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[Vattic]

Hmmm... How many meds have been tried? What about light therapy (you mentioned he's got a Toady-like rhythm)?

Depending on how bad the depression is, there's always opiates - very effective antidepressants with comparatively few side-effects, but of course they get you addicted as hell. You probably wouldn't find a doctor willing to write the necessary prescriptions.

With the two antipsychotics they were the last ditch at the time. He wants to change from the venlafaxine to another antidepressant, but he gets so infrequent meetings with his psychologist. The health system around here is sadly negligent. While he doesn't mind talking about his treatment he's not keen on talking with shrinks and it's never been offered. It's sad really as it seems medication is chosen because it's cheaper. It seems being a risk to society is one of the only reliable ways to get decent therapy.

[Descan]

Apparently there's a website, gofundme, that's basically a personal charity kickstarter.

'Course, I'll probably end up having to use it, because I have no idea how else I'll pay for university otherwise. :/

i hate trying to sell myself .____.


thisissadness

[Dutchling]

I thought Canada was socialist commie trash? Dx

[Descan]

Engineering tuition is still 10k per year on average, across most schools or at least the ones I looked at.

As an ontario student, I can (not guaranteed, but it's still pretty sure bet) get 30% off, and there are some government loans and grants, but I'll still be missing 4k for the year.

And that's not counting books and transportation.

[GiglameshDespair]

For me my student loan covers the university fee, but not the living: I have to pay for that myself because i'm not from a poor background. Would be buggered if my parents weren't covering a lot of it, though.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

I'm in kinda the same boat. Accepted into a private law school but not into the state school, and the private school would cost all of the loans I could get plus needing a good full-time job just to pay for tuition, and then another job to pay for living expenses.

One nice solution would be getting accepted into the state school. Alas.

[Descan]

Oh, yeah, that's the shitty thing. My mum makes 100k a year, so that counts against any loans I get from Ontario or Canada. Of course, we live paycheck to paycheck so there's no god-damn way she can afford even a tenth of it, but still.

At least I'll be able to knock living expenses off what I need to pay for. :/

[GiglameshDespair]

I'm sorry, but what's expensive enough someone making 100k needs to live paycheck to paycheck?

[LeoLeonardoIII]

It happens. Occasionally because you're living above your means, but perhaps you're stuck there - stuck in a house that's worthless now but your mortgage is super high for example. Or you have a lot of debt, such as medical debt. Child support. Dunno.

[SalmonGod]

It happens. Occasionally because you're living above your means, but perhaps you're stuck there - stuck in a house that's worthless now but your mortgage is super high for example. Or you have a lot of debt, such as medical debt. Child support. Dunno.

Gadgeted vigilante by night, perhaps.

[Max White]

If you are on that sort of pay statistically you are either the owner of a very small business, and then your running costs could easily become a burden, or you are highly qualified, and if you don't have a HECS the student loan repayments on top of house and car and all that jazz can start to bite.

[GiglameshDespair]

Yeah, it  was a genuine question. Not being a small business owner, having high qualifications (yet) or indeed even a high paying job means I don't know this sorta thing

[LeoLeonardoIII]

People also regularly do without when they don't have money for it. Once you do have money you can actually take care of your car, replace that water heater or washer/dryer, etc. Get insulation blown into the ceiling of the dojo and get heaters installed so your students don't freeze until dead.

Also everyone seems to have debt they pay off a little at a time. If you start making good money you can start paying that stuff off so you're in a better financial situation. But that means you don't actually have any extra money until you get your stuff paid. In the case of a car and house loan, student loans, and miscellaneous past bills, this can take a decade.

Banks don't loan you money so you can pay it back. They loan you money so you can pay them back for the rest of your life.

[Mr. Strange]

HUGS FOR THE HUG GOD!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[mastahcheese]

After I woke up, I took my wife to the eye doctor (whatever the heck their official title is.) I got a little lost on the way there, but it wasn't bad. The reason she went there is because, on top of everything else, she has now found out that she has cataracts. The doctor said he has no idea as to where they came from, because she's still young. So they're talking about doing some (what they call minor) surgery to remove it and add in some little lens thing that should also hopefully help with her bad vision as well. That sounds like a good plan.
For whatever reason, he was talking like he thinks that it'd be best to only do the worst eye, and leave the other one as it is. That makes no sense to me, as he even admitted that the other eye would continue to get worse, and would also need the same surgery in a year or two anyway. My wife wants to just get it done and over with, so it's rather annoying that they only want to do one. Hopefully we can convince them to take care of both of them.

They most likely want to do one at a time because she'll be blind for a while if they do both at once.

Yeah, I understand that bit, they normally do that. I'm saying that it makes no sense to wait multiple years in between.
But no, I know they aren't going to do both in a single day.

I'm going to hug all of you right now. I hope you are okay with that.

Let's definitely make it a party. I lurk this thread every day, and feel helpless that I can't help everyday.
Vector, Yoink, mastahcheese, etc - if any of you wants a game, for what little that's worth, just check the sig. Just pick anything you want to play that's on the list, no strings attached.

That's nice, but I don't really feel comfortable asking for things for myself. Maybe I'll consider it later, but thanks for the offer.

My heart goes out to you all. Here, catch, pass it around a bit, hot-potato style.

I'm beginning to think Bay12 should put together a hug-wagon that roams the globe and hugsqueezes the ever-loving crap out of everyone and what they're suffering from. It's a far cry from actual solutions, hardly feasible, and wholly impractical, but the internet is just such a grim and tinny way to offer condolences.

On an aside, I think we all need to learn to tell people "no" when they ask for and perhaps are not deserving of help, myself included. I know I tend to justify my suffering if it's to the growth or merit of another, and yet it's still a suffering.

Stay well, everyone.

I'd support this.
And yeah, I want to tell people "no" a lot, but I never can.

Now I can just imagine a dirty white van full of short, hairy people. "Bay12 comfort van" is written on the side in messy red paint, seemingly turning brown as it dries. They pull up next to sad people and, swigging from a stone flask, ask: "Want a hug?"

Then they hug people.

This made my day.

HUGS FOR THE HUG GOD!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also this.