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[Aklyon]

Hey, this is still alive? cool.

[The Architect]

This is the first time I've looked at this thread, or the forums at all, since posting that comment here. Magic bump sense indeed!

Funny, I quit coming to the forums when I got a girlfriend. Now I'm back because boredom has a place in my life again. TMI? Probably. I didn't have the time to do any of my usual time-wasting activities like this with her around. Kind of miss this, but I think I miss that more.

Anyway, point being: if real life comes along you're fully justified in walking away from things like this. But when you have some time, we do enjoy sharing your literary adventures.

[KenboCalrissian]

I can honestly say the worst cause of my hesitation is how slow the game progresses.  If I devote 50% of my weekly free time to it, I'm lucky if I've progressed through a whole season within a week.  That's 4 weeks per consort.

Maybe if the whole HFS collapsing thing totally FUBARs, that problem will go away when the population takes a sharp and half-expected decrease.

[Argonnek]

It is often necessary to cull the herds. Especially if an awesome story like this one is threatened by FPS death.

[The Architect]

Ah, I feel your pain.

Spoiler: a little rantish (click to show/hide)

DF's current slow running time is why I haven't touched it in months. I really enjoy the game when it's working, but playing it is getting to be a little bit of a headache for me. I wish for the ability to turn features I don't personally care about off, and more automated controls. It ought to be possible to set processes to run efficiently with standing orders.

Setting up something, fun. Endlessly micromanaging something that would function well with standing orders, not fun. So I guess it's a combination of the slow running time and the way the non-essentials like bugs and endless micromanaging eat time. Complexity would be fun if it ran rather quickly, and inversely a slow running time would not be so exasperating if it didn't take hours fixing a goofy glitch or mistake in slow-motion. I hate to be working on a massive tower, only to have to stop my construction designations to reset sand-gathering orders or food production every 200 cycles.

[KenboCalrissian]

File 0.28.181.40d, Royal Archives 2002-2008

The Fall of Zursalbalad (Severedcoils)
and the Reign of King Minkot Zanegamkol

HIGHLY CLASSIFIED
-------------

Contents:
Event log/Personal diary, shared by Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam, Clerk, and Asob Momuzzokun, Mayor: 1 (one)
Written accusation by Unib Tunrithlut regarding the actions taking place at Severedcoils, as well as the whereabouts of His Highness King Minkot Zanegamkol: 1 (one)
Eyewitness accounts of conversation between Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam, Clerk, and Obok Zirilkivish, Mayor of Koganokil (Boattest) which took place at the Hairy Beakdog: 5 (five)
Various pieces of physical evidence recovered from the fortress:
(Steel Battleaxe) belonging to Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam
€cave spider silk tunic€ belonging to Asob Momuzzokun
(≡«-Iron flail-»≡) belonging to 'Archibold' Saziralåth Maskirdetes Zan, Champion Macedwarf
Isakodom, "Spatterbasin," a Rhodolite hatch cover
118 other artifacts, parcels of clothing, and particularly shiny rocks

-------------

Written accusation by Unib Tunrithlut:

I, Unib Doorwax, hereby put forth that Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam, Asob Momuzzokun, all members of their organization "The Crypt of Crowns," and all the workers and residents of Severedcoils have committed acts of treason, of depravity, of murder most foul, and of harboring Minkot Zanegamkol, the "Fugitive King."  I hereby put forth that Obok Zirilkivish, Mayor of Boattest, the nearest dwarven establishment to Severedcoils, played part as a liaison and accomplice to these crimes.

Amongst the fallen of the city of Severedcoils, the bodies of Rith Likotâtast, Duke, Tholtig Sarámedëm, Count, and Lolor Ekastathel, Duke remain undiscovered.  Murmurrings from the peasants of Severedcoils indicate one victim was incinerated by an elaborate trap made of magma.  No word has surfaced about the other two, but I've taken the liberty of shadowing Zon during her daily activities while waiting for her to treat with me about trade goods - on more than one occasion, I have witnessed a peculiar contraption suspended in the middle of a bottomless pit.  This device consists of a narrow walkway leading to a lever suspended over the pit.  A door separates the lever from the edge of the pit.  Though incredibly dark, I have spotted Isakodom, "Spatterbasin," a Rhodolite hatch cover artifact at the roof of the chasm from afar.  All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality.  It is decorated with turtle shell and mountain goat leather and encircled with bands of Basalt.  On the item is an image of narrow crescents in Rhodolite.  On the item is an image of diamonds in Rhodolite.  This hatch cover is positioned directly over the lever.

