I'm constantly stressed and worried over my Little Sister and my niece (her daughter). From like the very moment my Sister become a teen, she's been aloof, stubborn, and ignorant; constantly tied to her phone and utterly refuses to do simple chores around her home and absolutely won't communicate her thoughts/feelings to me in any way, despite me being there for her for her entire life... She's 22 now and she's still the same way, but now she has a daughter, and her little apartment is squalid and she's still remains fixated on whatever stupid thing she's doing when there's obviously a lot of work to be done in terms of household upkeep and monitoring her daughter.
I want to help out when I can, but her home is very possibly infested with bed bugs or fleas or something, and I'm mortified of carrying them back to my own apartment. Just visiting for the little while I did today makes my skin crawl, my paranoia is in full force and I can't stop feeling like there's bugs on my skin. I put the clothing I was wearing into the freezer, google says that bed bugs can't survive freezing temps after four days, so if my clothes were carrying anything despite my obsessive rubbing and inspection, maybe that'll do the trick.
I just want my Sis to fucking grow up already, but she's always blaming her mental illness for why she's so unmotivated to do anything around her own home, or giving a stupid excuse like my own home isn't spotless, so why am I criticizing, when obviously that doesn't matter at all, and she just doesn't want to do anything. She was such a cute, lovable little sister as a child; but what a fucking incorrigible, stupid bitch she's become. My niece is slightly less than 2 years old, but I'm worried that she'll develop an overly-independent, antisocial personality due to her main role model being so lazy and ignorant.
Before you ask, of course there's no father. She apparently thought it was a good idea to just get knocked up for the fun of it I guess? There was no parental planning or preparation, she just decided to do it, just because I guess? I have to say "I guess?" because she won't ever tell me what she's fucking thinking or feeling. The boyfriend skipped to another state (with her OK... I guess?) and now that she's in dire straits she has to fight to get him to actually pay child support.
I'm just always so disgusted with her, and I don't know what to do. Trying to get something like CPS involved would no doubt make my family hate me forever; but on the other hand, I feel like it's just a matter of time before something seriously bad happens to my niece and the source will of course be from my Sister's neglectful attitude. I feel like I have to get seriously angry with her, but that'll just cause her to clam up and shut me out even more. I have no clue what to do.