Weird family situation:
I am an adult and thankfully pretty independent from my parents. I have a home, car, and phone that has nothing to do with them. They have tons of drama and what little connection I have with them has them dragging me back into that.
My mom and dad are older, and they were quite abusive and the family is pretty broken up. We don't talk much at all. 90% of us cannot see each other or even spend holidays together. I do come around to see my parents, but not a whole lot. I guess dad has been having some memory problems. He's over 70. Sometimes he has what I am calling word finding difficulty (he does not remember what things are called sometimes), remembering the name of some things. I've been told a doctor said he can still drive, etc.
My parents seem to have known about this memory situation for a year and told me nothing. My one older adult sister, seems to have been filled in, between her hitting them up for money. My mom knows of and seems to be ok with her doing this. Whatever. It's just odd, and I'm slightly worried she's exploiting them a bit. I was kept in the dark on all of this, and she seems to keep getting "loans," and one of my parents seems to be having memory issues. Also I told my dad not to make her the executor of his will and have his lawyer do it instead. I just flat out told him "I'm getting sick of saying I told you so," because guess what, she's the executor on the will. Only like, weeks ago did I get any information on my dad's medical condition. I didn't ask for any of it either....
My dad calls me a few minutes ago, says he's seeing a physician tomorrow. He did not make the appointment. He does not know if it is a psychologist, neurologist, or whatever, but he seems nervous/irritable. When explaining why, he states it is because he has been inside and unable to go anywhere from COVID for a year. Before, he always kept busy and active dealing with various car things. COVID basically killed that off. My mother is, frankly, untrustworthy. My dad has repeatedly talked of leaving her, and she him. This lovely scenario is possibly coming to a head, because dad seems to think she's trying to gain more control over money. She's been keeping the books for them, but frankly, she's done a bad job of that in the past.
Again, I have been told nothing about this until very recently. I have no idea what to tell dad. He is worried about speaking with the physicians concerning his memory issues. I do not know how severe things are. Last week I was told by my mom and dad that he was ok in the memory department, and a CT did not show anything bad.
So, dramatic, abusive family gives conflicting result information (memory problems and BAD, then switches to "not so bad"), and its always fun to be thrown into a possible divorce situation (Assuming he's not just talking again, or even could/would leave her). I know there aren't any lawyers here (T seems to be pretty gone and I can't seem to get her to come back), and I don't think that'd work out anyhow.
What the hell do I do emotionally, and otherwise to process this?
Mom and sister are possibly being sneaky, and/or stupid? Possible financial exploitation? Possible inappropriate influence? Possible real memory issues with dad vs. he's stressed like hell from quarantining through COVID. All of this with possibility of their divorce (seems they've talked about this a couple times over the last year).
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9792161 times)