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[IronTomato]

I didn't even know the latter. IT, you rant too little.

As the people who I was talking to pointed out, a lot of the time I go on IRC it's just because I have something to rant about, mainly because the Rage Thread got permanently locked. (Guess whose fault that was?)

[Spehss _]

@Spehss:Advice on figuring out where to find those?

O. Wilde mentioned a FAFSA. I assumed that meant he was filling out a FAFSA. Filling out a FAFSA implies he has a college in mind to send it to. By sending a FAFSA to a college the college will review the FAFSA and offer whatever financial aid they have available. Then he just chooses what aid he wants to accept. Grants are good because they aren't loans that have to be paid back with interest, loans are bad because they are loans with debts and interest. Logically that means "don't pick loans unless you can afford to pay them back or have no choice".

Scholarships require...research. I'm personally not really familiar with scholarship applications, and the application process and requirements varies based on who's providing the scholarship. I know there's lots of "little" scholarships that get offered that supposedly don't get many applications, because it's not some big amount of money. But getting several "small" scholarships can be as helpful as one "big" scholarship that has lots of competition for applying. Admittedly this is hearsay I heard from my high school faculty during my senior year of high school, it could be that there's currently competition for scholarships regardless of size. Paying for colleg ein the US is a big deal and student debts are a big current issue and all that. Anyway, there's databases of what scholarships are available offered by different groups, and some are more trustworthy or less scammy than others. I guess I'd suggest College Board since they're non-profit and offer lots of other services in regards to college stuff.

[smeding]

Essentially found out after ranting on IRC that my only real reputation on B12 is that I start a ton of shit and always come across as an excessively angry dickhead. I already knew about the former, but this is why I didn't want to start talking about things that bother me. The second I decided it was okay to vent about things I basically became nothing except a massive pain in the ass to other people, and like so mamy other things I was too stupid to realize it until people finally told me. I don't see why I even bother trying to talk to anyone at all.

I don't normally post here but I just kinda wanted to set the record straight, being one of the people from that conversation -- IT frames this in a weird out-of-context way that makes it look like we hate his guts, which isn't really true.

Yes I said that it seems like he tends to mainly come on IRC when he's angry. I didn't tell him that because I think he's always an angry dickhead, just to say that it makes it harder to take him seriously if he only comes on there to vent. It didn't help that this time, he talked about the idea of a philosophy major in a way that sounded kind of sarcastic and dismissive, when right before, he was talking about picking a major himself. When people brought that up, he said he didn't mean to be dismissive, got defensive and said how it shouldn't be his fault if people "choose to misinterpret the mood of my words".

What people (well, ok, some of us, I can't vouch for everyone) were trying to say was that it would help if he tried to critically look at his own behaviour and language, and how it influences how he's perceived, but I guess what he took away from it is "everyone here hates me", and that's a shame.

After that, though, we all managed to have some dece talks about video games and TASes, so it wasn't all drama.

Just wanted to drop in to show another viewpoint on the same conversation, to break up some of the weird judgement based on one side of a story.

Roy

[SomeStupidGuy]

Speaking as someone who was also involved in that conversation, lol, what kind of nerd signs off on his forum posts.

Nah tho, my bro smeding's forum inexperience aside, that's more or less the long and short of it.
I honestly thought that IT left the discussion feeling less negative about the whole deal once it was done with and it's kinda a downer that he ended up taking that above anything else from the conversation.

That's pretty much all I have to add, folks, so have a nice day and all that.

[Helgoland]

smedng? Aren't you the pretty much only guy who's active on #bay12lb wthout being a proper lower board member?

[IronTomato]

In other words, they said "We can't take you seriously because you sound too angry when you're here". That's pretty much the same thing I was trying to say.

got defensive and said how it shouldn't be his fault if people "choose to misinterpret the mood of my words".

Also, that's not something that I just up and said out of the blue, I said that after essentially being told that I didn't need anything more than the bare bones of respect because you guys found my ranting to be too angry.

Also, I was talking about the forums in general, not IRC.

[Yoink]

Wait, what- I thought Smeding had been around for ages and was a semi-regular poster? O.o
Certainly enough of a poster not to be an escaped lunatic. Or am I remembering someone named Smeding from someplace else?