I have not the heart to test my theory for fear of my life, but I highly suspect the lever is connected to this hatch, and both are connected to the disappearances of the Count and Dukes.

Likewise, I have spotted a certain peasant on the premises who closely bears resemblance to Minkot Reliccounsel.  He wears a x(Pig tail dress)x, XX(giant cave spider silk toga)XX, mismatching shoes of x(hoary marmot leather)x and X*cave spider silk*X, and, like all other dwarves in the fortress, is covered from head to toe in blood and vomit.  I once approached this pungent peasant, and he immediately became incredibly nervous.  He told me his name was "Minkerruhbob," but the resemblance to our Fugitive King is uncanny.

I beseech the Court of the King to look into this matter with prompt haste.  Minkot has no heirs and no wife, leaving the entire Realm of the Swift Arches in peril of becoming leaderless.  I will not allow this to happen - if Minkot cannot be recovered, then by royal law and with the council's consent I will dutifully take the post as Regent and lead in his absence, and accept the burden of the realm upon my own shoulders.

May justice be served, soon enough that we may avoid this fell fate.

[KenboCalrissian]

6th Opal, 210, Mid-Winter
-------------

The wailing of the demons is unbearable.  Glad I'm not mining right over their heads!  Several of the miners are having trouble sleeping, but soon, it'll all be over.  The "demon-smasher," as I've now dubbed it, is nearing completion.  It should be ready just in time for a special guest to do the honors of Pulling The Lever.

Several rooms are not as covered with holes as I like, so I remind our engravers to get to work on the new chambers and tomb being created for our duke-en-route.  While I'm at it, the fallout shelters for Asob and me are looking quite drab, so I order those engraved too.

Nickel sarcophogi and Iron statues are being forged for the future tomb.  Though... I'm noticing a problem.  We're badly lacking iron, and we haven't had a siege in a while to provide us with more.  There's an iron ore vein right near the entrance to the fort, but our diggers are all very busy.  We'll just hold out for now... At least we have plenty of ugly nickel statues we can melt and reforge!

Reg Erushtirist, Duchess Consort, makes herself useful and demands three shields.  I decide to test our armorsmiths and allow them to work with steel for this task.  Meanwhile, King Meeknuts is demanding a door in his bedroom.  Be patient, my liege, I've had one specially crafted just for you...  Hope you like sleeping next to pitchblende.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Chaoseed]

Not just an update, but a PLOT TWIST!

[Aklyon]

Not just an update, but a PLOT TWIST!

And its not dead, either!

[KenboCalrissian]

And its not dead, either!

How long does a thread need to be dead before res'ing it makes it undead?

The zombie Severedcoils grapples with you!
Your left eye is broken!
Your right eye is broken!

Yes, I'm still rocking good ol' 40d.  Though FPS hasn't improved any, I'm going to give this another solid attempt.  Expect smaller updates (as there's far less happening per session due to sluggishness), but I will try to compensate for that with a side-storyline.

To be perfectly honest, I'm sort of expecting the story to end abruptly when the Big Tent comes down around the clowns, but we shall see.  Basically, the success or failure of that plan will determine whether or not I upgrade to the latest version of DF

[Aklyon]

Long enough that everyone forgot about it, probably.

[Dermonster]

Wasn't this the one where I went with the eye-gougingly cliche communist dwarf or something? Then I went some type of insane I think...

[KenboCalrissian]

That is correct sir.  I should add some more story elements involving dorf'd dwarves...

