Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[KenboCalrissian]

15th Opal, 201, Mid-Winter
-------------

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I had a horrible time sleeping last night.  Unib took over Urdim's bedroom to wait in while I slept.  Apparently, she needed time to finalize some documents and have me sign off on The Swift Arches' requests of us.  I don't think she slept at all... in fact, she came in several times through the night to ask if I was done sleeping.  What is with this girl?!

I wake up, order the miners to widen the main entrance in preparation for my defense plans, and pick up my axe to do some chopping. 

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

A bowyer's shop is created on the craft level, along with stockpiles for ammo, weapons, and armor.  Meanwhile, I make use of the leather shops I had constructed below and request two full sets of leather armor to be made.  I make sure to leave a few rolls of leather in case one of us becomes possessed or something.

Another thought occurs... Eventually, we're going to find that magma pipe, and when we do we're going to need power for some pumps later on.  I have our miners dig up a few more levels and create a gear room near the surface.  It's little more than an empty room with a hole in it for now, but I plan on creating a network of windmills pushing power down a few central axles.  The first of these - a proof of concept, if you will - will be used to power a mill or two in the room next to the bowyer's shop.

Unib is still following me... Fine, I've had it.  I drop my axe with a clatter, hold out my hands for the documents, and look them over.  Apparently they want shields and earrings, and a few other things.  I sign the documents and hand them back to her.

"It's been fun, Zon!"  Unib patted her papers down on the floor to straighten them out.  "Ah, if only I had more time to follow you around and watch you work.  You're fascinating, you know that?"

"Um.  Yeah.  Well, hey, before you know it, next year will be here... you'll be back... and I'll get to lose a little more of my mind!"

Unib cocked her head, then laughed.  "Oh!  I thought you were serious there for a second!  It seems my poor sense of humor is rubbing off on you, hoo hoo!"

"Joking.  Yeah, sure.  Don't get eaten by Azinnietoes, or whatever the hell you called it."

"Azinidos.  You know, Zon, it's very important to give your enemy a name.  It drives you to vengeance."

"Vengeance isn't always a good thing..."

"It is when it expedites the death of a dangerous animal!  Don't dawdle, giant bats are no laughing matter!"

"Ah.  Well... Bye."

Unib hugged me without warning.  Sighing, I patted her on the back, then watched her leave.  Finally she was gone.  Her words, though, got me thinking.  It's time to get some weapons and take out that winged rodent.

[KenboCalrissian]

It's 1st Granite, year 202!  Let's see our progress so far...

[martinuzz]

Whee! That's a lot of updates in no time.
Very promising, still liking it!

[KenboCalrissian]

4th Granite, 202, Early Spring
-------------

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

That toga-snatching sonovabitch is going down.  Crossbows are made, I have my axe handy...

But then, a thought occurs.  No... Death in battle is too good for this hellion.  Why waste the potential?  I know how I can put that monster to good use, and then I'll dispose of it later.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I just have to catch it first.  Classic puppy-chained-behind-a-cage-trap - a tempting snack too easy to pass up.  Bat swoops in, cage comes down, we poke it with many sticks, toss it in a dungeon, maybe feed it our enemies, life is good.  I discourage the dwarves from naming the puppy.

While that project simmers, I instruct the miners to carve a few lines into the rock between our industry level and our quarters.  I need to find that magma pipe, and I'd prefer that we struck it from the top rather than the bottom.  I have a strong feeling that it's on either the far eastern or western side of our boundaries.

-------------
7th Slate, 202, Mid-Spring.
-------------

Some elves came a little while ago.  I didn't think it was important enough to write about at the time, I just got a bin of cloth, some seeds, and a groundhog.  Why a groundhog?  I don't know, in case we need something to butcher later on, but that shouldn't be a problem since we have so many puppies to spare I used one to bait a trap... which is still empty, by the way.  I think I need to set up a few more of those.

That's not why I'm writing, though.  More migrants have arrived, and hopefully these ones don't run into trouble on the way... in fact, let me grab my axe real quick and I'll escort them.