[smeding]

Personally when I rant, I really don't want people to react. I just want to, uh, well, be slightly acknowledged and then ignored. Ranting is really one-sided - as long as whoever you rant to doesn't make you mad, it's good.

I get that, it's cathartic, but there's a difference between talking in a channel and occasionally complaining (I do it too!) and talking in a channel mostly only to complain. It's not the only thing he does, but it happens often enough that I think it's worth addressing.

In other words, they said "We can't take you seriously because you sound too angry when you're here". That's pretty much the same thing I was trying to say.

Yes, that's "in other words", specifically words that leave out most of the context again, including the part that I explicitly said was the key point I was trying to make.

Also, that's not something that I just up and said out of the blue, I said that after essentially being told that I didn't need anything more than the bare bones of respect because you guys found my ranting to be too angry.

The framing makes all the difference. The lesson I keep hoping you'll take away from this is that you have a hand in how you present yourself. That includes choices in phrasing, and yes, sometimes choices in conversation topics too. When I explained how I perceive you a lot of (not all of!) the time, it wasn't to point out some hideous character flaw that can never be repaired, it's to point out that maybe you should do something about that.

Also, I was talking about the forums in general, not IRC.

Yes, and this thread has told you that's not what the forums think (I wouldn't know), and I have told you that's not what at least part of the IRC crowd thinks. Maybe it's a tone issue (a running theme) but it sounds like you still feel like we hate you, despite direct evidence to the contrary from all sides. Isn't that a bit silly?

Roy

(suck it, SomeStupidGuy <3)

edit: I think I've made my point to the best of my 3:30AM ability, so think of it what you will, I'll stop posting here again. Carry on.

[GiglameshDespair]

Oh, internet drama.

[Rolan7]

Kinda sad that I love internet drama.
But uh, I don't really know enough about this situation to get a rush from it.  So I'm just sorry it's happening, I guess.
I have read IronTomato's posts here and I didn't get the impression he was complaining "too much", just using it as an outlet when things were so bad it was necessary...
So what the thread is for, basically, I think?  I've certainly used it that way, and it really helped even when nobody replied.
(I do love when people reply, but an outlet is an outlet regardless)

Disregard this I suck beers.

[Reudh]

People are concerned about me being weird. I don't conform to their image. Normally, if I was any single bit normal, I would try to change and perhaps already know how to do it by default. But I'm not. My hobbies do not conform to theirs. While people dawdle over cars, women and their boobs, sports, and socialization, I don't really have any inclinations for such things.

To be perfectly honest, I don't even know what I want at all. I watch things because they're nice. Why are they nice? Dunno. But I digress, the point being that, I am weird because I do not conform to their norms of Justin-Bieber, Tiesto, Adele, high-fashion nightclubbing desires. Being weird, because I do not conform to social norms, should I even try to adapt? I do not feign enjoyment well enough out of dancing in the middle of a nightclub; it feels weird to be thinking about things such as THESE when I'm at the middle of the dancing area. Hell, I feign a lot of things when I drunk and stop just before I become horribly drunk; thus pretending to be easily affected by spirits, just to think I'm having fun when I'm not.

It mystifies me why people enjoy a bout of drinking to be perfectly honest, despite being its proponent for contributing to social conversations. Why buy a drink when you can enjoy a hearty conversation all the same without it?

Back on point, should I try being normal for once - the normalcy Philippine youth and people demand from me? The hedonistic enjoyment of pleasures that I don't really find any particular enjoyment? I am already weird.

complaining about being perceived as weird for not enjoying mainstream music is itself a kind of conformation to societal standards. It's hardly non-conformist to not like music a majority of people like.
Also, regarding alcohol:

Sure, drinking to get drunk is a pretty silly thing to do, but some people enjoy the escapist sensations of it. Me personally: I don't drink heavily, because I dislike the lack of "control" i feel while drunk, but you're cutting yourself out of a lot of interesting flavours.

Kinda sad that I love internet drama.
But uh, I don't really know enough about this situation to get a rush from it.  So I'm just sorry it's happening, I guess.
I have read IronTomato's posts here and I didn't get the impression he was complaining "too much", just using it as an outlet when things were so bad it was necessary...
So what the thread is for, basically, I think?  I've certainly used it that way, and it really helped even when nobody replied.
(I do love when people reply, but an outlet is an outlet regardless)

Disregard this I suck beers.

