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[ChairmanPoo]

Bear in mind that the ER only goes so far in what it can do. You're expected to be followed up in primary care once major things are ruled out. You're also supposed to go back to the ER if you actually get worse

[LordBaal]

ER just keeps you alive/relieve your pain, rule out mayor/fix immediate dangers and then either kick you to a hospital bed or home.

You probably were given orders to further analysis and tests or refered to a internist(that's how generic non specialist doctors are called here, this are the ones that see you first and then send you with the specialists, don't know how they are called there) or specialist to further find the cause of the pain.

[Grim Portent]

My grandmother is in the hospital at the moment, been there for a few days now. She got ill, stopped drinking, became confused and fell over in her home. Not the first time something like this has happened. Sometimes when she feels unwell she doesn't take her pills, eat or drink properly and it takes a while for her to recover. I hope these don't become too frequent, she'd go mad if she wasn't able to stay at her home anymore.

[Gentlefish]

The streets are at peace, food and shelter is readily available, you can make your own choices to push the boundaries of your fate.

I can't use 90% of that since I cannot get/hold a job.  There's no place for me.

Bullshit. You live in a house, clearly, you have food and you don't have brigands coming to rape and enslave you, which was most of history. You are in fact benefiting heavily from affordable peace, food and shelter. Complaining that you can't get a job in the worlds richest nation is in fact complaining that you're only in the top 10% of the world's wealthiest population, but you're upset that you can't find economic uses of your time that would push you into the top 5% of the world's population, because that's your birthright as a citizen. Most of the world works 60 hours a week for the equivalent of what you can buy for $2.

Then the truly desperate have things like polio, malaria, AIDS etc. Malaria alone kills half a million people a year. If you're in a house typing on a computer that's attached to the internet about how your station in life isn't good enough, because you can't find enough to do to make more money, then spare a thought for the vast majority of humanity for whom what you already have is a pipedream.

...Can I just say that "boohoo other people have it worse" is kind of a shitty way to try and pick someone up?
Like sure all of those statements are factual but since when has one-upping someone's depression gotten them to think "Oh yes look at all those shitty things. I'm better now, thank you for telling me I'm an idiot for being depressed since there's terrible things in the world and they're not happening to me"

[Trekkin]

...Can I just say that "boohoo other people have it worse" is kind of a shitty way to try and pick someone up?

Sure, but it's great for virtue signaling and getting to be self-righteously angry, and in the end isn't that what really matters?

[Reelya]

Sure, I over did it, but my point was to be grateful for what people actually have. MrRoboto75 is well off compared to world standard, and I'd even wager he's not that bad off compared to USA standards. Maybe my point didn't come across: but it's a "glass half empty / glass half full" situation. MrRoboto75 only ever sees the negatives of his situation not the positives.

Can't find a steady job isn't much of a burden, that describes plenty of people. At least he has a family to fall back on. I don't have a job either yet I don't have much in the way of family to help me out either. Having family willing to complain that you need to do more is more than a lot of people have. I'm here, no job, and no family I can fall back on when money's tight. My nearest family member is about 800 km away.

Sure, situation sucks but you make the best of it. Sure, it sucks having to live at home and being pressured by family to do more, but nobody really "has" to live at home: they live at home because they make a choice to rely on the resources the family provides. Being told what to do is part of the price for having access to those resources. You always have a choice to not rely on that: plenty of people don't have the choice in the first place.

[TD1]

I don't think Reelya's approach was too far out there. Robo's main problem seems to have little to do with his actual ability, and more his self image. "Boo hoo get your frickin' act together" would probably be something I'd say if he were family. For a stranger, perhaps it is too familiar.

[Il Palazzo]

I don't think Reelya's approach was too far out there. Robo's main problem seems to have little to do with his actual ability, and more his self image. "Boo hoo get your frickin' act together" would probably be something I'd say if he were family. For a stranger, perhaps it is too familiar.

Towards a person with depression, it's harmful.

[Reelya]

Also I'd like to point out my original statement wasn't an attack on MrRoboto75's original complaint, it was a direct response to his response to Caz's statement, so that's the context. I think Gentlefish and Trekkin aren't reading it in that context.

Caz had written:

"The streets are at peace, food and shelter is readily available, you can make your own choices to push the boundaries of your fate."

