Sometimes I get angry at people for giving me a hard time and not forgiving me for my past, but then I remember that I'm not a good person yet.
She likely would still dislike me since she has no way of knowing I've changed, but I didn't even change that much.
How do normal people act like reasonable adults and not throw tantrums...
Knowing the person you speak of in question, and the context of all this...I've to ask you to think about this constructively--what were they thinking about, what part of my attitude were they affected by, etc.
Because these ideas bring your mental focus into looking at meaning. You can be frustrated, however which way you see what had happened. "You're allowed to feel" is a very technical thing I should however say (because I'm very tired and word things messily right now). It's ok to get frustrated. It's ok to feel. To put in mind out of all this however, is to think
what will be the outcome of what I will do? Impeding your own feelings before making a mature choice may create extra, unneeded conflict towards facing the situations one has. So it's ok to feel frustrated--but follow it all up with thinking how to go about these, and in situations where you can see the other person is not at fault, take them constructively by finding meaning you know you can work with (ie anything not sweepingly negative, and as if the other person is attacking you). Tantrumming is only an aftereffect as a reaction--being reasonable about it is what goes before and during those times.
It doesn't get easier to control. You just get better at it and become a stronger person.
Paradoxically, the latter applies at the same time as the former. One cannot control another's wishes, but one can control their own perception and insight into seeing what had happened before, into facing what one is experiencing
now.
*hugs Cinder*
We're all pretending.
Also, you cannot pretend what is not in part, real.
Acting like a reasonable adult isn't normal.That's strange, because everyone expects everyone to do so.
Note what reason is: How you think about the situation in mind. How others say 'presence of mind', usually means readiness of thought. Acting with reasoning is normal--acting like a reasonable adult is created and socialized with experience, and it is the times such as
these that we can use these experiences or past experiences to help ourselves, as a very real possibility: To look at one's own words, to look at how one thought about what happened before, to think about if these thoughts will be helpful in how they're used to reason things out...there are many ways on how to follow that up, because anyone has feelings that are important to address. What comes out of it is also very important, because sometimes we each have experiences in our past that shapes how we initially thought about things--pessimism and cynicism, optimism and realism, are all influenced in part by that initial reaction in how we thought about it.
You can throw a tantrum, but it will wane, and thereafter you'll be left with thoughts. Follow it up well, as you've got good friends to whom you can sound your ideas off; there are many people out there too who have mentioned they're ok with communicating by PMs.
Author
Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9471783 times)