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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9786087 times)

Eschar

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118410 on: June 21, 2020, 03:46:08 pm »

Three of my friends have now left to pursue their post high school paths. I will probably not see them for quite a while.
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McTraveller

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118411 on: June 21, 2020, 03:53:35 pm »

Saw a really sweet car this morning (a Mustang, I believe) and all I could think was how nice it'd be to have it drive over my head.   

I'm choosing to interpret this to mean you are thinking of this as a sweet flying car.
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Il Palazzo

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118412 on: June 21, 2020, 04:06:06 pm »

I think he just really, really likes standing under bridges.
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118413 on: June 21, 2020, 06:24:41 pm »

The best "math persons" I personally know are woman. One in fact is a math and calculus university teacher and the other is a fucking genius. Its certanly stupid to rate anyone capacity on maths besides well, their capacity in maths.

My own sad is that... well, dunno, have this sinking feeling my wife is going to ask me for divorce. We do get along pretty well and haven had any important argument or figth lately but its something in her eyes. I have 15+ years knowing her, and well... it terribly sucks because I love her completely and fall for her everyday, but its rather evident she doesnt feel the same for me now, not in a long time. I got to told myself, well, its the horrible crisis we are now, if things get better it will improve.

We got better food wise thanfully but relationwise... I have made all my efforts to be more lovely and open towards her like befor all this crap, but she now seemed repulsed, weirded or palled somehow.

Oh well, that's life. Maybe she wont ask for a divorce because of peter.

That's terrible to hear, Baal :(


@Vector: It's weird to think that people like you, who are talented, hard working, accomplished, and all around amazing get impostor syndrome. I guess it's not really a rational thing, though.

Isn't the more amazing you are, the more likely you are to get impostor syndrome? Because being more amazing leaves more room for thinking you aren't as amazing as you are, and being less amazing leaves more room for dunning-krugering yourself about how amazing you are
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Love, scriver~

Reelya

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118414 on: June 21, 2020, 07:10:54 pm »

The history of imposter syndrome is a bit sketchy in terms of scholarship, mainly because the original study on the matter was by two clinical psychologists who studied 150 women, and then made a statement (lacking data to back it up) that it was something specific to women. That really means the conclusion everyone took away from the study was in fact baked right into the study as their core assumption going into it, invalidating that conclusion. That's kind of a red flag in terms of research right there.

Since then nobody's basically been able to replicate that finding, with equal numbers of follow up studies showing a propensity for imposter syndrome for women, men, or neither gender. At this point I'd just say it's a general human thing and probably linked to Dunning-Kruger at the high end of the scale as Scriver suggested.

https://digest.bps.org.uk/2018/06/01/a-new-study-claims-that-under-pressure-imposter-syndrome-hits-men-harder-than-women/
https://qz.com/1296783/it-turns-out-men-not-women-suffer-more-from-imposter-syndrome/

So, yeah imposter syndrome is totally a real thing, it's just that the original main claim that gets cited (that it's specific to women, and that the study showed this) entirely derives from a sketchy bit of research which has a huge amount of circular reasoning in how they set the study up. It's kind of hard to claim a study found a difference between men and women when no men were in fact included in the study, on the basis that they weren't relevant due to the stated gender difference.
« Last Edit: June 21, 2020, 08:35:01 pm by Reelya »
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118415 on: June 21, 2020, 07:21:02 pm »

Saw a really sweet car this morning (a Mustang, I believe) and all I could think was how nice it'd be to have it drive over my head.   

I'm choosing to interpret this to mean you are thinking of this as a sweet flying car.
Me too, man. Me too.   
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Booze is Life for Yoink

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you need to reconsider your life
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Uthimienure

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118416 on: June 21, 2020, 08:24:48 pm »

My own sad is that... well, dunno, have this sinking feeling my wife is going to ask me for divorce. We do get along pretty well and haven had any important argument or figth lately but its something in her eyes. I have 15+ years knowing her, and well... it terribly sucks because I love her completely and fall for her everyday, but its rather evident she doesnt feel the same for me now, not in a long time. I got to told myself, well, its the horrible crisis we are now, if things get better it will improve.

We got better food wise thanfully but relationwise... I have made all my efforts to be more lovely and open towards her like befor all this crap, but she now seemed repulsed, weirded or palled somehow.

Oh well, that's life. Maybe she wont ask for a divorce because of peter.

I'm sorry to hear this. I had to go through divorce less than 2 years ago (25 years married) so I can empathize completely, it was the worst thing in my life. I keep thinking it's time to look for another, but something in me just still says "not yet". 

Just hopefully your sinking feeling is wrong and things will work out.
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dragdeler

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118417 on: June 21, 2020, 08:57:12 pm »

-
« Last Edit: November 23, 2020, 03:45:06 pm by dragdeler »
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Reelya

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118418 on: June 21, 2020, 09:36:35 pm »

Quote
imposter syndrome is a bit sketchy

Sorry but it's a bit unfair to slice my quote like that, or if that's your own thought on the matter then you should write that in your own voice and not phrase it as a quote of me, to avoid miscommunication.

I said the history of imposter syndrome was sketchy, not that imposter syndrome itself was sketchy. And I was referring to the methodology of the original study, where they loaded a lot of baggage on top of the concept due to how the study was arranged.

EDIT: However one thing I thought about that might be interesting is those studies they do where they give people random astrological birth charts (such as Hitler's) and tell them the traits, and people almost always go "wow I'm a Taurus and these Taurus traits on the list are spot on, this astrology stuff must be right". For pop-psychology, I'm kinda guessing it works about the same. If you list <common traits> that are general enough then attribute them to <people X>, and spice it with just the right amount of ideological appeal, then people go "wow, I'm a <people X> and I totally have <common traits>, this theory of yours really works". Basically the same mechanism that makes it seem like astrology charts are working. So just list a bunch of emotions or feelings that virtually anyone has, and wrap them in some clever-sounding theory that ascribes those traits to men, women, or whatever group, then give it a catchy name, and you can get people believing you came up with some profound discovery.
« Last Edit: June 21, 2020, 09:51:32 pm by Reelya »
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118419 on: June 21, 2020, 11:58:07 pm »

I mean, I go around feeling like an impostor all the time. But then again I likely dunnig-kreuger myself on a regular basis. Maybe I'm just insecure and hiding it behind a wall of false bravado ;)
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Love, scriver~

Eschar

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118420 on: June 22, 2020, 12:10:14 am »

See, at least I know I'm insecure and hiding it behind a wall of false bravado
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dragdeler

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118421 on: June 22, 2020, 05:27:08 am »

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« Last Edit: November 23, 2020, 03:45:10 pm by dragdeler »
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118422 on: June 22, 2020, 05:42:02 am »

My quick, easy method to avoiding impostor syndrome is to simply not have any efforts or accomplishments in your life worth feeling proud about in the first place. Do you... d'you think I could market this technique somehow, guys? Maybe it could be a follow-up to the first overly cynical self-help book I've long been thinking of writing.   
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

dragdeler

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118423 on: June 22, 2020, 06:06:10 am »

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« Last Edit: November 23, 2020, 03:45:17 pm by dragdeler »
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #118424 on: June 22, 2020, 09:44:06 am »

Socrates was a douchenut and should never be quoted. Fight me.


My quick, easy method to avoiding impostor syndrome is to simply not have any efforts or accomplishments in your life worth feeling proud about in the first place. Do you... d'you think I could market this technique somehow, guys? Maybe it could be a follow-up to the first overly cynical self-help book I've long been thinking of writing.   

Unfortunately I think a guy called Buddha already has that corner of the market covered
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Love, scriver~
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