17th Hematite, 207, Early Summer (evening)
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"You need to be more careful, Zon. What are you doing making such powerful enemies??"
"Nevermind that... There are far worse threats lurking below us than the King."
"You mean..."
"Adamantine."
I gulp down the rest of my dwarven wine, which was more than half of the +Alunite mug.+ Asob fidgets with her -Birchen cup,- having barely sipped her strawberry wine.
"Zon... is there really something lurking behind those walls?"
"Oh, believe me... there is. And as greed overtakes this fort, and as moods continue to drive crafters to wanting more, we'll get closer. I've seen it once before. Very few of us abandoned the fortress in time. The rest..."
"Oh my..."
"I was traumatized by the things I had seen. Somehow, after years of hydrotherapy--"
"You mean, having someone dunk you repeatedly underwater?"
"...Yes, that... somehow I've managed to... repress those memories. But it cost me my faith... after what I had witnessed - whatever it was - I... just haven't had the same trust in the gods."
"You mean you don't remember what you saw??"
"I remember blood... lots of blood, and death, and screaming. And...
no! Don't make me recall it..."
"Alright, alright! Um, let's talk about something else then! So what are these arrangements you were talking about?"
"The arrangements! Right. They're almost complete, actually. You've probably noticed a modification to your dining room recently..."
"Not really, no. I've been sleeping in my old 1x2 and eating in the main dining hall. For old time's sake."
"What? Why would you do that?"
"Um, because the sound of all that
construction you have going on right beneath me is too noisy?"
"Oh... sorry. Well, you're going to love what I've been doing down there! Come on."
We venture to Asob's dining room. My dining room contains the same modifications, but I start with hers.
"The hardest spot was picking the right spot for the hatch. Every square urist in this room is engraved, and I didn't want to ruin any! But I noticed the engravers haven't touched the rock beneath your table and chair, so I moved the chair aside to put in a hatch."
"A hatch? Well, where does it go?"
"I'm glad you asked!"
"Wow! Is this what I think it is?"
"Yep! Secret bunkers, built right into our dining rooms. If things get too dicey, we just hide out in our own private rooms and wait it out. There will be stockpiles of food and booze, masterpiece furniture to keep us happy, and the entryway will be secured with a retracting bridge over a small pit!"
"What if we fall into the pit?"
"I'm going to drop a pick inside each one. That way, if we or anyone else we think is safe to keep falls in, we'll allow them to dig themselves out!"
"And, um... why do the rooms have to be separate?"
"Well... look, above all else, I'm fearing a tantrum spiral. Some day, theoretically there will be too many consort demands for us to keep up with, and the whole place will break into a riot. Many of our friends could be killed, and... well, I don't want us to hurt each other if we go mad."
"Aw! That's thoughtful. But we shouldn't be the only ones with these bunkers. You need to build several individual bunkers for important workers, like miners and farmers."
"Yes, in due time. Look, Fikod Rigňthishen is digging the pit right at this very moment!"
"Crud."
Knowing I'm likely to forget later, I shoot a hurried order for Fikod to build a bridge across the gap so that he and Nomal Ibelurist the Engraver can get back across. I race upstairs and take a look at the field of battle.
"Wow... two squads to the west, and one north, south, and east of us-- they came from all sides."
The goblins have come in nearly double the force of the siege of Autumn 205. There are seventy-one invaders total as opposed to the last siege's forty-one... There isn't time to count every single rank. I hurriedly recruit some of the workers. There are plenty of obsidian swords by now, so I give them those. I keep the recruits inside the gate, protecting the caravan. We needn't waste their lives unless absolutely necessary.
Archibold, just recently out of bed from his injury, runs up to me as if his leg was never broken. "Zon Rimtarothil! Humans are reported amongst the enemy again!"
"What did you call me?"
"Err... Zon Rimtarothil
Afentumam. I thought you were never truly attached to that name...?"
"Nevermind, it isn't important at the moment. Somehow, I knew we weren't done seeing humans amongst the goblins, but this is the first time they've appeared during a siege - and hey, would you look at that, they've come while the humans of Pesor Siti are here trading with us. What a coincidence."
"Dodók Cloisterinches the Geared Guile of Waving says that they all come from Smoszmzolak, 'The Released Sins.' I say I'm running out of space to put notches on my (≡«-Iron flail-»≡)!
((DFMA)) ((Movie)) "Then make some room on your Steel high boot! Just get out there and bring me some goblin bones!!"There's a lull in the fighting. Enough time to count bodies... Five dead on our side, including three champions... oh, no... thirty-eight other corpses, but this includes dogs and goblins. Twenty-one invaders still on the loose, again not counting the six we now have caged. Many, many injured on our side. Reports indicate the goblins are still coming.
"Everyone regroup! Here come the rest of them!!"
We wait for quite some time. Another puppy trap is set off by a group of mostly speargobs and lashers. We watch them come very close to the gate, stall a moment, and then change their mind and turn around.
((DFMA)) ((Movie)) Archibold screams. "Don't let them retreat! Show them no mercy!!"Enraged with battle vigor, and glee for their hard-fought victory, the militia come back hooting and hollering.
"Aah, if only there were more goblins to kill!" 'Other Grendus' laughs.
"Oh, but there are. The birds have been eyeing them up hungrily for quite some time now..."
The militia grin and nod in understanding.
((DFMA)) ((Movie)) Once and for all, Olngö Dospoem Tokxemösmlo Smaxa, goblin axe lord and local leader, is put out of our misery. Only four major players remain amongst The Released Sins - their ruler, two high priests, and one with the peculiar rank of "Goblin."
"So, Archibold," Asob inquires, "how many kills are you up to?" I find this surprising, considering her writings about Archibold before. Perhaps she's had a change of heart?
"Fifty-six notable kills and seven rhesus macaques... Included are both local leaders of The Released Sins."
"Hm? You don't sound as enthusiastic about it as you used to."
"Yeah, well..." Archibold solemnly wiped some guts off of Kobembetan, 'Troubledcalm,' the grizzly bear leather buckler. "When I hit fifty, I kind of realized that it quit being fun somewhere around thirty-five. I mean, there are only so many ways you can snap a tibia... splattering goblin brains in a brilliant spray of purple and grey matter just doesn't have the same thrill as it did the first time, y'know?"
"Oh, no! You're not thinking of retiring, are you?"
"I couldn't. I have a reputation to live up to, people who aspire to fight like me. I'm an inspiration from the fortress, and for once I'm not trying to be an arse about it. A fortress needs heroes to drive others to become heroes themselves."
"Well... in that case, you'd better go back to playing the crowd!"
"Ah... yes, yes, that part never does get old! Fifty-six, everybody!! Who's gonna top that?! I'll tell ya! Nobody! Hahaha!! Round of drinks for everybody! Meet ya in the statue garden - let's try to get that grizzly bear drunk again!"
In celebration, the workers re-elect Asob Momuzzokun as mayor of Severedcoils! This calls for a round of dwarven-- err, make that strawberry wine! Oh, wait... they're already getting rounds. Well, whatever, I'll take two then.
((Commentary))
((Yes, the siege's timing really was that inconvenient. There wasn't more than a quarter of a second between the miner opening the pit and the siege being announced!))