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[Rolan7]

(Oh, and--why does it seem no one is concerned about male-pattern PTSD until someone starts talking about female-pattern PTSD?)

(I'd guess because, in very broad terms, men are encouraged to hide emotional vulnerability, even respond confrontationally.  Whereas it's okay, even attractive for women to be vulnerable but not angry or opinionated.  This makes me sad and angry at gender roles.)

It is not possible for me to control my environment to the point of never experiencing these things in it. When I go to class--the guy next to me, in a friendly gesture, makes a rape joke ("Did you get raped by the homework too?"). When I go to computer lab, sometimes there are guys in there riffing off each other, sequential series of rape jokes. I cannot both avoid them and do the work I need to complete my degree.

I usually ask my friends before we watch a movie: "Do you know if this has any rape scenes in it?" and often, they've seen it before and they still say no, and then WHOOP, rape turns out to be, like, the center of the plot. I am doing everything I can to protect myself and also engage in public life. Sometimes, that's not possible to do all on my own. Some sort of trigger warning I could look up would be really helpful. It doesn't have to be at the beginning, to ruin the experience for everyone else. It could be part of a DVD submenu, or a page at the back of the book, or a footnote in the liner notes on a CD, or a tooltip you get when you mouse over the heading of a news article. Making these things accessible doesn't have to bother those without these problems at all, and it would take very little effort on the part of publishers to add a little something.

And no, it's not just "upset," like "angry" or "sad." It's "dissociate and be a catatonic vegetable for the rest of the afternoon, or perhaps the rest of the week," with no other options. That's not a voluntary reaction, something you can buck up against. If it were voluntary, you wouldn't call it a mental illness.

People in public ought to have basic decency in front of strangers, and trigger warnings for movies really ought to be a thing.  We get so many trailers yet we aren't given useful warnings and information about the content, unless you count trawling through reviews.  Which really shouldn't be necessary.

[Bohandas]

I don't get why the topic is so incredibly taboo. Murder? Torture? Auschwitz? Trollolol, shit's hilarious. Get the kids in here, they love watching people getting riddled with bullets. Sex? Rape? GET THE HELL OUT YOU INSENSITIVE ARSE.

Most people aren't murder victim I guess.

The overwhelming majority aren't rape victims either

[Vector]

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[Magistrum]

At least 1/12 of the population has been raped (the usual "one in six" female statistic applies here, with an assumption of underreporting from the male side of things). That is about the same size as the homosexual population, and probably worth extending some care to.

Ouch... I just couldn't imagine a problem so big... Was that study reviewed recently?
That's far too frequent for something so horrible.

[Graknorke]

the usual "one in six" female statistic applies here

The last I heard the usual statistic was one in four.

[Vector]

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[Graknorke]

No, one in four is older than that. Though I'd also heard that the study it's drawn from was garbage as far as statistics go, so I guess it's not important.

[Bohandas]

The overwhelming majority aren't rape victims either

At least 1/12 of the population has been raped (the usual "one in six" female statistic applies here, with an assumption of underreporting from the male side of things). That is about the same size as the homosexual population, and probably worth extending some care to.

I find that difficult to believe. Even if we assume its padded out with dubiously relevant things like "she consented but it doesn't count because she was drunk" or "we didn't realize that the age of consent was higher in this state" that still sounds way the hell too high [to be believable]

EDIT:
I just realized that I forgot to take third world shitholes into account. It kind of makes sense to me now. What's the rate in civilized countries?

[Dutchling]

way the hell too high

I think we can all agree on that

[AlleeCat]

Eh. I tend to think that if someone can't handle a given topic, it's up to them to avoid encountering it.

I'm sorry, but this is complete bullshit, and it's the exact same argument my housemate tried to use to say transphobic things around me. It's not my fault for getting offended. Apologize and move on. Not only is that polite, but it is also far more efficient than sitting around and trying to argue about why they shouldn't be offended.

I find that difficult to believe. Even if we assume its padded out with dubiously relevant things like "she consented but it doesn't count because she was drunk" or "we didn't realize that the age of consent was higher in this state" that still sounds way the hell too high

Unfortunately, I don't find that hard to believe at all, (and by the way, sex with someone who is under the influence is considered rape in a lot of places.) because I would say about 1/6 AFAB people I know have been raped, either as adults or as children, and a couple AMAB people too.
Rape is unfortunately very common in the states at least, and a lot of it either goes unreported or gets turned down as a false claim.

[Vector]

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[Bohandas]

I find that difficult to believe. Even if we assume its padded out with dubiously relevant things like "she consented but it doesn't count because she was drunk" or "we didn't realize that the age of consent was higher in this state" that still sounds way the hell too high

and by the way, sex with someone who is under the influence is considered rape in a lot of places.

I am aware of that, that's why I think they'd be likely to pad the numbers out with it, despite said regulations being bullshit.

I can totally get behind the ides of "'No' means 'No'", but when someone tries to say that "'Yes' also means 'No'" that's when I stop listening to what they have to say, becaise they're clearly not making sense.

EDIT:
It's not like they're buying a car or doing something that needs to be carefully thought out or carefully considered. This isn't the 1800's.

[Solifuge]

Perhaps you're familiar with the idea of "duress"? The idea that someone can be influenced into consent in a situation in which they normally wouldn't?

To present a hyperbole for example, say a violent rapist points a gun at someone then says "Lets have sex, or I'll shoot you." The victim agrees. Yes, this is consent in a literal sense, but I think most decent people would agree that it was given under extenuating circumstances that made them act outside of their normal interests.

The same can be said of agreeing to something while in an altered state of consciousness from being drugged, drinking, etc. Yes someone is responsible for getting themselves drunk. So too, others are responsible for not taking advantage of their drunken judgement to get them to agree to something they wouldn't while sober.

P.S. Though this statistic makes me sad, I think this might be a discussion to take to another thread? It's getting big enough to support itself, and constitutes a bit of a derail.

[miauw62]

man, sometimes i wish we had a thread to post in when we were sad and not be ignored.

[Vector]

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