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[BorkBorkGoesTheCode]

Why is everything about me so awful.

What response would you like to that rhetorical question? Others have said that you aren't worthless, have you been listening?

Of course, and I immediately took that as face value, hence obliviating my disappointment at myself, because hey, at least I'm average, right? No need to be better than that, surely. I should be fine being uninteresting.

What do your parents say? What standards do they hold you to?

Average is pretty decent tbh

To each their own.

[Orange Wizard]

Average is pretty decent tbh

To each their own.

Average is bad, average is above average, these are all valid opinions. Because

[chaotic skies]

Man, I just love how anything positive I see, my brain immediately turns into a way to torture me. At least I've started to ignore myself, I guess? I doubt that's a good thing, but I don't really know what else to do anymore. I mean, I've tried listening to my own thoughts about myself, but that only led to me thinking I'm never good enough. Which got annoying, not being good enough for myself. This doesn't make any sense. The more I try to explain this, the worse I explain it. Ah, fuckeht. I've never been good at articulating my thoughts, why start now?

[TheBiggerFish]

*hugpats everybody*

Why is everything about me so awful.

It's not.  Nor has it been.

[BlackHeartKabal]

Man, I just love how anything positive I see, my brain immediately turns into a way to torture me. At least I've started to ignore myself, I guess? I doubt that's a good thing, but I don't really know what else to do anymore. I mean, I've tried listening to my own thoughts about myself, but that only led to me thinking I'm never good enough. Which got annoying, not being good enough for myself. This doesn't make any sense. The more I try to explain this, the worse I explain it. Ah, fuckeht. I've never been good at articulating my thoughts, why start now?

I'm not a psych major (yet, maybe, perhaps, when am I ever certain about these things), but I have a general idea of what you're trying to say, just that you aren't convinced that you're good enough to satisfy yourself. You're being vague, which I can understand, but from what I can see, you aren't a bad person at all. I'm not the only person who thinks so.

Why is everything about me so awful.

What response would you like to that rhetorical question? Others have said that you aren't worthless, have you been listening?

Of course, and I immediately took that as face value, hence obliviating my disappointment at myself, because hey, at least I'm average, right? No need to be better than that, surely. I should be fine being uninteresting.

We have different definitions of average, I guess. You are decidedly not. You also aren't uninteresting, you don't even come close to the definition of the word. Everyone has flaws and vices, but you are not an awful person.

[TheBiggerFish]

I'll just reiterate what BHK said.

Man, I just love how anything positive I see, my brain immediately turns into a way to torture me. At least I've started to ignore myself, I guess? I doubt that's a good thing, but I don't really know what else to do anymore. I mean, I've tried listening to my own thoughts about myself, but that only led to me thinking I'm never good enough. Which got annoying, not being good enough for myself. This doesn't make any sense. The more I try to explain this, the worse I explain it. Ah, fuckeht. I've never been good at articulating my thoughts, why start now?

I'm not a psych major (yet, maybe, perhaps, when am I ever certain about these things), but I have a general idea of what you're trying to say, just that you aren't convinced that you're good enough to satisfy yourself. You're being vague, which I can understand, but from what I can see, you aren't a bad person at all. I'm not the only person who thinks so.

Why is everything about me so awful.

What response would you like to that rhetorical question? Others have said that you aren't worthless, have you been listening?

Of course, and I immediately took that as face value, hence obliviating my disappointment at myself, because hey, at least I'm average, right? No need to be better than that, surely. I should be fine being uninteresting.

We have different definitions of average, I guess. You are decidedly not. You also aren't uninteresting, you don't even come close to the definition of the word. Everyone has flaws and vices, but you are not an awful person.

[Spehss _]

Why is everything about me so awful.

What response would you like to that rhetorical question? Others have said that you aren't worthless, have you been listening?

Of course, and I immediately took that as face value, hence obliviating my disappointment at myself, because hey, at least I'm average, right? No need to be better than that, surely. I should be fine being uninteresting.

If you don't want to be average, use that as motivation to git gud improve yourself and become better than average. row row fight the powah

Even if you don't become the best that ever was, you could probably improve your self confidence.

[hector13]

I wanna be the very best, like no-one ever was...

[Orange Wizard]

I was thinking today about a visit I had with my psychologist, probably about six months ago now.
She opened the session with the usual "how are you", etc. but started then with a number of questions, each getting more and more personal and difficult for me to answer. I didn't realise at the time but her goal was to see how long it took before I started to get uncomfortable. I'd been going to her for the better part of a year by this stage, so she knew all the right buttons to press.
After a while she gave up and asked me how I felt. I said I didn't know, but after some probing we narrowed it down to "extremely distressed".
She admitted that I was not showing a single sign of that, that I appeared perfectly calm.

The whole thing really bothers me. I've never liked how I feel to show on my face, but until that point I'd never realised I was actually any good at hiding things. I don't know what I think about it.

[TheBiggerFish]

You could be a good politician ;P

I don't know how to respond to that, so *hugpats* on general principle.

[Emma]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It seems like the only thought I've had for the past few months about myself is: I hate myself or I'm worthless and useless.

[Arx]

Well, you're not worthless. I can tell you that.

I highly recommend seeing a therapist of some variety. It might be the best decision I ever made. I look back on the time when I felt much like that and it kind of terrifies me.

[NRDL]

Well, you're not worthless. I can tell you that.

I highly recommend seeing a therapist of some variety. It might be the best decision I ever made. I look back on the time when I felt much like that and it kind of terrifies me.

+1 so, so freaking hard.

[Tiruin]

Well, you're not worthless. I can tell you that.

I highly recommend seeing a therapist of some variety. It might be the best decision I ever made. I look back on the time when I felt much like that and it kind of terrifies me.

+1 so, so freaking hard.

+1 from a student aiming to be one or of similar profession.
REALLY diverse set of knowledge there, along with it being a mentally tough profession.

[Truean]

Cleveland has become a Police State: http://www.cracked.com/blog/things-you-notice-as-your-city-shuts-down/