...aaaand wow, twenty-one migrants, and every single one made it into the fort.  Splendid!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

"A'scuse me," a child at the back of the group came up to me.  "Are you Zon?"

"Why, yes I am!  What a cute young fellow you are!  What's your name?"

"Uhh... My name is Ineth.  Sorry, I dun talk to strangers."

I blinked.  "But... but you came to talk to me."

"Ooooooohhh.  That a'splains it..."

Actually, that didn't seem to explain anything to the poor child, as he chewed on a finger and stared perplexedly at a passing toad.  I rolled my eyes and was about to head back to the fort, when I noticed something in Ineth's hand.  It bore the seal of the Swift Arches.

"Excuse me, but is that for me?"

"Huh?  Oh... oh ya!  That's why I talked to you.  Here you go, pretty lady!"

Ineth handed me the scroll in his hand, then skipped along merrily behind the group.  I read it on my way back to the fort, but cringed when I realized who had sent it.

Dearest Zon,

How are you?  It's me, your estranged sister Unib!  Or at least that's how it feels, hoo hoo!  Don't you miss all those adventures we had?  Remember the time you chopped down that tree and left the log on the ground for someone else to pick up?  That was so dwarfy of you, hoo hoo!

I told Obok you were having a wonderful time out here, but could use a hand keeping up with the place.  He said that figures, but he didn't answer me when I asked him what math had to do with it.  He thought you'd enjoy having plenty of fishers at your fort, so he sent along plenty of dwarves from the fish market you used to work at to keep you company!  After all, you need some competition out there if you truly want to keep your title as regional fisherchamp!!

Here is a rundown of the dwarves I've sent:  1 Animal Trainer, 1 Butcher, 1 Carpenter, 2 Children--

"Oh for Armok's sake, the poor twit listed them alphabetically," I muttered.

2 Farmers, 1 Fish Cleaner, 1 Fish Dissector (ew, gross!), 1 Fisherdwarf, 1 Fishery Worker, 1 Furnace Operator, 1 Hunter, 4 Peasants, 1 Planter, 2 Weaponsmiths, and 1 Woodcrafter.  I hope they suit you well, and I can't wait to see you again in the autumn!

Love you like the sister I had, but lost to a tragic magma incident,

Unib Tunrithlut, your favorite liaison to the Mountainhomes!

P.S.: How's Azinodos Kezkíg Zoluth doing?  I thought I'd improve its name for you in case you haven't taken care of it yet.  Did you know that in Human, that translates to "Watchcalls the Connection of Combating?  Obok said he'd send his hammerer if you can't deal with it yourself.  Isn't that sweet of him?  Have you fed it lately?

I crumpled the note, threw it on the ground in disgust, then pressed it into the mud with my boot.  Then I tore off my leather armor and threw it to the ground as well.  Predictably, my new peasants are clamoring for the armor pieces to put them back in the bin where they belong.  Typical.

As I walked to the nearest tree to chop, something in my mind wasn't sitting right.  I was ecstatic to have so many new arrivals, so what was wrong?  Some of them could even help me out with that bat... like the new Hunter, for example!  I wonder where I could find him... or her, I haven't even met any of these newcomers yet!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[LegoLord]

Heh.  Hunter.  Good luck getting one of those to help without drafting.

[quinnr]

Nice, you should turn this into a book.

[KenboCalrissian]

27th Slate, 202, Mid-Spring
-------------

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

"Zon!"

"Asmel."

"C'mere and look at this char I caught!  It's HUGE!!"

I glanced briefly at the raw char in Asmel's hand.  The side of my mouth twitched.  "That's one of the fish that I brought with me last year.  You caught that fish out of a barrel."

"Yeah, but it's bigger 'n any fish you caught around here!"

"In my first week I caught twelve turtles.  Twelve.  Go look in the stockpiles and see how many are there now.  There are ninety-three turtles in those barrels."

"Last I checked a turtle i'n't a fish."

"Fine, then look at the rainbow trout and the shad."

"'T'ain't much to look at."

