Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[MaxTheFox]

I am so worried when someone disappears off the face of the main community we share. And then I look for them on other social media, seeing them silent there too. And then, in the worst case, one of their accounts has a suicide note. That is my nightmare.

[LordBaal]

In his case he had cancer, for some years now.

[dragdeler]

a

[ChairmanPoo]

If he logs back in at some point he might not be cheered up by speculating about this. Just saying...

[martinuzz]

If he logs back in at some point he might not be cheered up by speculating about this. Just saying...

+1.
There's a reason that in most countries, a missing person cannot be declared dead until years have passed, amongst other reasons not to create awkward situations.

Hope he's ok.

[dragdeler]

a

[Vector]

my brain is melting

[Egan_BW]

I recommend snacks and drinks. Hot chocolate is good for this season supposing you're in the northern hemisphere.

[TD1]

My personal solution to head melting: The gym.

Not to everyone's tastes, though!

[ChairmanPoo]

My personal solution is prevention. Don't look at the Ark

[TD1]

But it's very hard to Nazi it 

[King Zultan]

Those so called top men must not be that good if that thing keeps coming open all the time.

[LordBaal]

Did he stop answering that abruptly? There is a chance he is not answering because he is in intensive care, not that that would be much better, besides it's speculation. In any case he deserved much better... Don't want to put words in his mouth but I feel like his IRL peebs gave him a giant scoop of neglect once the outcome was more or less clear.  heartbreaking

Indeed that happened. He told me that once his situation worsened people close to him basically vanished. Keep talking to him for like the last 2 years via PM's here. Some months ago he spent a week and some in intensive care and stoped replying, that is peharps the other time you mention I was worried. But this time is different, and its well over a month now.

Why the fuck someone would stop being friend of someone else because that person is dying? Unless is from a zombie plague there is no excuse man. I dont joke when I say lots of you here are considered friends by me.

Do hope he someday logs back and say "had a several months intensive care visit but Im better now", but the reallity is most likely very different.

[Frumple]

Why the fuck someone would stop being friend of someone else because that person is dying? Unless is from a zombie plague there is no excuse man. I dont joke when I say lots of you here are considered friends by me.

Stress, mostly. Least from what I've seen in my life. Like, I haven't done it, but there's been days I've very seriously considered just fucking off to the other end of the country and leaving my grandparents (different situations, being old age and dementia and me the primary caretaker instead of just a friend, but still, their clock is very clearly ticking down) behind for other people to deal with, because trying to handle everything involved is pretty literally killing me (started blood pressure medication last night, haha!).

Sometimes when all the shit piles up and you don't really know what the fuck to do, folks will cut ties with what they're troubled by instead of figuring out other ways to deal with it, even if it means basically leaving a friend in a ditch. It sucks and it's generally a pretty shitty thing to do, but, like... I get it, y'know? I understand how someone can do it. When you're buried by everything else and got the extra shit sandwich of having friends or family die on you it's really fucking tempting to just... not. You'd probably feel a bit bad in some ways but in others it'd be such a goddamn relief, out of sight and out of mind, etc.

[martinuzz]

I can see they've been posting every other day on just about all their socials.

Fair enough. You did not provide that information in your first post.

Nice try.

Not sure what you think I 'tried'? I am not judging you in any way.

Anyhow. You might be taking this too personally. Don't assume the worst. It could very well be that your friend does not reply to you pouring out your heart because he is in a 'I don't know what to say' mindset. People can blank out you know.

Also consider that people don't always have the energy to cope wih someone else's problems is they are occupied with things in their own life.
That is not malice, that is inability.

Yeah, that's what I also tried to explain to him last month, and he took it very well.