Irontomato's a good guy, he's just going through some shit, from what I know of. That said, he does come into IRC to rant rather a lot. When he's not ranting about things he's fantastic company.

[quinnr]

@Spehss:Advice on figuring out where to find those?

O. Wilde mentioned a FAFSA. I assumed that meant he was filling out a FAFSA. Filling out a FAFSA implies he has a college in mind to send it to. By sending a FAFSA to a college the college will review the FAFSA and offer whatever financial aid they have available. Then he just chooses what aid he wants to accept. Grants are good because they aren't loans that have to be paid back with interest, loans are bad because they are loans with debts and interest. Logically that means "don't pick loans unless you can afford to pay them back or have no choice".

Scholarships require...research. I'm personally not really familiar with scholarship applications, and the application process and requirements varies based on who's providing the scholarship. I know there's lots of "little" scholarships that get offered that supposedly don't get many applications, because it's not some big amount of money. But getting several "small" scholarships can be as helpful as one "big" scholarship that has lots of competition for applying. Admittedly this is hearsay I heard from my high school faculty during my senior year of high school, it could be that there's currently competition for scholarships regardless of size. Paying for colleg ein the US is a big deal and student debts are a big current issue and all that. Anyway, there's databases of what scholarships are available offered by different groups, and some are more trustworthy or less scammy than others. I guess I'd suggest College Board since they're non-profit and offer lots of other services in regards to college stuff.

A little note on what I've learned about scholarships while in college, when you are looking for scholarship opportunities, try to look for things that are for a niche interest. For example, there are a lot of local (city) scholarships for students who have done stuff to support LGBT+ people where I am. There are also ones for people who have done work to help the environment, things like that. Get involved, do things that actually matter, if you can. That goes a long way for scholarship applications.

My university (and probably most others) has an office of Scholarship and Fellowship Advising, which exists specifically to help students with all that research and application process, so see if you have something like that.

[O.Wilde]

@Spehss:Advice on figuring out where to find those?

O. Wilde mentioned a FAFSA. I assumed that meant he was filling out a FAFSA. Filling out a FAFSA implies he has a college in mind to send it to. By sending a FAFSA to a college the college will review the FAFSA and offer whatever financial aid they have available. Then he just chooses what aid he wants to accept. Grants are good because they aren't loans that have to be paid back with interest, loans are bad because they are loans with debts and interest. Logically that means "don't pick loans unless you can afford to pay them back or have no choice".

Scholarships require...research. I'm personally not really familiar with scholarship applications, and the application process and requirements varies based on who's providing the scholarship. I know there's lots of "little" scholarships that get offered that supposedly don't get many applications, because it's not some big amount of money. But getting several "small" scholarships can be as helpful as one "big" scholarship that has lots of competition for applying. Admittedly this is hearsay I heard from my high school faculty during my senior year of high school, it could be that there's currently competition for scholarships regardless of size. Paying for colleg ein the US is a big deal and student debts are a big current issue and all that. Anyway, there's databases of what scholarships are available offered by different groups, and some are more trustworthy or less scammy than others. I guess I'd suggest College Board since they're non-profit and offer lots of other services in regards to college stuff.

Yeah, this is pretty accurate, although it is worth noting that College Board is the scum of the earth, and will try to get you to pay for anything and everything. Fastweb.com isn't terrible, they look a bit sketchy but they do have a pretty decent amount of scholarships listed.
Quinnr's thing about niche interests is spot on, there's still gonna be competition, but 1 in 100 for $1000 is much better odds than 1 in 5000 for $10,000. Applying to everything you can get your hands on is also a good tactic.

[MaximumZero]

excessively angry dickhead.

That's my job, quit trying to steal it.

[Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum]

Oh, today was... awkward. I have to do the Christmas family time a bit later with my mom's side.

For some reason they thought it would be a good idea to split off into boys and girls for the night, and even though I stayed home and played animal crossing I got quite a bit of hate from my grandmother. She spent a while telling me how I wasn't wanted around her, etc. Even better is that I get to spend tomorrow sleeping over at her place! Yay.

My cousin refers to me as "she", my grandmother replies "Good job, the worst thing you can do to a boy is call him a girl!"
Even if she didn't know I was Trans, she was still congratulating my cousin for insulting me?