10th Slate, 207, Mid-Spring
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"Ew, get it away!"
"Augh, stupid cave swallowman!"
"Save the children!!"
I walk into the clothing industry area and notice a commotion.
"Hey, what's all this about? Something about a cave swallowman?"
Cog Zocoldomas, dyer, threw his cave spider silk thread to the ground. "There's a cave swallowman here!"
I hefted my (Steel battle axe) over my shoulder. "Well, well! Where is it? I'll cleave its head clean off!"
"Over there," pointed the craftsdwarf ThĪkut Ninurkol. "We can't get our work done with it around!"
I walk over towards the wall where the assorted crafters were pointing. "Where? I don't see it."
Udil Vucaradil, Farmer, shouted "I's on th o'er side o' th' wall! I's 'orrible!!" Udil held her baby Mebzuth Febiden high in the air. "Take m' babe an' keep 'r safe!!"
"Whaaaat?!"
The jeweler īton Munčstlorbam interpreted "She said it's on the other side of the wall, and you should take her baby to make sure she stays safe."
"On the other-- are you kidding me?! That cave swallowman can't reach us! You aren't in any danger!"
"Oh, no Zon, we aren't worried about it attacking us," said ThĪkut. "That cave swallowman is committing a depraved act! It's whispering naughty words through a crack in the wall!"
"...Seriously. You've learned to speak their language?"
All four dwarves shuffled their feet awkwardly. Mebzuth the baby chewed on Udil's beard. "Well... not exactly," said Cog, "but if we could, we're sure it would be talking dirty to us!"
"Moi babe d'n't need t' b' 'earin' such bad sp'ch! She gon' gro' 'p t' b' th' l'g'n'd'ries' conv'rs'tion'list ev'r!"
"...Ok, really, Udil, maybe you should let the father Urvad Dodókäkil raise her if you want her to 'grow up to be the legendariest conversationalist ever.'"
"Wow, you understood her that time? I sure didn't..." īton furrowed his brow.
I take a peek through the crack, and see the beady eye of the cave swallowman Melbil Matchedhammers peeking back at me. He started scratching at the wall and clucking and chirping.
"Well, I don't know what it's saying, but you're right in a way. That sound is
awful."What should we do, Zon?" asked ThĪkut.
I thought a while, then smirked. "Oh, I have an idea. You'll just have to wait and see."
Actually, this experience has given me two ideas. The workers are clearly easy to upset... sure they're ecstatic now, but I begin thinking of the distant future. Some day, these halls will be filled with consorts giving demands, and at some point we won't be able to accomodate them all. Rioting will erupt, and soon everyone will be at each other's throats.
I begin a secret project... This must also be kept secret from the king. I'm hesitant to write about it now. Perhaps I'll wait and let the res
ults reveal themselves as the pr
oject unfolds...
'Scuse m
e, bumped into another snatcher with my axe. N
ow where was I...
I forgot to make pipes for the exercise room, so I ask for several more of those. Freaking Tekkud the Tax Collector jumps on the bandwagon and asks for two more trifle pewter items. Seriously, this guy is more work than the count consort! More goblets, coming up... while they're at it, I see that the smelters are used to create more trifle pewter bars. The way this guy goes along demanding things made of them, we're bound to run out!
Imush the blind peasant makes a valiant effort at operating the pump, but can't seem the find the handles and decides to sleep on it instead. Poor Imush... he was a pretty decent marksdwarf when he had eyes.
"Cave swallowman! Yargh!!"
Asob Momuzzokun is yelling about the cave swallowmen too? Ugh, what-- oh!
One of them actually did get inside! It must have got in through the weaver's access into the bottomless pit. Asob charges him, but Tekkud Usirudil the legendary stonecrafter reaches him first and kills it. Asob goes back to smelting, a new job she's opted to take on. Meanwhile, I decide it's time to start mining out the granite layers for cassiterite. We're going to need tin if we're going to make trifle pewter, and right now we don't have any source of it.
Oh, wait... found it! Hmmm... further inspection shows that there's a patch cropping out of the bottomless pit, too. Looks like we'll be good as soon as we tap into those veins!
Nomal Ibelurist reports a rare gem cluster containing both lapis lazuli and red flash opal! Now that's interesting... I've never seen two gems so close together before! I wonder if this is a sign from Logem, the god of minerals and jewels...
"Speaking of that," Asob interrupts.
"Asob! Are you reading over my shoulder again?"
"That, and I'm practicing my ambusher skill. Pretty good, huh?"
"Pretty good... for a broker."
"Har, har. Speaking of that, um, you should stop that science experiment where you keep having Dodók's kid intentionally cave in things. He's getting mad."
"But Asob, don't you see? I created matter! What if I could do that with adamantine?!"
"Actually, you just knocked down the rocks on the upper level. Take a look at your map sketches and observe the 10 loose stones between the two sections from what I can only assume was originally a wall that was then deconstructed. Come to think of it, I think I even helped deconstruct that wall!"
"Eh? No, but... but... stone... blocks..."
"Zon, I know you struggle with this, but you can't force it. Give it time. What makes you so doubtful, anyway?"
"Hum, let's see... Goblins killed my cat and my boyfriend, a giant bat killed six migrants before coming after me--"
"But you were dubious even before we made this trip out here. Surely, it must be something--"
"Something no one will ever know, and we'll leave it at that."
"...I see. Just remember, out of the entire fort, you and I are tied for most friends!"
"Most? I only have six friends..."
"Zon, 80% of the dwarves here have
no friends. Most are lucky to have even one. The only dwarves in this entire fortress to have three or more friends are the King and the original seven who embarked here."
"...Oh... have I really kept everyone that busy?"
"There's a lot to do around here, I don't blame you."
"I kind of do."
"Well, at least you have your kick-ass underground island crypt!"
"...Um, had. There was kind of an accident."
Asob shook her head. "You work yourself too hard. I always see you either fishing or chopping trees! Don't you ever get tired?"
I sigh. "Yes, I suppose... but there's walls to fortify, and booze to brew, and a river to find, and goblins to fight, and my secret proj--"
"Secret project? Oooh! Let's grab some wine and you can tell me all about it!"
"You and your strawberry wine... Somehow, Asob, that's really fitting for you."
"What's that supposed to mean?"