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[scriver]

I had an anxiety attack in the shower on Monday. The reason was stupid and inane and super mundane, but that didn't stop it from happening. Objectively I understood it was stupid and inane and super mundane, but that sure didn't stop my brain from spiraling down the shower drain.

I've been way anxious all week since then, and my medication does not seem to be effectively alleviating that. The pills look correct, so it doesn't seem like the pharmacy bungled something. There's nothing especially unusual or stressful on my mind, brain's just screaming. And screaming. And screaming.

And screaming.

Anxiety attacks often happen at strange times, it's often when the cup is unlidded and we're vulnerable that a drop can spill the wine.

But about the second paragraph. Please contact your doctor and tell them about this and how stressed you are -- even take it to a general practitioner if you can't get an appointment asap.

[None]

I've left a message with a nurse to have the doctor call me back so I can discuss either upping my dose or changing my prescription (or just getting it renewed, since I'm out of refills). Otherwise I've got a telehealth meeting booked, uh, two weeks from now, since that's the best they could do under the current timeframe.

Or maybe I go find someone local, I dunno.

[MrRoboto75]

Feels like I can't exist 5 minutes without somebody being judgemental about some bullshit or another I'm doing.  Endless endless whining.  Work is miserable but I'll never pass the required social vibe check to get anything else.

Coworkers in a different department won't do their job correctly and instead lie to guest and make my job harder because I'm the job stress ball.

Idiot at Wednesday clix makes at least one comment about how robotic I am or whatever atypical shit is pestering him.  Nobody else in the group cares, and I am supposed to take this in jest but it hurts all the same.

Heroclix in general, they changed some of the core rules (again) and frankly the entire game's fucked.  And the power creep is so extreme the game gets decided by about turn 2, and the non rotating formats are more or less dead.  Feels like I spend hours cooking a team just to get tabled in ten minutes.  I've spent some 7 years and thousands of figures on this game and in about 2 years it's perverted into honest misery.

[Egan_BW]

Would you be willing to be f****d in the a**e by an unspecified number (but >=2) of unsympathetic strangers to save a life?

For the purposes of this exercise the unsympathetic strangers are all Russian and all are named Vasily

A life? Obviously not. Many things are alive and most of them are irrelevant to my life.
In fact as a weed-puller my job mainly revolves around killing things just trying to live their lives in peace.

[JoshuaFH]

I'm constantly stressed and worried over my Little Sister and my niece (her daughter). From like the very moment my Sister become a teen, she's been aloof, stubborn, and ignorant; constantly tied to her phone and utterly refuses to do simple chores around her home and absolutely won't communicate her thoughts/feelings to me in any way, despite me being there for her for her entire life... She's 22 now and she's still the same way, but now she has a daughter, and her little apartment is squalid and she's still remains fixated on whatever stupid thing she's doing when there's obviously a lot of work to be done in terms of household upkeep and monitoring her daughter.

I want to help out when I can, but her home is very possibly infested with bed bugs or fleas or something, and I'm mortified of carrying them back to my own apartment. Just visiting for the little while I did today makes my skin crawl, my paranoia is in full force and I can't stop feeling like there's bugs on my skin. I put the clothing I was wearing into the freezer, google says that bed bugs can't survive freezing temps after four days, so if my clothes were carrying anything despite my obsessive rubbing and inspection, maybe that'll do the trick.

I just want my Sis to fucking grow up already, but she's always blaming her mental illness for why she's so unmotivated to do anything around her own home, or giving a stupid excuse like my own home isn't spotless, so why am I criticizing, when obviously that doesn't matter at all, and she just doesn't want to do anything. She was such a cute, lovable little sister as a child; but what a fucking incorrigible, stupid bitch she's become. My niece is slightly less than 2 years old, but I'm worried that she'll develop an overly-independent, antisocial personality due to her main role model being so lazy and ignorant.

Before you ask, of course there's no father. She apparently thought it was a good idea to just get knocked up for the fun of it I guess? There was no parental planning or preparation, she just decided to do it, just because I guess? I have to say "I guess?" because she won't ever tell me what she's fucking thinking or feeling. The boyfriend skipped to another state (with her OK... I guess?) and now that she's in dire straits she has to fight to get him to actually pay child support.

I'm just always so disgusted with her, and I don't know what to do. Trying to get something like CPS involved would no doubt make my family hate me forever; but on the other hand, I feel like it's just a matter of time before something seriously bad happens to my niece and the source will of course be from my Sister's neglectful attitude. I feel like I have to get seriously angry with her, but that'll just cause her to clam up and shut me out even more. I have no clue what to do.

[dragdeler]

i neeeeeed to hand in my paper on monday. give me the strength to bypass reason and give up on the best opportunity to earn money I ever had, it's kinda sad but I hate see it like that. it must be done, my opinion of our visitors is irreperably damaged

[Great Order]

The more exposure to transphobia I get the more bitter and sarcastic I become, I swear.

It's fucking hard to avoid too, unless I seriously want to limit who and what I interact with.

[Laterigrade]

I was going to say that I broke up with my partner, and that made me sad, but this thread has made me sadder still.

[delphonso]

I was going to say that I broke up with my partner, and that made me sad, but this thread has made me sadder still.

Hang in there Laterigrade.

[Great Order]

After spending ages trying to get a single mod installed for Fallout 4, I've come to the conclusion that the Vortex Mod Manager is, in a word, fucked.

It didn't install the mod despite claiming it was installed and enabled, so I tried a different version of the mod. It hanged on installing. Tried redownloading the mod, tried redownloading VMM, tried a new game, tried reloading the current game (Neither of those last ones should have been an issue, it should be noted, it's a graphical mod that can be added halfway through a game).

So yeah, the VMM just seems to be fucked. I'll have to do a manual install after several hours of trying to get it to fucking work.

[bloop_bleep]

...

Completely separate from the heavy stuff, but just washing your clothes on hot water setting will kill all bedbugs.

[nenjin]

I know the feels of wanting to help someone who doesn’t want help. (And also getting involved in someone else’s filth.) It sucks that they’re possibly dragging an innocent down with them. But you gotta remember Josh, you can’t destroy yourself to save them. At some point, you have to do what’s right by you. The best thing I think you can do is call child protective services. That’s the best help you can give that kid.

[dragdeler]

I've come to the conclusion that the Vortex Mod Manager is, in a word, fucked.

A quick glance confirmed that thrash to be sitting on my desktop, LOOT too. I didnt want to use mod organizer because that sounded like it would be less search engine optimized but in the end it was the right call for me.



I halfway felt like taking out the VR glasses earlier, but even on normal days thats cumbersome, and I should just do my injured foot a favor and sit on my ass.

[Great Order]

Made a mistake on a video.

You know when you start viewing something and you know it's going to be bad but can't stop watching?

Yeah, saw a video of an accident where someone got killed in a very unpleasant manner. I'd hesitate to say it'll affect me forever because I know this sort of thing filters into my memories where it stops bothering me, but I know I'm not going to forget it.

[hector13]

There is a morbidity to human curiousity that can lead to things like that.

I watched the video of the guy plowing into the crowd of protesters at Charlottesville a few years back, and I was a little shocked at my wholly unexpected response being horror and despair given how much violent media I’ve been exposed to in my life.

I mean it was kind of heartening to realize I have a soul and that I’m able to tell the difference between entertaining fictional violence and horrific real violence, but also realizing that there are people in the world that have such hate in their hearts that they’re willing to brutalize people over a matter of opinion… kinda sucked.

Anyway, that kinda came out of nowhere heh. Hopefully you forget it soon.