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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9768611 times)

SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107025 on: August 25, 2016, 11:42:45 am »

The time may soon come when I am commanded to be a wretched human being, and I will lay my job on the table.
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

TheBiggerFish

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107026 on: August 25, 2016, 11:53:37 am »

@SalmonGod: :o
That's not good...

What's going on?

Can you talk about it at all?

...If you need someone to vent at, my PM box is open.
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scrdest

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107027 on: August 25, 2016, 02:03:09 pm »

It is NEVER weakness to express emotion.  Involuntarily, by choice, whichever.  Crying is perfectly okay.  It doesn't objectively hurt anybody, and no one will think less of you for feeling something. 
Not true. But expressing emotion really isn't weakness.

Though I mean, let's be real here, I don't want Yoink to ignore other advice because it's not quite true, even if they are constructive. First, it is weakness, but it's a justifiable one. You are new at the responsibility of being a landlord. You're not a bad person for not being instantly competent at a new thing. You just have to learn from this.
Being objective--crying is not a weakness. With a cultural perception in a way, it can be perceived as a weakness (ie cultures seeing males crying because of unfounded reasons. And/or social pressure, that can be overcome by understanding.), but as a core point, is NOT a sign, indicator, or otherwise OF "weakness".
Though it'd humor me if anyone can actually come up with logical reasons as to why someone crying is weakness. Responsibility goes to your lacrimal glands and/or other people's ability to perceive liquid coming from that region. :v
Quite simply - you show that you can be hurt, and if people know why you cry, how. You expose a vulnerability that can be exploited. A weak point - hence, weakness.
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martinuzz

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107028 on: August 25, 2016, 03:58:21 pm »

Sad news for some people with cancer treated by the commonly used medicine capecitabine (brand name Xeloda).
If they still have 'go to an exotic country' on their bucket list, they can probably forget about that.
For one out of seven people, the drug has the in itself harmless side effect of removing the relief from your fingertips, leaving you without fingerprints.
Without those, travelling to a lot of countries (for example, to the USA) becomes impossible.

While the effect was rather unknown in the medical world, with only a few cases reported in medical journals, a recent studies into it by the Dutch Erasmus Medical Center showed 14% of patients (there's 12000 people using it in our small country, it's really on of the most used cancer drugs) using the drug suffering from decaying, to completely disappeared fingerprints.
When intake of the medication is stopped, the fingerprints will return, unchanged.
Fun fact, the medical studies was started only after forensic police asked medical science to look into it, after a police chief wondered why his grandad's job's security doors didn't let him go to work anymore.

In practice, patients in the Netherlands have been having problems with applying for a new passport, getting through security doors at their jobs, and unlocking their smartphones.
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MaximumZero

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107029 on: August 25, 2016, 03:59:55 pm »

Time to become a criminal mastermind.
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Sirus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107030 on: August 25, 2016, 04:11:35 pm »

That is probably one of the more bizarre-yet-medically-harmless side effects I've ever heard of.
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MaximumZero

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107031 on: August 25, 2016, 04:13:22 pm »

That is probably one of the more bizarre-yet-medically-harmless side effects I've ever heard of.
Prozac has a really good NSFW one that I "suffer" from sometimes.
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

Defacto

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107032 on: August 25, 2016, 04:36:16 pm »

@KoSS: Aw shit, that sucks. Hopefully this person had a good reason for it. :I

also ach

I am so far enjoying folk high school, but the internet is SO SHITTY. Half the time it doesn't even connect to a page, and the other half it's another 50/50 chance of it even loading correctly. And, just to rub it in, there IS good mobile internet in the area (4G)... But not inside this building. In here, mobile internet is pretty much horseshit. I've so far only experienced one place with good wifi and one room with 4G access, out of... Well, a lot. It's a big place. Normally i'd call this a first world problem, but it's actually so bad that it's legitimately problematic at times.

That besides, i've failed a lot of willpower checks against my anxiety. Even after meeting another guy who's an avid cartoony drawy dude (free advertising for him lol), and having seen his stuff and showed him some of mine, i'm STILL ridiculously apprehensive about picking up my pencil and drawing things. I mean holy shit, i thought i'd been making good progress, but it's still pretty goddamn nasty. At least i have a lot of opportunities to try again. >.>

You're studying in Denmark, right? If so, I'm doing the same about 1500 km to your north. Good luck!
I'm not sure if this counts as a sad, but now that I'm meeting and socializing with my fellow students I've realized how socially isolated I've been during the past years. This isn't the case now, so that's... good? I still feel strangely uncomfortable, though. Gee, people-to-people stuff is hard. Luckily the people I'm studying with seem to be all-round good folk.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107033 on: August 25, 2016, 05:10:13 pm »

No, I'm not going to be forced to do anything truly evil or illegal.

Basically, the data entry side of our work (reporting data on international imports to U.S. Customs) is being heavily audited.  Every entry is completely reviewed.  And the compliance manager is extremely harsh and unsympathetic towards a majority of employees in the office who are doing that type of work, with a couple notable exceptions.  She keeps going to the office manager, trying to portray our employees as a bunch of idiots who aren't paying any attention to what they're doing, and she loosely backs it up by throwing up a bunch of unorganized data with no context on a screen and going "Look at this!!!".  Said office manager is not a critical thinker and tends to leap into drastic actions based on initial emotional reactions to things.

