I found this in one of my old, saved, unposted writings on my computer. I guess I stopped since I couldn't think of any more past 6. What do you guys think should go on the list for boring-ness?
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Boring Person Syndrome is an increasingly pervalent syndrome in our current society. The sad thing is, much like amnesia or personality disorders, the victim has no idea he is a sufferer until it's too late. There has been much progress in the field of BPS analysis in the recent years but though we still have no real idea what causes it or how to treat it, we do know what it does. It makes you a dull and boring forgettable. There are a lot of BPS sufferers here in these forums, so without pointing any fingers, here's some clues that you might just be that person who no one is ever interested in.
1. Political-correctnessWe all know people who are like this. The kind of person who sticks up his nose at awesome jokes because they consider them to be "crude" or "insensitive" or even worse... politically incorrect. There's just no pleasing these kinds of people as they spend their days eating plain oatmeal, watching the weather channel on mute every day while getting into fits about how the weather reports are never 100% right.
2. Conspiracy theoristThere is no better way to alienate and bore off everyone you know and love by saying and believing these theories. You might think they're perfect arguments because no one has managed to defeat them yet, but really, it's only because no one could be arsed enough to have to go through such things on your behalf. So please, stop with these, no matter what you believe.
3. Quotations-at-every-opportunityPeople have been hiding this trait better recently. In the past, they were easily identifiable and ignorable because of the unhinging desire to quote some famous person at every available opportunity. Nowadays it's discovered when your friends stumble across the blog you've been ardently following and been reciting like a recording machine.. You don't want to be the guy who's only opinions are those of other, more charismatic, people.
4. Mild injury excuse"Hey, do you want to go skiing this weekend?"
"No, I've got to rest up this shoulder injury."
"Hey, want to go paintballing?"
"Shoulder injury."
"Why are you late for class?"
"Shoulder injury."
5. Know-it-allWhen people can't tell if you're a war veteran or a 12-year old with a credit card, it's easy to pass yourself off as a chemistry major who somehow specializes not only in advanced biogenetics, but also the composition of music and the secret techniques of ninja assasination. While more seasoned veterans of the internet are able to identify and isolate such cases, newer members are easily fooled. In real life though, 10 minutes of fame is probably not worth it when a real chemistry professor questions you about your supposed "field" in front of the girls you've been entertaining, who happen to be ninja composers.
6. Obvious statementsUnless you're writing a tutorial, textbook, or a teacher of some sort, if you find yourself saying completely obvious statements in place of an actual opinion or attempting to start conversations in the following manner:
A is cleaning a table.
B: "Hey, are you cleaning a table?"
A: "I just made some pasta, but I think the sauce came out wrong."
C: "Oh yeah, did you put in the thickener?"
A: "Thickener? Like what?"
B: "Thickener is stuff that thickens your sauce."
Please stop it.
Edit:
Thanks Virex & Tack
7. Lack of substance"So, you know, I was going to the mall and there were like, these shoes and they were like, too big and I couldn't wear them, so I didn't buy them and put them back on the shelf but I really wanted that pair so I asked the salesgirl like, and omigawd she had like the worst hat on evar, but anyway, I asked her if she had like, those shoes in my size and she said she'd checked and I was like, omigawd I hope they have it and she said like, they didn't, so I couldn't buy them but I said thanks anyway."