[KenboCalrissian]

22nd Opal, 210, Mid-Winter
-------------


'Di' was proving to be a nuisance as a hauler, what with constantly falling unconscious.  She dropped a stack of +Dwarven sugar roast+ and let it spoil on the ground, filling the halls with miasma!  I've limited her hauling duties to rocks and furniture, and also conscript her as an Engraver.  This seems like a fitting position for one who is missing both eyes and prone to narcolepsy.

We ran out of nickel bars, and only managed 13 statues.  This doesn't seem like an efficient way to train our metal crafters with what we have.  I could've sworn we had a lot more nickel... oh, wait.  We do!  The hallway leading to my tomb is lined with nickel statues of base quality.  I forgot about those... I'm not too partial to them, and suppose somebody enters a mood and really needs nickel.  I slate each one for removal and order them melted down, so they can be re-forged into better statues.  I've commissioned  thirty iron short swords as well for the sake of training our weaponsmiths.

Now that I'm thinking about moods... Hm, I must check our stocks... Blast, we're down to just two bars of copper and silver each!  This will not do.  I search all known walls for sources of these metals... There's plenty of copper veins, and a few veins of silver I can find deep in our chasm.  We do have a tetrahedrite vein... the best we can do is hope for a good yield of silver out of that, and then just not touch any of it.  I order much of this to be mined, though... again, I'm faced with delaying the 'Big Tent' project, but an insane dwarf is a more immediate threat than the horrors trapped in their adamantine prison.

A new vein of adamantine has been discovered near the chamber of the 'Big Tent.'  This will inevitably delay the project a bit, as it's in a spot where it will become inaccessible later.  Or... well, actually, let's just put a wall in front of it so we can get at it from the other side, then we can reach it whenever we please.

[KenboCalrissian]

File 0.28.181.40d, Royal Archives 2002-2008: The Fall of Zursalbalad (Severedcoils)
Testimony by Ingish Olonalåth, Miner, delivered to Unib Tunrithlut
on 6th Obsidian, 210, Late Winter,
several Urists North of the border of Zursalbalad proper.

Attached: Form U-V, Profile of Ingish Olonalåth, Miner: 1 (one)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This transcript contains conversation between 2 (two) people: Unib Tunrithlut (referred to as "U:") and Ingish Olonalåth (referred to as "I:")

U: Please state your name and occupation.

I: My name is Ingish Gearedbolts.  Olonalåth.  I am a dedicated miner and a general hauler of goods at Severedcoils.

U: How long have you been in attendance at Severedcoils?

I: Oh, I can't even recall... There's so much work to do, I couldn't even tell you whether I came last year, or was in the original traveling party!

U: So, you would say Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam is overworking you?  The populace?

I: Overworking??  Not at all, we're clearly underworked!  I had time to take a break last month, what'dya call that!  On the surface it seems there isn't ever a single idler - well, except for 'Di,' that lazy lout uses her lack of eyes as an excuse to slack off.

U: Ah... yes.  How is 'Di,' after all?  I had heard she was given special accomodations due to her needs as a blind dwarf.

I: Well... I should watch what I say, but... can I be candid and sincere in my dealings with you?

U: Of course you may.

I: Well, to me, Zon's treatment of 'Di' is a disgrace.  'Di' gets this nice, big room all to herself deep within the mines, separated from most dwarven contact.  She's got her own stockpiles of food, booze, and even bolts and a target range so she can shoot in her room whenever she wants!  And she's got these vents in the walls constantly spewing smoke and keeping her warm through the winter.  Now, I understand, being totally blind and prone to falling over and knocking herself out, 'Di' requires... certain accomodations.  I can understand sticking her far down the stairwell in a chamber by herself, but why does she get all these amenities?  Most of us have tiny, 1x2 urist closets, just the way we like 'em.  No dwarf should need that much stuff and so much space all to herself.

U: Smoke... coming through vents?  Is 'Di's' room located near the magma vent?

I: No, it's by the... ahh...

U: By the...?

I: <Ingish has grown incredibly nervous with this line of questioning.  He looks over his shoulder as if followed.  Zursalbalad and the sounds of its industry are safely in the distance.> You must excuse me, I'd rather not say.  I mean... nobody knows for sure, really.  It's merely speculation.