I gritted my teeth as Asmel laughed.  Obok must have known of the rivalry between her and me.  I've never figured out what I had done to slight her.  Asmel was just always like this, constantly trying to outdo me and get on my nerves.  Others say she's compassionate, but I've never seen that side of her.  You know what her favorite thing to say was?  'Our company has a wide range of fisherdwarves from Asmel to Zon - and that's not alphabetical, that's in order of skill.'  Or 'A comes before Z, so ask Asmel first and Zon last!'  Oh, Asmel... if only you were a Baron.  I've got a nice bottomless pit for you to inspect...

"So I hear you're claiming yourself regional fisherchamp here in these wastes, too?  Sheesh, talk about pride."

"Actually, I've given up on fishing.  I'm a woodcutter now."

"A woodcutter?  HA!!  I bet you're just intimidated because mayor Obok sent all the pro fishers out to this dump."

I chucked my steel axe into the ground, the blade catching hold in the dirt so that the handle stayed at the ready.  "Fine, Asmel.  You're here to catch some fish?  Go catch some damn fish, then.  I hope you get eaten by a carp!"

"Carp are too good for this trash pile, Zon!  Hahahaha!!!"

I turn, grab my axe, heft it just a wee bit too close to Asmel's face, and walk back towards the fort.  I need a nice, tall mug of dwarven ale-- Oh, that's right... Asob traded the last of our mugs to the elves.  Glorious.  Guess I have to strain it out of my beard.

"Hey, Zon!  Look!"

"Asmel, for the love of Armok, lay off already!!  I don't want to look at your stupid fish!"

"No, look up!!"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It happened.  Azinodos found the entrance to the stronghold.  It swoops straight for Asmel.  She screams and starts to run.  I holler for the peasants I just recently assigned as Marksdwarves - by recently, I mean right before my conversation with Asmel.  I don't think they've even picked up their gear yet...

Asmel tries to circle around Azinodos, but it cuts her off.  It catches her head in its powerful jaws and crunches as it slashes at her body with its powerful wings.  Somehow, she struggles free before it kills her, but her head is horrifyingly misshapen, her skull broken by the giant bat, and her right arm and upper body are gashed... She's running away from the fort.  I've seen this five times before, and they never get away.

"Asmel, don't run - fight!!  Wrestle it if you have to!"

I didn't really mean it when I said I hoped she was eaten by a carp... Armok knows I'd never truly wish death upon a fellow dwarf, even one I hate as much as Asmel.  I know she's already gone... but damn it, I can't bear to watch her die running away.

((DFMA)) ((Movie))No more messing around... This is personal now.

[KenboCalrissian]

Nice, you should turn this into a book.

Actually, I'm working on a sci-fi novel when I'm not playing DF.  So, yeah, that accounts for the long posts 

[KenboCalrissian]

27th Slate, 202 - Aftermath
-------------

I'll never forget that sight.  That horrible thing, turning from a calf it had just killed and locking eyes with me, screeching that terrible sound.  It flew straight at me like it had just escaped hell, claws raised, and I just... swung.  I timed it just right, I swung my axe straight down, I caught its head with the blade and knocked it to the ground.  It bounced and rolled over and over, coming to a stop, and just... just made this ugly, awful wailing sound as it tried to crawl away on its broken wings.  But no, Azinodos... You've killed too many of my kind to forgive.  I put it out of its misery with one more slice - not for its sake, but for our safety in knowing Azinodos is gone for good.

The giant bat is dead.  I killed it.  I... with my axe, dripping with blood.  Vengeance is served... and my fellow dwarves are safe.  Unib's words ring again in my ear...

"You know, Zon, it's very important to give your enemy a name.  It drives you to vengeance... It is good when it expedites the death of a dangerous animal!"

I let my axe fall to the floor.  The recruits stand uneasily behind me.

"You... go... Go shoot at the targets over there... It looks like they were just finished.  And get this woman into a casket."

"We don't have any caskets..."  I don't even know who said it.  My ears were buzzing with the heat of my first kill - an extremely dangerous first kill, at that.

"Then make six, top priority.  Go get the hunter, too.  We're creating a tomb to those who fell to this beast."

"What about the bat?"

