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[Impending Doom]

1st of Granite, 50

“Now, you’ll have a good-ly portion that sticks up above the surface, so we’ll of course need some support gantries up there to keep the whole thing from – ”

Granif put up his hand. “Whoa, whoa, hold up there chief. Are you telling me you plan to launch this damn thing vertically? Using a dried magma vent as a silo? Why, that’s crazy! You’ll be fighting gravity the whole way up on thrust alone– there’s no way it would fly. Here, lemme show you.”

He took the schematic from Kandor, turned the whole thing ninety degrees, and started sketching.

“Alright, when you’re launching a glider, you do it like this:

The way you want to do this is, you want to fight gravity using lift. You lay the craft horizontally – bottom down, of course. You mount some rollers on it, here and here, same way on the other side. The rollers sit up on a set of rails, sloping downhill with a short ramp at the end – our ship’ll be booze-propelled, so you can make it mostly level. Now, the length of the track is a direct function of the – ”

All assembled dwarves looked up as the wagon lurched to a halt. Kandor clambered to the front and stuck his head through the canvas.

“Wassis? Are we stuck?”

Doom looked back at him from the reins, map in hands. “Far from it. We’ve arrived.”



Kandor looked about at the landscape, confused.”That can’t be. I don’t see either of the magma vents.”

“No, no, they’re underground. look at the map.” She handed the map to Kandor. “You see, the mark for the pipe is turned one quarter of one degree to the left. That means it’s subterranean. It’s simple.”

“How… could anyone figure that out? Well, nevermind. If we’re really here as you say, we might as well get started.”



“Doom, take Granif and start digging some lodgings for us. Ieb… you like danger, right? Why don’t you go sounding for that active magma pipe?”

Legon hopped down from his seat by Doom, loading his crossbow. “I’ll go with him. I smelt some ogres on the way in. Master Rawarch, I think it would be best if no one left camp without my supervision.”

“As you wish, seargent. Alright people, let’s get moving!”

(Well, that's brilliant. Both the pit and the magma pipe are underground. Ieb, it looks like you're getting off to a great start.)

[Ieb]

My life for hire!

I won't let you down, boss!
And if I do, it'll be after I breach the magma pipe and get us delicious blood of the mountains.

[LegoLord]

And if I do, it'll be after I breach the magma pipe and get us delicious blood of the mountains.

"NO!  Don't drink it, you soddin' silly dwarf!"

Were my first thoughts on reading that which I quoted.

[Ieb]

Most likely, Ieb's death will be a dare-related one.
Something along the lines of "I dare you to take a sip. Of magma."

"OH YEAH?"

So very sad.

[Impending Doom]

(Update double-tap for your viewing pleasure!)

18th of Slate, 50



“Are you absolutely sure?” Granif called from the bottom of his fifteen-foot shaft.

“Of course,” Ieb returned, clambering down after him, “my equipment is very precise. It should be right below our feet.”

“I still don’t thi –”



As the rock crumbled away, a gust of blistering air blew past the two dwarves, a familiar red glow emanating from below.



“Well I’ll be,” Granif started, “you were right! I see, some aluminum, and copper…”

“And trouble.” Legon said from behind them, shouldering his way to the front.”Look.” He pointed to a small patch of magma that seemed to stir and rise, forming a hideous face. It hissed menacingly at the dwarves, standing just out of reach.

“Magma men. Probably fire imps as well.” He peered over the edge, into the magma.

“Damn. I can’t get a shot at them from here. If you could get me down to their level, without actually going in there…”

(Final score:
Ieb: 1
Fun: 0

I have a feeling you and the magma are gonna be best buds, Ieb.)

[Doomshifter]

In real life, I can't read a map for the life of me. Thank goodness that Dwarf-me is a bit different.

[Impending Doom]

Journal of Kandor Rawarch, 18th of Hematite

Summer already. We are finally beginning to settle into our home for the duration of the project. We have already found an abundance of gemstones in our excavations – both a blessing and a curse: Granif’s first attempt at a farm plot was thwarted by a particularly rich inclusion of clear zircon. I have taken to cutting them in my spare time.



