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[Armok]

Are you guys intentionally trying to get me as depressed as possible? Seriously, stop it.

Look, I know I got problems, and just sating to "get over myself", "shrug it of", "keep trying" or any other thing along those lines is only going to make it worse.
And I don't lack friends out of shyness, I lack them because I hold the belief that in order to be friends you need to be equals, and in order to be equals you need to be honest, and I know of no people towards whom I could be honest without becoming an enemy of them rather than a friend. I could use lies, and trick them into believing they were my friends, but living a lie like that would not serve the purpose of getting friendship. This is IN ADDITION TO clinical social incompetence.

[redacted123]

So what you're saying is that there is no one who you can be friends with because you feel the need to point out their every flaw until they hate you? There's a difference between lying and not being a dick.

[Footkerchief]

I hold the belief that in order to be friends you need to be equals, and in order to be equals you need to be honest, and I know of no people towards whom I could be honest without becoming an enemy of them rather than a friend.

Where did you get this belief from if you don't have friends?  And no, that's not how it works.  Honesty as an interpersonal quality is earned as part of the process of becoming closer friends.  I mean seriously, it's obvious from your interactions here that you're only interested in expressing honesty, not in receiving it.  You want to be blunt with everyone but start whimpering if the favor is returned.  So I would say it pretty much boils down to egomania.

[Armok]

I know that, the problem is not IGNORANCE of the realities of human interaction, but a fundamental INCOMPATIBILITY with it.

[Myroc]

Oh so that's it then. There's no way for Armok to make friends IRL, not with that much social incompetence, not a single way, nope, let's just abandon him and have him fend for himself, as there is no way we can help him. Nope, not at all.

It doesn't quite work that way.

I think you got a little bit of "social paranoia", so to speak. You're thinking that anything and everything you can say to a person is going to make that person more hostile towards you (and who knows? You may as well be right). However, you do not know for sure. Talk to people, and you'll be surprised.

Now I now what you're thinking. You're thinking "but these guys are different, they won't get along no matter what I can say to them". Wrong. Everyone says that, and everyone are wrong.

For your own sake and sanity, go out there and talk to people.

(In the rare event that everything you say to a person DOES make them hate you more, then holy fuck, how did you make friends on the internet in the first place?)

[Armok]

It's not fear, it's simply that it's to much time, effort and emotion spent on something futile. Even if the person DON'T become hostile, there is a 95% chance they later turn out to be complete idiots.

The way I got friends on the internet was by going to a place with almost only intelegent peaple (DF forums), a larger than average % that also are psychologically abnormal, and then talking to hundreds of people at once, and geting a single digit number of ones that were understanding enought and compatible enough to actually be valid for atempting to make a friend of.

Some math, containing a lot of assumptions, so I know it dosn't hold to any scrunity, but it generally shows my reasoning:
- Assume that 1 in 5 will manage to look past my social ineptitude and general patheticness.
- Assume 1 in 10 will be able to cope with my strange notion of what friendship entrails and other things.
-Assume 1 in 10 are compatible enough in personality and opinions
-Assume one in 20 are knowledgeable and intelligent enough that I might consider them equals
-Assume finding out if a person is a candidate for friendship or not IRL requires 5 hours of talking.
-5*10*10*20*5=50 000
50000 hours on average per friend.
-Assuming I can spend 20 hours a week looking for friends, what are the probability per year that I'll get one?
-Estimated number of friends needed to replace forums: 15...

[Cthulhu]

/facedesk

Assume one in 20 are knowledgeable and intelligent enough that I might consider them equals

Over yourself.  Get it.

[Myroc]

/facedesk

Assume one in 20 are knowledgeable and intelligent enough that I might consider them equals

Over yourself.  Get it.

What this guy said. Your estimations are inaccurate.

[redacted123]

/facedesk

Assume one in 20 are knowledgeable and intelligent enough that I might consider them equals

Over yourself.  Get it.

What this guy said. Your estimations are inaccurate.

Not only inaccurate but don't even prove your point. Spending time looking for friends or social groups outside of this forum is far from futile, even if it does take forever. Also, someone doesn't need to be your intellectual equal to be your friend and I'm somewhat doubtful that's even a particularly hard criteria to fill.

[Armok]

One thing I require from a freind is that they should understand the things that matter to me, and that includes bizarre, mind-bogglingly complex philosophies having their foundations all over half of all modern science and founded in maths and  cognitive science concepts the vast majority of people dosn't know exist. It dosn't require all that much I, but it dos require the ability to understand extremely complex concepts, and a encyclopaedic knowledge of just about every field of science, technology, and philosophy.

[redacted123]

It sounds like you're just looking for another you. Which you're never going to find because they'll have the exact outlook as you, that there is no one like them. Also, can you just name one of these "mind-bogglingly complex" philosophies please?

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

I've never been stabbed enough to bleed, and I've never broken a bone.
I must be pretty durable.

[Footkerchief]

First off, you're making the basic statistical error of assuming your random variables are independent -- they aren't, so the combined probability is not a simple product.  Secondly, the individual probabilities are trash that you just made up.  Third, friendship is not marriage.  You don't have to be soulmates.  If you let yourself make casual friends -- which doesn't have to take longer than 10 minutes -- you will rapidly become much less socially inept.  That calculation is such a mess that I doubt you even believe it yourself.  Stop making excuses.  Stop thinking you know everything about humanity just because you worked it all out in your head -- that has never worked for anyone, ever.

One thing I require from a freind is that they should understand the things that matter to me, and that includes bizarre, mind-bogglingly complex philosophies having their foundations all over half of all modern science and founded in maths and  cognitive science concepts the vast majority of people dosn't know exist. It dosn't require all that much I, but it dos require the ability to understand extremely complex concepts, and a encyclopaedic knowledge of just about every field of science, technology, and philosophy.

Your philosophies are probably crap.  Believe it or not, it's quite common for people to think they're misunderstood geniuses who have it all worked out.  They are almost inevitably wrong.

[Armok]

It sounds like you're just looking for another you. Which you're never going to find because they'll have the exact outlook as you, that there is *ALMOST* no one like them.

NOW you're getting it. Hence why looking for them is pointless.

The philosophies are, as stated, highly complex and would take books to explain, and do not correspond to any existing ones. They are NOT crap, as my philosophy teacher can testify of.

I am not sure I understand what a "causal friend" is, I though that was called an acquaintance?

[Cthulhu]

Your friends do not need to be exactly like you, or even close.  None of my friends share any of my interests or tastes in music.  They, in fact, make fun of my taste in music, and insist I listen to screamo(FFFFFF-).  They're still my best friends, and I make fun of their tastes in music.  You need to set the bar a little lower.