I narrowed my eyes at the disgusting creature.  A smirk betrays me as I bemusedly think of the plans I had for that thing once I caught it.  Even tamed, it wouldn't be safe to set free around the other dwarves, but it could have been loosed inside the bottomless pit.  No doubt it would have killed every living thing inside within half a month.  A new plan is in order, then. 

"I want its hide."

Spoiler: "OOC" (click to show/hide)

It's worth noting that this bat was such an efficient killer that 3 out of the 6 dwarves it killed don't have any thoughts about sustaining injuries - this thing brought instant death in 50% of its dwarven victims.  The screenshot of Asmel's character bio was in fact taken after her death.

[Firnagzen]

Hrng. You have a title for your novel yet? I'd keep an eye out for it, if the quality is anything like your writing here.

[KenboCalrissian]

Hrng. You have a title for your novel yet? I'd keep an eye out for it, if the quality is anything like your writing here.

It's called Krythe.  I'm maybe halfway finished with it, just having a little trouble keeping motivated with writing it at the moment.  Actually, this challenge is turning out to be an excellent writing exercise for me, so hopefully I'll get moving on it!

[KenboCalrissian]

4th Limestone, 202, Early Autumn
-------------

Summer came and went without incident.  The elves didn't even bother to show up, that's how boring it was.  Just as well, all they did last year was sit in the depot and smoke their rope reed for a month.  Stunk up the whole fort, it did.  I've started counting our stocks... It's taking me a while, and Asob keeps telling me if I stay down here all summer I'll grow plump helmets from my ears!  I suppose it's time to take a little break and document our progress.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

A crypt has been carved for those who fell to Azinodos.  Remarkably, we found the remains of every dwarf that was taken by that flying monstrosity... Even if all we could find were bones, it put the others at ease knowing that they had a good place to rest.  I'd like to have the room smoothed and engraved, but... well... from what I understand about barons, they hate it when the working class gets ritzy burial arrangements.  I think even this is pushing it, but as long as we don't formally call it a crypt we should be fine.  And anyway, by my patron god Kovest they deserve it.  Some of the others have reported seeing Tun's and Asmel's ghosts in there, but I'm sure they don't mean us any harm.

Speaking of Azinodos... I canceled my orders to make leather armor from its hide.  Why?  Simple.  The leatherworkers... they just aren't experienced enough to make a good quality suit.  So, I've forbidden its hide until the workers gain a little more experience.  I've done the same with the meat, until the cooks get a little more experience under their belt.  Azinodos is an important part of our history, and I don't want this messed up.  I already missed the bones, no idea where those got to...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Asob's right, by Armok.  The first year has been rough for us all.  I'm trying to lighten up on the orders to let everyone relax a little bit.  I've found a cat that actually loves plump helmet wine as much as I do, if you can imagine that, so I've adopted him and named him Sĺkzul Zaskab, or "Crystalnames."  Isn't he cute?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Oh, and... oh dear, I'm blushing... I'm currently seeing Ast, an adept grower and competent brewer.  Ast was one of the original seven who started this expedition with me, our farmer.  Would you believe he smuggled one of our last mugs from the elves just before they left, and then brought it to me full of plump helmet wine?  He's such a sweetheart!  He also likes to admire my fine seat, the devil!

Ahem... excuse me, I need to keep this professional.  More on progress!

We've moved the masonry and carpentry workshops deeper inside to make more room for food.  We've almost filled the first stock pile already!  We also found some bituminous coal, sitting right out in the open.  This is great!  We can get a head start on our glass and metal industries until we find that magma pipe.

Speaking of which... We've been digging a lot on the eastern side on level -4, but no signs of magma yet.  Maybe I'll start a few more levels down for the next attempt.

The puppy traps haven't caught anything yet... yes, there's two now.  I guess wild animals don't find puppies tasty?  Weird, I thought everyone loved the taste of barrel-aged puppywurst.

At this point, a random pickaxe flew into the room and landed on my table.  The pickaxe was covered in blood.  In walks Asob with a big snarky grin on her beard.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

"Guess what?  I mined you some batman bones.  It came down out of the sky, almost like Azinodos!  And there was Bujit Quispeptamed, and he was all like--"

"Bujit Quispawhaaaaaaat??"