Now that the basic necessities are in place, I believe it is time to set to work on phase one of the construction.

Phase one: Establishment of Infrastructure.
Phase one consists of three projects:

*Project one: Living Quarters
We will require housing and other amenities for the entirety of our race – two hundred dwarves in all. This includes food and alcohol production.

*Project two: Production
Above all else, we will require a metalsmithing and glassmaking industry. We will also need to establish mechanical lines for the ship’s internal workings.

*Project three: Research
We have fuel, and a basic design for the ship, but we still need more. The research team – currently myself, Granif Dodman and Ieb Meddlesome – will require a facility in which to conduct further experiments and design new equipment for the vessel.



I have begun designating areas to be excavated for the living quarters. I will also be skipping ahead to create the forges and furnaces – aside from being necessary for the construction of the ship, we will need them to construct some of the basic necessities.

[Impending Doom]

18th of Malachite, 50
(Everything interesting seems to happen on the 18th)

The piercing howl reverberated throughout the halls, chilling every dwarf to the bone. Kandor dashed through the archway, out into the sunlight.

“Legon! Legon, where the hells are ye?”

“Master Rawarch!” He called from his perch overlooking the entrance.

“What was that? Wolves?”

“Worse,” Legon answered, “a werewolf. Sounded like it was out in the northern woods.”

Shock filled Kandor’s eyes. “Shit, Spartan!”

Legon leapt down from his post, and they both dashed off towards the forest.

---

Spartan lifted his axe, taking another swing at the pine tree. As he readied for one final swing, something caught his eye. Up on the hill, two stout figures stood flailing their arms.

“Eh? Kandor! Legon!”

“Spartan! Spartan, ye daft git, run! It’s right behind you!”

“What’s ri– ”

But as he turned to look, it was on him. As the beast lunged, he lifted his axe and swung, in a futile attempt to resist.

...or perhaps not so futile. The blade swept down the werewolf’s right side, cleaving arm and leg of in one clean stroke. It fell to its knee in front of him, howling in pain. Spartan swung again with the flat of the blade, and flung the wounded beast through the air. It landed in a bloody heap.

---

“Well I’ll be,” Legon said, “he actually killed it. Wait, what’s he doing now?”

Kandor responded, roaring with laughter, “Why, the bastard’s takin’ a nap!”

(Aaand first kill goes to Spartan 117! The battle was over quick; I didn’t get a chance to take any screenshots. The aftermath:



The two little 2’s to the north are the werewolf’s right arm and leg. That’s where they were standing when he punted it. Its corpse is toward the bottom left. Not bad for a first try!
Spartan himself is in the bottom right. He has no wounds, not even light grey. And he’s laying there not unconscious, but asleep. I don’t know why he didn’t go to his bed, but his current job is ‘sleep’ and he’s flashing ‘Z’. Must be the adrenaline.

[Doomshifter]

Woo, go Spartan! Row row fight the powah! And then take a nap.

[Impending Doom]

I don't suppose I should be surprised - he does have no-adjective axedwarf skill, as per Spartan 117's request. Still, the fact that a civilian brought down a werewolf-in two swings, no less-is pretty badass.

[Ieb]

They must have fought with the old navy rules.
He who dies first, LOSES.

And a dwarf NEVER loses.

[Impending Doom]

Actually, Doom, you shouldn't be so quick to praise him. I just took a trip through relationship-land, and Spartan has grudges against you and Granif. Other than that, there doesn't appear to be anything else interes--

Oh shit.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

EDIT: spoiler'd for size and mind-blowage.

[Doomshifter]

I change what I said. I ACTUALLY meant:
Carp I hate that Spartan! He thinks he's so smug 'cause he took down a werewolf... well, I bet I could take down TWO werewolves with my COPPER PICK.

[Ieb]

All I need is my magma, and a mechanism or two, and I could kill all werewolves, now, and for all eternity.

Also, as one of the founding members of this dangerous mission, I ask that I get the first discovered magma pipe named after me on the new world. That, and everyone has to pay me to use it.

[Spartan 117]

Well, I request we eat werewolf burgers tonight!