Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Author Topic: Dwarven Excrement  (Read 677 times)

Overspeculated

  • Bay Watcher
  • euklid on pth
    • View Profile
Dwarven Excrement
« on: October 18, 2009, 01:05:07 pm »
Dwarves never go to the toilet. The only thing that dwarves expel from their bodies are little dwarves.
Conclusion: Babies are made of dwarven "waste".

Now I know why dwarves love mud! They are mud!
Logged

slink

  • Bay Watcher
  • Crazy Cat Dwarf
    • View Profile
    • Slink's Burrow Online
Re: Dwarven Excrement
« Reply #1 on: October 18, 2009, 01:25:15 pm »
Only female Dwarves expel babies.  If your theory is true, then that means male Dwarves are all full of it.   :D
Logged
There is only one cat, and all cats are that cat.
Almost losing is sometimes fun.

Julius Clonkus

  • Bay Watcher
  • [NIGHTMARE_FETISHIST]
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarven Excrement
« Reply #2 on: October 18, 2009, 01:53:15 pm »
Even though it's not realistic for dwarves not needing to take a dump, I'd rather not see half my population with a "Wait for free toilet" job. Or fifty toilets spread through my fortress. Seriously.
Logged
Quote from: Christes on December 12, 2009, 02:35:20 am
Holy schist, this thread is mica me sick.
Quote from: Greiger on August 18, 2010, 11:20:45 pm
DF Players never truly leave.  They just abandon the fortress for a few years and then reclaim.

slink

  • Bay Watcher
  • Crazy Cat Dwarf
    • View Profile
    • Slink's Burrow Online
Re: Dwarven Excrement
« Reply #3 on: October 18, 2009, 02:26:48 pm »
Or have them failing to get there in time because "as the crow flies" pathing makes them go to the toilet many, many steps further away "as the Dwarf walks" than the actual closest one, followed by a bad thought and some stagnant water.  I think someone already wrote a game like that.   :P
Logged
There is only one cat, and all cats are that cat.
Almost losing is sometimes fun.

Skorpion

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarven Excrement
« Reply #4 on: October 18, 2009, 02:37:31 pm »
My theory is that dwarves have very efficient metabolisms, and excrete by way of vomiting. They know that sunlight means outside, so it's not going to mess the fort up when they throw up.
Logged
The *large serrated steel disk* strikes the Raven in the head, tearing apart the muscle, shattering the skull, and tearing apart the brain!
A tendon in the skull has been torn!
The Raven has been knocked unconcious!

Elves do it in trees. Humans do it in wooden structures. Dwarves? Dwarves do it underground. With magma.

Jetsquirrel

  • Bay Watcher
  • In the end, i will win.
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarven Excrement
« Reply #5 on: October 18, 2009, 02:40:35 pm »
Dwarven logic
inside = house
Outside = toilet
Elves = toilet paper
Logged