So I've been protecting my people, gathering my own data to counter the compliance manager's story.  When you actually apply some critical analysis to the numbers, everyone actually looks pretty damn awesome.  The state of things in our department is really good, as far as employee attitudes.  Everyone gets along and is very dedicated.  The management over this department (myself and 2 others) do not want to jeopardize this.  I actually took the initiative to put together a google spreadsheet that feeds in audit data 100% automated and real-time as it's generated, and turns it into a full suite of statistics on error types, and accuracy rates, with a weighted scoring that takes into account work volumes.

The major issue is the compliance team grades our entries on a strict pass or fail basis per entry.  But there's one team in the office whose entries are 4x as large on average as everyone else's.  To put this in perspective a "1 line" entry, the minimum size, contains about 40 manually entered data points.  A typo or misunderstanding on any of those points results in a fail.  So when an entry is over 100 lines (which certain employees see routinely and others don't), it is overwhelmingly unfair to grade that on the same strict pass/fail basis as a 1 line entry.  One employee could do 20 small entries in a day, make a mistake, and have a 95% pass rate, while another employee could spend an entire day on one massive entry, make a mistake, and get 0%.  So the way the compliance department is grading, certain employees are looking really bad.  But if you account for how accurate they really are in relation to the amount of data they're handling, they look just as good as everyone else, or better. 

I put a ton of work into putting together comprehensive data that shows this indisputably, and put forth a prototype weighted scoring system.  All the managers agreed it looks really good, the way I put the numbers together is much more fair, and I got all kinds of highly visible pats on the back for it... but in talks behind closed doors, nothing's changing.  The compliance manager just keeps pushing harder for people to be written up based on flawed data and seriously unfair standards.

And this is exactly the kind of shit that had me horribly depressed for 7 years at my last job.  I feel very strongly about it.  It is absolutely miserable to spend the majority of your waking life in a place where your actions are put under a microscope, and you're held to higher standards than everyone else in reality just to be seen as equal to everyone else under the guise of "fairness."  Because someone arbitrarily decides "this is the standard" without any consideration for how everyone's circumstances relate to that standard.  It's a life of anxiety and resentment, and I absolutely will not be a part of putting that on someone else.  If I'm told I have to take action on someone because of this stuff, I'll straight up tell them that whatever the consequences, I'm not doing it.

And it's just the most disgusting icing on this cake of bullshit that any attempt to characterize this situation as hostile towards employees is countered with "Oh no don't take it that way.  We're just trying to find out where out opportunities are for improvement and determine where we need to have discussions with employees to see how we can help them do better."  Everyone knows full well that "having a discussion" is current HR jargon for embarking on a path of disciplinary action, and that the "performance improvement plan" is just a new presentation for the same old 3 strikes/you're out.  It's so shallowly two-faced it makes me sick.

I'm really not cut out to be a manager personality-wise.  The way everyone conducts themselves in manager-only meetings and talks about the employees makes me feel like a fucking gilded age robber-baron lounging in a smoke-filled study with a bunch of other bearded old white men.  I just have no willful suspension of disbelief for the way corporate bullshit is shamelessly spun to put a shallow facade of friendliness on callous exploitation and nepotism, and it drives me insane how easily people lose sight of the experience of being a bottom level employee, dealing with the consequences of decisions made by people who stubbornly disconnect and deny reality.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2016, 05:12:25 pm by SalmonGod »
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Shook

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107034 on: August 25, 2016, 05:37:57 pm »

Good grief, that sounds like some top tier bullshit, i'm sorry that you have to deal with that. For what it's worth though, i'd much rather have a guy like you as my manager instead of the types you described. I don't know anything for sure, but i have the distinct feeling that employees are much more likely to work hard if they're respected by their higher-ups. :I
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JoshuaFH

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107035 on: August 25, 2016, 06:01:42 pm »

I'm really not cut out to be a manager personality-wise. 

I've been heavily reading books on Management by Peter Drucker, and from your short account I'd have to say that you have many of the qualities to be a great manager: respect and compassion for your fellow workers, consideration for accuracy and fairness of data, and a desire for efficacy and trust above politics and backstabbing.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107036 on: August 25, 2016, 07:37:35 pm »

Let me re-phrase... I don't have the personality to get along in typical management culture.  Which, unfortunately, is part of being a manager... getting along with the other ones.
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

BlackHeartKabal

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107037 on: August 25, 2016, 07:38:38 pm »

Sorry for posting in this thread so much. It's just been a bad few days and I really need to rant for a while.
No need for apologies. You're welcome to post as much as you desire.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2016, 09:20:56 pm by BlackHeartKabal »
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Kot

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107038 on: August 25, 2016, 09:10:38 pm »

At this point I'm not even sure what's going on.
I am perpetually sad. It's not like it's without reason because I have reasons but it would feel nice to not be sad and feel like shit for once.
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #107039 on: August 25, 2016, 10:18:44 pm »

Caroline, you don't need to apologize for having crappy parents.

I'm sorry I can't help you with them.

@SalmonGod:You are a better manager than they are.  That's the end of it.  You can only help your people and try to convince them otherwise.

Kot:*hugpats*
If there's anything I can do to help, let me know.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.
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