Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4

Author Topic: My girlfriend  (Read 4189 times)

Cthulhu

  • Bay Watcher
  • A squid
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #15 on: November 06, 2009, 09:17:54 am »
No, it's the other way around.  He's the one that wants to wear one, and she doesn't want him to.

It's not normal.  My response was originally going to be "I don't think you have a girlfriend, enjoy your hand" but I thought better.
Logged
Shoes...

Maggarg - Eater of chicke

  • Bay Watcher
  • His Maleficent Magnificence of Nur
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #16 on: November 06, 2009, 12:35:21 pm »
Set her on fire. Preferably on a pyre made of evangelical anti-contraception leaflets.
Logged
Quote from: Digital Hellhound on February 18, 2009, 10:50:43 am
...I keep searching for my family's raw files, for modding them.

x2yzh9

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #17 on: November 06, 2009, 05:45:24 pm »
Or throw blackpowder on her in a shape of a dwarf.

THEN, light her on fire.
Logged

Eidalac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ecchi Inside
    • View Profile
    • Facebook
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #18 on: November 07, 2009, 09:08:36 am »
My sister was on the pill.  She heard a rumor it can make you gain weight, so she stopped.

She then gained about 10 pounds in the form of my niece, plus a bit.  The weight you gain while pregnant is a beast to loose, and the kid(s) tend to cling to you for several years as well.

She should just suck it up (Ha, double entendre!), do without or take the 3rd option (ha!  I made another funny!).

it's either protection or a baby, and FYI, pulling out or doing it on some 'right day' do not work - they lower the odds but nothing more.  Remember, those bits are made to make babies, and are very good at it in most cases.  Human females are fertile 24/7/365 from puberty to menopause, and the male member does not do 100% of it's work in one go - it leaks boys, sorry to say.
Logged
Quote from: Leafsnail on July 06, 2009, 03:29:18 pm
Quote from: kotekzot on July 06, 2009, 03:11:23 pm
is he okay?
In the traditional sense of the word?  No, he's been dissolved in magma.

DJ

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #19 on: November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm »
No contraception is 100% safe.

Anyway, I call BS. Might as well say she insists on anal and giving head to you.
Logged
Quote from: Sunken on May 19, 2009, 12:51:32 pm
Quote from: Muz on May 19, 2009, 08:37:52 am
Urist, President has immigrated to your fortress!
Urist, President mandates the Dwarven Bill of Rights.

Cue magma.
Ah, the Magma Carta...

florian

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #20 on: November 07, 2009, 01:45:48 pm »
Quote from: DJ on November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm
No contraception is 100% safe.
Death is 100% safe.
Logged

Dakk

  • Bay Watcher
  • BLARAGLGLGL!
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #21 on: November 07, 2009, 01:57:32 pm »
Tell her to go back to the kitchen.
Logged
Code: [Select]
    ︠     ︡
 ﾉ          ﺍ
ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)  ┻━┻

Table flipping, singed style.

Duke 2.0

  • Bay Watcher
  • [CONQUISTADOR:BIRD]
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #22 on: November 07, 2009, 02:15:35 pm »
Quote from: Eidalac on November 07, 2009, 09:08:36 am
it's either protection or a baby, and FYI, pulling out or doing it on some 'right day' do not work - they lower the odds but nothing more.  Remember, those bits are made to make babies, and are very good at it in most cases.  Human females are fertile 24/7/365 from puberty to menopause, and the male member does not do 100% of it's work in one go - it leaks boys, sorry to say.

 Thus why I said best chance. Apart from refraining from sex, it's all chance. Some methods are a damn good chance, but a chance nevertheless.
Logged
Quote from: Aqizzar on October 13, 2010, 04:19:47 am
Buck up friendo, we're all on the level here.
Quote from: Jim Groovester on August 08, 2010, 08:18:09 pm
I would bet money Andrew has edited things retroactively, except I can't prove anything because it was edited retroactively.
MIERDO MILLAS DE VIBORAS FURIOSAS PARA ESTRANGULARTE MUERTO

Cthulhu

  • Bay Watcher
  • A squid
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #23 on: November 07, 2009, 02:19:49 pm »
Quote from: DJ on November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm
No contraception is 100% safe.

Anyway, I call BS. Might as well say she insists on anal and giving head to you.

This is what I was thinking too.
Logged
Shoes...

Jakkarra

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Chairman.
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #24 on: November 07, 2009, 02:42:12 pm »
Quote from: DJ on November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm
Might as well say she insists on anal and giving head to you.

You may call me weird, but i've never really seen why people are attracted to this...
Logged

beefaroni

  • Escaped Lunatic
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #25 on: November 07, 2009, 06:15:39 pm »
I wish my girlfriend would go on a hunger strike. Sorry if thats offensive to anyone, it made me chortle.
Logged

winner

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #26 on: November 08, 2009, 12:42:24 am »
Quote from: Jakkarra on November 07, 2009, 02:42:12 pm
Quote from: DJ on November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm
Might as well say she insists on anal and giving head to you.

You may call me weird, but i've never really seen why people are attracted to this...
me neither
Logged
The great game of Warlocks!

Rilder

  • Bay Watcher
  • Rye Elder
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #27 on: November 08, 2009, 02:54:55 am »
Quote from: Jakkarra on November 07, 2009, 02:42:12 pm
Quote from: DJ on November 07, 2009, 12:23:20 pm
Might as well say she insists on anal and giving head to you.

You may call me weird, but i've never really seen why people are attracted to this...

Hate the idea of Anal.  Oral is nice though I prefer giving oral to the girl...
Logged
Steam Profile
Youtube(Let's Plays), Occasional Streaming
Quote from: Puck on October 29, 2010, 08:08:05 am
It felt a bit like a movie in which two stoners try to steal a military helicopter

Duke 2.0

  • Bay Watcher
  • [CONQUISTADOR:BIRD]
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #28 on: November 08, 2009, 02:56:49 am »
 While the calm discussion is welcome, we must take caution to not to drive into territory that Toady might not want on his site. I suppose we have a bit of leeway here as this isn't smut so much as a discussion, but we must take caution nevertheless.
Logged
Quote from: Aqizzar on October 13, 2010, 04:19:47 am
Buck up friendo, we're all on the level here.
Quote from: Jim Groovester on August 08, 2010, 08:18:09 pm
I would bet money Andrew has edited things retroactively, except I can't prove anything because it was edited retroactively.
MIERDO MILLAS DE VIBORAS FURIOSAS PARA ESTRANGULARTE MUERTO

Vester

  • Bay Watcher
  • [T_WORD:AWE-INSPIRING:bloonk]
    • View Profile
Re: My girlfriend
« Reply #29 on: November 08, 2009, 03:02:11 am »
Does she, I dunno, want to get pregnant or something? Because I can see no reason, (other than religious ones) why she would want you not to use contraceptives.
Logged
Quote
"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4
« previous next »