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Author Topic: How many problems can magma fix?  (Read 7408 times)

Lancensis

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #15 on: November 19, 2009, 07:20:22 pm »
Quote from: Dakk on November 19, 2009, 05:59:37 pm
Magma can't fix everything if the problem is magma itself.

Otherwise, it fixes almost everything.

Stronger current of lava headed in opposite direction.
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DaPatman

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #16 on: November 19, 2009, 08:25:29 pm »
I saw this topic and decided to point out my sig.
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Quote from: expwnent on July 23, 2010, 02:54:09 pm
I don't want to set the world on fire
Oh wait, I do.

Lancensis

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #17 on: November 19, 2009, 09:38:55 pm »
And then what happened?
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Sir Finkus

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #18 on: November 19, 2009, 09:43:35 pm »
Quote from: Dakk on November 19, 2009, 05:59:37 pm
Magma can't fix everything if the problem is magma itself.

Otherwise, it fixes almost everything.
Thank god magma is never a problem.  The only problem you can have involving magma is not having enough of it.
« Last Edit: November 19, 2009, 09:53:33 pm by Sir Finkus »
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woose1

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #19 on: November 19, 2009, 09:48:14 pm »
How many problems can magma fix....

Well, anything really, but recently I used magma to help build a castle out of obsodian by mixing it with the tragically carp-populated river. Oh those poor carps. >:D
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Soldats

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #20 on: November 20, 2009, 12:51:29 am »
Alright I completely and totally object to the topic of this thread there is absolutely NO way we can list the number of problems magma can fix, the question you want to ask is what problems CAN'T be fixed with a sufficient amount of magma?
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MagmaDeath

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #21 on: November 20, 2009, 12:52:54 am »
Nothing..
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Knowledge=Power=Energy=Matter=Mass.

Foxbyte

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #22 on: November 20, 2009, 03:30:45 am »
I think Urist McEllison brought this up, or something similar, in their excellent engraving 'I Have No Magma, and I Must Smith'.
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There is an engraving of three dwarves in a dining room. The third dwarf is a soaper.

Naero

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #23 on: November 20, 2009, 05:03:53 am »
Goblin siege? Pour magma on it.

Carp killing your fisherdwarves? Pour magma into your river.

Fire imps harrasing you? Magma, then water. Then mine it out and pour magma on it again.

Cat problem? Pour magma into your fortress.

Nobles problem? Pour magma into your fortress.

Bored? Pour magma into your fortress.

Has magma somehow gotten into your fortress? Good, you have a ready supply of magma for pouring onto things!

Giant eagles flying above your magma? Build a tower to the highest z-level that pumps magma to the top, then flood everywhere with magma. Then pour magma on the tower too.

Have you got magma on your magma in the way of your magma magma magma? Pour magma on it.

I think you can see where this is going...
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Quote from: Toady One
# 03/17/2009: The broken-armed dwarf understood that he needed to run off to the hospital zone properly, but care never came, because I'm still working on that. Poor little buddy.
#  03/18/2009: He's now surrounded by many skilled medical professionals. They still aren't all that useful, but just their presence must be encouraging for him. Well, I guess that's not true either.

Servu

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #24 on: November 20, 2009, 07:48:05 am »
When your problem is too much magma, then congratulations! You have won The Game!
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Aldaris

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #25 on: November 20, 2009, 09:28:24 am »
Quote from: Servu on November 20, 2009, 07:48:05 am
The Game!
DAMMIT. I just lost the game!
Solution: Magma.
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Quote from: Little on January 23, 2010, 11:38:18 pm
but Baron Aqizzar had the firm advantage, battering Cthulhu with his Mighty Chin.
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LumenPlacidum

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #26 on: November 20, 2009, 10:08:22 am »
It is a well-known fact that there is no problem in under 30 meters that cannot be solved with a flamethrower.  Since magma can be used to create what is essentially a flamethrower, then we must conclude that there is no problem that magma cannot solve in under 30 meters.  However, magma has the capacity to form more aerodynamic globs when launched into the air, and as such the range of magma's problem-solving capacity is higher than that of a simple flamethrower.  With a little research, I'll narrow the number down, but I suspect the truth is that some manner of magma-thrower will solve any problem in under 60-90 meters.

A common challenge is that how does a flamethrower solve the problem of being on fire?  The analog, I suppose, would be how does a magmathrower solve the problem of being immersed in magma?  There are several answers to this.  The simplest being that this is not a problem.  There are also answers involving launching more magma to create a thermal bridge to some heatsink, thereby encasing yourself in rock, in which case, magma is not the problem.  Finally, and the answer I prefer: Wait a minute or so, staring at the glowing beauty.  I guarantee you, by the end of it you will not consider the magma to be a problem.
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Rowanas

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #27 on: November 20, 2009, 10:24:39 am »
Q: How many problems can magma fix?
A: OVER 9000!!!
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Quote from: Dutchling on April 14, 2012, 02:28:14 pm
I agree with Urist. Steampunk is like Darth Vader winning Holland's Next Top Model. It would be awesome but not something I'd like in this game.
Quote from: Bumber on November 27, 2018, 01:05:30 am
Unfortunately dying involves the amputation of the entire body from the dwarf.

Rilder

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #28 on: November 20, 2009, 10:26:35 am »
Magma: Dwarven Duck Tape.
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Quote from: Puck on October 29, 2010, 08:08:05 am
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Shades

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Re: How many problems can magma fix?
« Reply #29 on: November 20, 2009, 10:32:01 am »
Quote from: Rowanas on November 20, 2009, 10:24:39 am
Q: How many problems can magma fix?
A: !!OVER 9000!!

Fixed
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