More crime? Depends on how you slice it. Britain, for example, is in the midst of a pretty ugly surge in crime--sure, they don't have guns, instead the rates of knife-related assaults went through the roof. Also note that we classify a number of victimless crimes as felonies--and that has nothing whatsoever to do with socialism.
Health care? Works fine if you have money. The United States remains the go-to place for experimental or expensive treatments, because that's where the doctors are. Is it as good for people who don't have money? It's not great, and sure, UHC tends to provide more benefits to the poor at great costs overall--there's a reason most medical R&D money comes from the United States, and that's because we are willing to pay for it; if the United States said "we are willing to pay only the highest rate of any other G8 country," their costs would explode too. I, for example, am very happy with our current system. Because I'm taking steps to ensure that a) I will have money, and b) I will have contingency plans to pay if I get ill. If I screw up? Oh well. Life isn't fair.
Literacy? The United States's literacy rate is approximately 99.0% according to UNESCO. The highest rate in Western Europe? Austria. With 99.0%. Come again? (Most of the countries that report higher are countries that are obviously cooking their books--I'm looking at you, Belarus.)
Worse mass transit? Are you seriously bringing this up as a point in favor of "socialized countries"? Have you noticed how big the United States is recently? While better mass transit would be nice, the United States is bigger than the entirety of Western Europe combined by far and is culturally predisposed to individual automobiles to the point where you won't get people to use that vaunted mass transit system.
Worse agriculture? When we need better agriculture, when we benefit from better agriculture, you just let me know, OK?
I grow very tired of the "Europeans are better at everything!1!1111" nonsense. Especially when it isn't really well-backed.