here!" William Servat cleans your shoes with some rags. (3+1=4) You look much better now.

Wimdit (Laodike)

Tell me tell me tell meee! But I don't care who you tell about this conversation, so no side fee for you.

(5) You whine until the Cheesieur gives you an address- it's with the rest of the nice houses on the west side. (5) He seems to have forgotten he asked you for money in the first place. Naturally, you waste no time in heading to the home of your quarry. You casually stroll onto the property and (4) slip behind some bushes before any servants see you. The house has two storeys (and probably an attic and basement, like most) and a small garden. The only unusual thing about it is that it has a marble fountain- indeed, your little friend is quite opulent.

Jetsquirrel (?)

DAMMMMNNN +YOUUUU! go and buy some booze

(5) "DAMMMMNNN YOUUUU!" You're sure the very heavens heard your curse. (6) Your clan has recruited six of the defeated soldiers. Now, about that booze. (1) On your way, you are attacked by ninjas (1) riding velociraptors! Not like, ninjas who belong to any faction. Just random ninjas. That's how unlucky you are. (4) You manage to duck into an alley, but they can't be far behind. (2) Instead of chasing you, they've gone to the tavern and are hiding on the roof top.

CJ1145 (Gitte Delvedeep)

Head to my local source of necromantic literature

(1) You start up the stairs from your basement The Painkeep. But as soon as you exit, you are accosted by your mother! "Gitte! You're not going anywhere until you take out that old corpse in the basement! It's stinking up the place!" (6) No! You still need that! You think of a plan... the window! (4) You jump out the window onto another low roof, and then down to the street. Well, that's that problem out of the way for now. You head to the place where you've found of what you own: Mr. Macguffin's House of Brain-Addling Curiosities from the Far Weald, more conveniently just called the curiosity shop. Inside is a vast array -or rather, pile- of, well, curiosities. Mr. Macguffin isn't at the counter today- he's probably off in the large shop somewhere.

Kilakan (Kilaran)

feeling ecstatic about the crying of the child, search for any way to open the door.

(5) Yes, making little children cry is definitely your thing. You fancy it a talent. You search for a way to open the door. (1) You have a good idea! Your beard! You slide your beard into the crack between the door and its frame, hoping to move the lock. After a little jiggling... click! You try the door. It's still locked. And worse, your beard is quite thoroughly stuck in the mechanisms of the lock. Unless someone can help you, it will be difficult, painful, and extraordinarily dishonorable to remove.

[Wimdit]

Fashion a crude mask out of whatever happens to be around in order to conceal my identity, and stage a daring one-man raid on the house! Once it is mine by right of conquest, search it thoroughly for useful information. Oh, and capture the master of the house if possible, but, you know, he's probably the killer. If he's not, then he is acceptable collateral damage in my quest for vengeance.