U: Just what has been speculated?  Tell me.

I: I'm sorry, no.  You said we were to speak of Zon, not of... of smoke coming through a few holes in a wall.  <Ingish switches quickly from nervous caution to assertive stubbornness.  I am forced to choose a new line of questioning.>

U: Very well.  Zon, my dear old friend.  How is she these days?

I: <Ingish pauses a long time with a distant look on his face.  He is clearly troubled.> Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam has been ecstatic lately.  She ate a pretty decent meal lately.  She dined in a legendary dining room recently--

U: <I cut him off.> --As have you all.  Severedcoils is renowned for its legendary dining halls.  Have you filled out the Form U-V Profile like I asked you to construct?

I: Yes, I'm reading it to you now.  Zon Rimtaroth--

U: That is alright, you can just give that to me.

<Ingish hesitates, but eventually relinquishes the requested information to me.  I take a moment to look it over.>

Attached: Form U-V, Profile of Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam, Clerk: 1 (one)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

U: Very thorough.  Not entirely out of the ordinary for one who lost her lover so soon after coupling... hm.  She admires her own fine Seat?

I: She's quite proud of it, actually.

U: Perhaps you should have added that she is narcissistic.

I: No, that wouldn't do.  Despite that quirk, Zon hardly finds joy in anything at all, least of all herself.  The closest she comes to smiling is when she's fishing, only...

U: Only?

I: <Ingish sighs, and relinquishes to me a sketch.  This was not asked of him, it was created on his own accord.>

Attached: Sketch of Ingish Olonalåth and Zon Rimtarothil Afentumam at the Severedcoils Brook: 1 (one)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

U: Are those...

I: Fish.  And bones.  Quite a number of them... of the live ones, there are three rainbow trout and seven char... the bones... three char, nine trout.

U: Fish... bones?  Well, surely... she must be eating the fish?

I: I don't think so... the bones looked as though the fish rotted clean off of them.  She's been fishing in that spot so long that the fish she caught weeks ago have decayed right before her eyes, and she doesn't seem to even notice or care.  Occasionally she counts them, along with whatever's alive that hasn't already been brought back to the fortress by a hauler.  And then she curses, and mutters to herself... but I can hear her clearly.  She says, "Not enough, Asmel."  That's usually the only bit that's intelligible.

U: Asmel... Could she mean Asmel Sensedye?

I: I don't know who that could be.

U: Nevermind... I will attempt to confirm the identity of this Asmel myself.

I: There's another... thing she did recently that I find disturbing.  The guard dogs we had in front of the fortress to sniff out marauding kobolds?  Well... She had them replaced.  With wolves.

U: Tame wolves?

I: Yes.

U: What's the matter with that?

I: I thought you wanted a psychological profile on Zon... That doesn't strike you as odd?

U: What strikes me as odd is that she didn't do this sooner.  Muttering to herself over weeks-old fish is certainly cause for concern.  Upgrading the fortress defenses to tamed wolves?  That's a mark of a true leader right there.  A bold move, one that could only be pulled off by one capable of catching and taming dangerous creatures.  She probably did this either for status or to keep the ranks in line.  I can abide this.

I: Ha... I doubt that's it.  You haven't seen her release a flock of giant eagles upon a goblin siege.

U: Hoo hoo!  What a funny joke.  The beasts of the sky cannot be tamed, let alone captured... can they?

I: ...You haven't seen her release a flock of giant eagles upon a goblin siege.

U: ...If... you are serious...

I: I know, mark of a bold leader, right?

U: No!  I mean, yes.  I mean... that is... why, such an action would be both bold AND insane!

<I end the interview here, for now.  At this time, I am not yet ready to risk a direct inquiry about the missing Dukes.  Should Zon find out about this secret meeting, I know not as of yet how she might react.  For now, if she were to find out the sorts of questions I've asked, my hope is that she would take it as genuine concern for her well-being.  I must disguise my purpose for the safety of this investigation... as well as myself.>