"I know!!  Humans have such funny names, right?  And he was all 'Aaaaahh!!' and I was all "Raauuugh!!" and I killed it with that pick!"

We both laughed easily.  Asob was still somewhat reserved and tended to avoid crowds, but in this room she felt at home.  Even though batmen really aren't much of a threat on their own, I felt the need to encourage her out of her shell for others.  After all, she is the town broker!

"Oh!  I need to get back to that guild representative.  I think I left him waiting outside.  Seeya later, Zon!"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: "OOC" (click to show/hide)

Ah, the classic recruit-meeting bug.  The broker is still engaged in a meeting with the human diplomat, but was recruited.  Her symbol on the game screen remains a trader, but the Units screen shows her as a Recruit who is Conducting a Meeting.  Pretty common bug, worth explaining since it's a somewhat frequent occurrence.

[KenboCalrissian]

14th Limestone, 202, Early Autumn
-------------

How very frustrating... A little while ago, Fikod brought to my attention that way back in Spring, he noticed a kobold running off with a stack of steel bolts.  Considering we don't have steel bolts, this only could have come from the human caravan!  Why hadn't Asob told me of this?  Either she didn't notice, or was afraid I would be angry... but if that were the case, she should understand that I would be more angry for not being told!  I may need to question her on this on some later date.

This was actually brought to my attention some time over the summer, so I had two war dogs chained to the entrance to intercept any other thieves.  I also helped them construct some walls and a roof around the dogs to give them some protection from arrows.  It's not much, but it will keep them alive a bit longer.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The problem, however, is that stupid boulder I failed to spot earlier!  The dwarven caravan tried to come just now, and because the boulder blocks their path to the depot, they turned their wagons around and left.  This is horrible!  As such, I'm re-planning the path.  We can't afford mistakes like this...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

We also had our first mood today and took over a masonry shop.  He's already begun construction... it's not much, it only involves two rocks and a piece of leather.  Ah well.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

"Thief!  Thief!!"  I heard Medtob Elleststâkud call out.  Soon, another was reported-- two thieves?  I wonder how many more there could be... Medtob tackled and quickly disposed of the kobold he spotted, but it looks like the other will escape.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Obok finished his artifact - a statue valued at 9000 dwarfbucks.  "The Rose of Friendship..."  Ah, Obok, if only you knew of the 'accidents' that need to be arranged here in the future.  This place wasn't meant to be friendly...  Anyway, this looks like a good statue to put in the dining room of a widowed consort later, so we'll keep this safe for now.

A third thief bumped into a donkey and was chased down by Bomrek Tatineth, one of the two weaponsmiths.  It almost got away, too; it made it all the way to the edge of our boundary, but Bomrek grabbed it by the collar and pinned it down for good.  Honestly, they carry daggers but they seem to hardly use them!  These little pests are humorous, at best.

Speaking of humorous... what's gotten into the laborers?  They're giving random resident batmen names??  I quickly check the records for any deaths, and see that the batmen aren't titled, just... Are we now consorting with these batmen?  I shake my head and return to my counting.

[quinnr]

I'm still reading! It's great!

[KenboCalrissian]

14th Moonstone, 202, Early Winter.
-------------

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

îton Dastototin, our new sheriff, got his new rooms kitted out.  Likot and Tholtig, Animal Caretaker and Furnace Operator respectively, are smoothing his room in their spare time.

Meanwhile, I've so much time in this pen that is my office that I've officially donned the garb of the Clerk.  It's just as well... I mean, so far I've served this fortress as a fisherdwarf, a woodcutter, an axedwarf defending the citizens from the giant bat menace, giving orders, and taking stock.  Over time I've learned to take comfort in numbers.

"Oh, is this your journal?  Can I read it?  What have you written about your new beaux?"

"Unib, stop it!"  I yank the fortress logs away as she tries to grab for them.  "Can't you see I'm busy?"

"Yes, you're counting!  I can help too!  One, two, three, four..."

