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[Trapezohedron]

Mr. Space Cat,

Damn. You have my condolences, man. It just had to happen too early. Damn. :|

I'd say you're doing the right thing crying about her. It just shows that you really cared for her and not just "cared", in the sense of mandatory familial obligation. And what Tiruin said, emotions don't make you pathetic. They're proof of your humanity. People tend to say "Crying is bad" mostly because they don't want to deal with the tears of others. Some are more selfish about it than others, saying that to keep people from "whining" about personal problems, while some don't want that to happen because they might not be able to deal with the emotional fallout (i.e cry along with you).

Emotions don't make you weak. Cherish it, because there are times you will wish to feel something because you couldn't.

I apologize for sounding to scold you in what is a tough time for you and being too banal about it. :<

[Tack]

I have terrible memory, and it's a curse.

[Knit tie]

Aaaaaaand you've got a dark and troubled past, Tiruin. The "JRPG morality center girl" stereotype in now complete.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

That was a joke. Sorry.

My condolences, Mr. Space Cat. I cannot say that I've myself lost many loved ones, but I understand how you feel, and I can tell you that you have no reason whatsoever to wrack yourself. Some things in this life are inevitable, such as death, and there is absolutely nothing you could've done to help your Aunt. People are not magical, sadly, and you had no way of knowing that that aneyrism would've happened, and even if you somehow did, circulatory system failure is almost unpreventable as a general rule. There was simply nothing you could do. There is not a single speck of your guilt in what has happened.

Crying is normal, I have to add. It's merely a symptom of love and care, and those who insist otherwise are most likely idiotic fat nerds tripping high on power fantasy. People are hardwired to feel sad when somebody close to them dies, and that you do so means that you truly held your aunt dear. Don't fight the feeling. Let it pass over you and away. Tears wash the sadness away, an old Russian saying goes.

[Tiruin]

Aaaaaaand you've got a dark and troubled past, Tiruin. The "JRPG morality center girl" stereotype in now complete.

6 years, bro. ~6-8 years I can't remember because they were too painful to. ^ ^
^{And only in my nightmares do I see that past. Shrouded by my unconscious or subconscious. It is there. It is the darkness.
And I am learning how to fight it. How to accept it. How to understand it. It is the darkness. It is my light.}
Mwahaha. But really.
...True story. :/
*clicks spoiler*
Oh. ... I didn't take it as any offense. xD

[Facekillz058]

I'm feeling like a terrible person.
Everything I do is about money.
I don't even need money, I live a perfectly content life.
But every time someone asks me to do more than a minor favor or chore:
"What do I get?"
I have an insatiable desire for material wealth and I feel like I may end up alienating the people I care about because of it.
I'm feeling like a D-bag all the time but holy shit money.
It's so great.
I want all of the money.
I'm having such an incredible fight in my conscience between greed and morality.
I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not going to break the law or hurt people for money.
In fact, I recently turned down an extremely prestigious honor at school just because of what it entailed.
(For those curious, National Honor Society, and fuck things that require you do volunteer work)
I have such a crappy feeling in my stomach because of how I feel about myself and I just need reassurance:
Am I terrible person?

[Knit tie]

The first 14 or so years of my life were filled with me having variouw psychoses and being an awful person in general. I sometimes wonder why my parents are still against abortion.

And seriously, Tir, when you write in that lowercase I always interpret it as "cute, shy whisper." I have no idea why.

What do you usually try to convey by that literary maneuver anyway?

I'm feeling like a terrible person.
Everything I do is about money.
I don't even need money, I live a perfectly content life.
But every time someone asks me to do more than a minor favor or chore:
"What do I get?"
I have an insatiable desire for material wealth and I feel like I may end up alienating the people I care about because of it.
I'm feeling like a D-bag all the time but holy shit money.
It's so great.
I want all of the money.
I'm having such an incredible fight in my conscience between greed and morality.
I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not going to break the law or hurt people for money.
In fact, I recently turned down an extremely prestigious honor at school just because of what it entailed.
(For those curious, National Honor Society, and fuck things that require you do volunteer work)
I have such a crappy feeling in my stomach because of how I feel about myself and I just need reassurance:
Am I terrible person?

No you are not. Everybody has vices, yours truly is frequently dismotivated enough to make Oblomov seem like heroic fantasy.

[kaijyuu]

Am I terrible person?

Well if you have self control, then no.

Not to say your obsession with material wealth is a good thing, because well... it seems like an obsession. But being a "bad person" tends to require stuff like rationalizing away faults. It doesn't appear that you are doing that.

[Facekillz058]

I appreciate the kind words folks.
But more so, the small analyses you people did kind of put everything into perspective.

[Owlga]

Personally, I'd never do something for someone other than like... Janet or my cousin for free.

Time is valuable, there's nothing wrong with feeling that way.

[Tiruin]

-snip-

No. You aren't a terrible person.
But you seem to be undecided in your choices present.
Let me ask you something: Does wealth really matter? What can it get you? Are you doing what you are doing because of sincerity or because of an ulterior motive? Think ahead in many scenarios how that'll play out.
You realize you don't need much right now: Ask yourself Why you are wanting much. That helps, asking yourself these things then analyzing it. Why do you need 'all' of the money?

Funny thing is, if that is the definition of a terrible person--one who knows the wrong things are happening and fights it? Then it goes against the conventional meaning of terrible.
You don't seem to be wishing for reinforcing details on why you should pick greed over anything else. If you keep on asking 'what do I get [for doing x]' as a result from doing it, then why are you doing it in the first place? For rewards? For something in return?
[/hypotheticalscenario,go!]
You have a choice. The final say in your choice there.

And seriously, Tir, when you write in that lowercase I always interpret it as "cute, shy whisper." I have no idea why.

What do you usually try to convey by that literary maneuver anyway?

...I do not know, really. Maybe me issuing a small comment as context?
Subtext? Tiny details?

[AlleeCat]

On the subject of money, I've decided that I just want to make enough to live comfortably. Just enough that I can afford a few luxuries, but not so much that I'm living in a mansion and being waited on by personal servants. If I do somehow end up making enough for the latter, I'll probably just give it away or something.

[Knit tie]

Wealth is amazing. It buys me happiness. It creates a tangible proof of my existence. It gives my empty, useless life a semblance of meaning. That said, I see no real reason in pursuing it above all else.

Kittens are nice too.

[Gunner-Chan]

If I was stupidly rich, I totally admit I'd have a big castle and hire a bunch of hot maids to wait on me. But I'm also the kind of person that would want to do that just because I was so poor for most of my life and I'd love the idea of totally flipping that on it's head.

Happy where I am right now though.

^{The maid waifus are in my miiinnndddd~~~~}

[kisame12794]

I hoard money, simply because I don't actually do anything to spend it. I don't go out, I don't drive anywhere I don't need to go, I don't heat/cool the apartment. I suppose I do this because I want to build a stockpile so that I don't ever have to move back to my parents.

[Mr Space Cat]

I poke my head back in the thread and accidentally find people comforting me. You guys are too nice to random losers on the internet.

Thanks though. Feeling better. A crap ton of games while somewhat sleep deprived makes for a decent sedative. I also probably exhausted my feels tank.

-----

If I had a crapton of money, I don't know what I'd spend it on. Guess it'd be nice to not have to worry too much about it. Probably pay for college or housing or general life stuff.
Also buy all the guitar equipment ever. Gotta play 'em all, gotta play 'em all.

Also video games. Gotta play 'em all, gotta play 'em all.

NINJAEDIT:

...
self-deprecating.
...
I need to stop worrying so much about everything.

I know that feel bro.