To which MrRoboto75 responded that none of that personally helped him.

My annoyance was at this specific claim, and only this claim. The Peace, Food and Shelter of modern western society hasn't personally benefited MrRoboto75 at all? It was this specific claim I was responding to, not his original complaint about work and family matters.

Peace: not being killed in the street, Food: not starving to death, Shelter: having a house to live in. MrRoboto claimed he didn't benefit from any of that.

I wasn't going "boohoo other people have it worse" out of context. I was pointing out that MrRoboto does in fact benefit from all those things he specifically denied having.

e.g. if MrRoboto specifically denies that "shelter" personally benefits him, then it is in fact a coherent counter-point to mention that homeless people lack shelter.

[TD1]

I don't think Reelya's approach was too far out there. Robo's main problem seems to have little to do with his actual ability, and more his self image. "Boo hoo get your frickin' act together" would probably be something I'd say if he were family. For a stranger, perhaps it is too familiar.

Towards a person with depression, it's harmful.

Is it? Gentler means such as I myself have promoted have thus far failed. Perhaps an approach which refuses to buy into the depressive's self-defeatist outlook would be beneficial. The best way to beat depression is to find motivation. Perhaps finding a motivator would help with that.

Not that any of us (to my knowledge) are in any way qualified to recommend anything.

[LordBaal]

Neither did I intended that. When I told him some days I have to skip meals to make sure my family don't have I was trying to give him another perspective. However I did say it, it seems his biggest hurdle is his lack of confidence and self-worth. I just hope he's fine and he keeps posting here even if is just complaining. I'm sure we'll both get out of our respective current predicaments.

[Reelya]

It can be bad to be too inward-looking about this sort of stuff, too.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2016/06/20/why-americas-men-arent-working

A new analysis from the White House’s Council of Economic Advisers, slated for release Monday, found that the United States now has the third-lowest participation rate for “prime-age men” among the world’s developed countries.

This is a national problem, and also specifically a problem in the American economy. It's also about twice as bad if you don't have a college education (around 10% of college-educated lack a job vs 20% of non-college educated).

That's why some sort of trade, skill or hobby are important. Look for high-demand skills. Creative writing courses at community college are not a high-demand skill. To turn a skill into a saleable ability, you need to focus on it, which is why hobbies are a good starting point. You don't just "learn" writing at college then you're a writer, the best writers write all the time because they like writing. Hell, if your only skill is playing FPS games then earn money gold farming in WoW or something.

[Trekkin]

Not that any of us (to my knowledge) are in any way qualified to recommend anything.

That's never stopped anyone on here before. Why start now?

[Dunamisdeos]

Not that any of us (to my knowledge) are in any way qualified to recommend anything.

That's never stopped anyone on here before. Why start now?

I recommend tripanning

[Kagus]

Hell, if your only skill is playing FPS games then earn money gold farming in WoW or something.

The... Um...

Hmm.

Not that any of us (to my knowledge) are in any way qualified to recommend anything.

That's never stopped anyone on here before. Why start now?

I recommend tripanning

Is that, like, triple-trepanning? Sounds nasty, but probably serves to air out the ol' noggin', eh?

I don't think Reelya's approach was too far out there. Robo's main problem seems to have little to do with his actual ability, and more his self image. "Boo hoo get your frickin' act together" would probably be something I'd say if he were family. For a stranger, perhaps it is too familiar.

Towards a person with depression, it's harmful.

Is it? Gentler means such as I myself have promoted have thus far failed. Perhaps an approach which refuses to buy into the depressive's self-defeatist outlook would be beneficial. The best way to beat depression is to find motivation. Perhaps finding a motivator would help with that.

Not that any of us (to my knowledge) are in any way qualified to recommend anything.

It is, actually, yeah. Because then you just feel bad, and guilty about feeling bad. But nothing gets done yet, because motivation doesn't work that way for someone in a depression. Trying to talk someone out of a depression is like trying to scrape your way through a brick wall with a spoon... Just because it's incredibly slow-going and seems to fight against you at every turn, doesn't mean that doing the opposite and putting more bricks there is going to get you a better result.

But indeed, no, none of us are qualified to recommend anything... We do care, though. It's just a matter of trying to take that empathy for what it is. And of course suggesting that you find someone who is qualified.