"Stopitstopitstopit-- ....No, you've made me lose count again!!"

In walks Oddom, one of our weaponsmiths.  He has some startling news for me.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I spat out my dwarven wine, creating a plump helmet-scented Mist that my company found pleasing - but only for a moment.  "You what?!" I bellowed.

"Oh, hey, y'know, it's like I said.  A goblin snatcher bumped into me, y'know?"

"Did you, y'know, try to catch it??"

"Oh, hey, well, y'know, I chased him for a little while, but he was pretty fast, y'know?  He got down the hill an' I decided, y'know, to hell with it!  He's gone, y'know?"

"He's not gone, he's going back to where he came from so he can try again later!  What if he took one of the kids??"

"Well, he didn't."

"He might next year!  Or next season, even!  Oddom, you couldn't chase him downhill?!"

"Oh, well, y'know, hey, once he got goin' there was no stoppin' him, y'know?  'Sides, I decided I needed a drink, y'know?"

"Oddom... you've met Asob, right?  The fortress broker?  Last month she took down a batman by herself.  Saved the human diplomat from soiling himself, she did.  You are a weaponsmith, and you can't chase a goblin more than a few yards?"

"Hey, y'know, I just make the weapons, I don't use 'em..."

"..."

".....y'know?"

Unib and I looked at each other.  Clearly, we were in agreement.  "Oddom," I said, "I have some new orders for you.  They're very specific.  Do you think you can pull through?"

"Oh, well, y'know, hey, gee, I dunno, how specific are they?"

"Very specific... but simple.  You ready for it?"

"Oh, y'know, gee, hey, yeah, well--"

"Go and shave your beard."

Oddom stared at me uncomprehendingly.  His face turned as red as a wild strawberry as he looked between Unib and me, both of us staring resolutely back at him.

"You want me... to... y'know... shave the beard?"

"Both of them," Unib frowned.  "Cowards don't have a right to them."

Defeated, dejected, and heartbroken, Oddom slumped his shoulders and sulked out of the office.  After he left, I pounded my fist on the arm of my chair.

"He's a weaponsmith!  You'd think he'd at least know how to fight!"

"Doesn't he ever test the tools of his trade?"  Unib crossed her arms.

I picked up my new pet kitty, Geshud Mistęmmebzuth, and scratched her behind the ears.  I love Sĺkzul so much that I just had to get him a mate!  And then they'll have kittens!  Oh how I love cats for their aloofness.  "That's not what upsets me, Unib!  A goblin was sighted in the area!  Mayor Obok assured me there weren't any goblins in this area!  He even showed me these documents to prove it!"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Unib shook her head and put a hand on my shoulder.  "Um, you do realize the -------- beside the goblin means they are present and violent towards you right?  If the word 'goblin' isn't there at all is when they aren't present."

"Eh??  I thought the red dashes meant there were no goblins!  You know, like a 'Do not enter' sign!'"

"Oh, is THAT why there are little red dashes carved into the door to your kitchens?"

"Trust me, those signs are for your own good... unless you like watching puppies being butchered.  Mmmm, puppywurst..."

Unib gave me a shocked look and backed away from me.  Hmm... maybe I'm wrong about eating puppies?

"Oh, stop, I was only joking."  I lied, but if I had to deal with Unib following me around for another season then I'd prefer she didn't do it horrified of me.

"Oh... haha!  You had me going there, Zon."

Hours later, I received disturbing reports about Oddom... The workers are saying he's sitting in the trade depot, mumbling incoherently in a fey tongue... Oh dear, have my words sent him into a mood?  He hasn't claimed a workshop yet, but... oh, drat, he's a weaponsmith!  We don't yet have a metalworking shop... Or an anvil... And it's the middle of winter!  There's nothing else to do but to order the guards take a perimeter around him and wait for the inevitable...

Spoiler: "OOC" (click to show/hide)

Total coincidence that Oddom entered a mood I can't possibly fulfill for him after what I wrote for him in this post.  Many story events are based on things that have already happened by the time I start writing, but this time it really was a coincidence that happened after the post had started!