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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9705030 times)

Scelly9

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61860 on: May 14, 2013, 11:53:13 pm »

*Hug, if your cool with that*
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Catsup

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61861 on: May 14, 2013, 11:56:52 pm »

Also kind of rude there, kitty cat.
i sincerely apologize, i dont know how to talk to ppl that well.

It is.  I really need to say some things to someone in my family, but I worry about "using up" their compassion.  They've only got so much time to be helpful, and there's no guarantee that they will be understanding.
use up? theres no limit to compassion, at most you'll annoy them for being too clingy.

NobodyPro

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61862 on: May 14, 2013, 11:59:13 pm »

Every time I meet someone who thought Epic Movie was a good movie, I die a little.
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Sirus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61863 on: May 15, 2013, 12:01:33 am »

You've met all three of them? Impressive.
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61864 on: May 15, 2013, 12:03:40 am »

I need to come out as trans.  I don't think they'll get it.  I don't think they'll want to get it.  It took years just to explain much simpler things to them.  It's hard enough for me to accept it.  How can I expect better from them?

The trouble is that my life has stalled.  I have no money.  I can't get a good job because I've been unemployed for too long.  I can't hold a job because I get harassed because I don't know how to conform to gender norms.  I need to be able to speak openly with someone, face to face.  I don't have that.  I'm not sure I've ever had that.  I can't do everything alone.  I tried, but things lose all their value when I'm isolated.

It doesn't always help and depends on what's available, but have you seen about getting a therapist* and/or support group? Just being able to talk with somebody about things has been a larger help to me than I thought it would. It should at least alleviate the feelings of isolation so you don't become stuck in a reclusive mire that only makes you feel more alienated over time.

Coming out to those close to you... it's a risk, especially if you're not in a stable financial position and have nobody to fall back on. While there are happy coming out stories you're not wrong to be worried about a bad reaction. Even families that come to accept it tend to take some time to process things. On the other hand, if it does work out well you sound like you're in a place that could really use the support they would provide.

* Better if they specifically mention dealing with trans issues because there are a lot of therapists who have no freakin' clue how to handle it.
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Ogdibus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61865 on: May 15, 2013, 12:25:27 am »

.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2013, 04:28:42 pm by Ogdibus »
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Skyrunner

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61866 on: May 15, 2013, 12:31:48 am »

Darnit, now I'm reminded of AP Environmental Science and AP Computer Science :(
The former I have to somehow master in 8 days, the latter same. And then there's a bunch of small events and project I have to handle... @_@
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Truean

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61867 on: May 15, 2013, 01:04:40 am »

I've looked into a therapists, but the cost is an issue.  Part of the problem with not coming out is that they expect me to recover from my psychological/emotional problems.  I can't address those without addressing my trans issues.  :<

Maybe I should move this to the advice section.

For what it's worth, I can relate pretty well to what you're saying. Been there; still there.

1.) Careful coming out to people if you are not financially stable and those people can negatively effect you or cut you off. The best way I've seen to deal with this is to think long term. In the short run, there isn't a whole heck of a lot you can do. If you require your family's support, then keeping that will help you do things later. Losing it will not....

2.) Gender norms and complying with them. This is difficult. You learn to fake it, basically. It's a terrible answer and one we should never have to deal with, but .... Speaking from personal experience, try not to become bitter about having to put up a front. Sadly, the world demands several things from most people that make no sense.

3.) Concerning the GLBT community: I'm unsure if its possible for you to have some connection to them, but if it is, making some friends among them might help. Most of them (especially the older ones) understand the idea of needing secrecy. However, this is not a universal thing.

4.) Therapy may be difficult if not incredibly difficult to acquire with limited resources. If you have a county mental health board or if there is a psychologist nearby, consider asking them for a referral after explaining your financial situation upfront: that you are broke.  There may be some sort of resource that can help. Granted, there may not be, but looking is half the battle.

5.) Hold on to hope. If you are like most people, you'll need this to keep going. There are possibilities you probably can't foresee, because nobody can. Perhaps you'll find a female friend who ends up being ok with cross dressing and transgender individuals. Maybe there might be a well hidden GLBT support group nearby. (This is highly location dependent). Maybe you might be able to get a couple of terrible jobs and work really hard to make up the time/wage (I get that this is incredibly difficult). Maybe later, in a few years, this economy might actually turn around and you'll get a good job. If you give up, you will never have a chance of winning.

That is, of course, unless you're like me and you tend to cling to hate instead of hope (not giving up because  doing so would prove certain people right when they said I was worthless). Either way, hang in there.
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Vattic

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61868 on: May 15, 2013, 01:37:26 am »

Every time I meet someone who thought Epic Movie was a good movie, I die a little.
The only film I walked out of. About half the people in there followed me out. I was only there because a load of folk from college were going to the cinema and the majority picked Epic Movie without anyone knowing what it was about beyond being a comedy.
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Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61869 on: May 15, 2013, 02:38:26 am »

I'm doing poorly enough that everyone around me can tell.  And I can't tell anyone why.

Great.  Good job, brain.
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Max White

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61870 on: May 15, 2013, 02:42:48 am »

Every time I meet someone who thought Epic Movie was a good movie, I die a little.
The only film I walked out of. About half the people in there followed me out. I was only there because a load of folk from college were going to the cinema and the majority picked Epic Movie without anyone knowing what it was about beyond being a comedy.
Lets face it, after Scary Movie we all should have known what was coming. Still not the worst comedy I have ever dragged myself through.
I'm pretty sure that one goes to Awesome Maximus. A movie I was forced to watch for my namesake. The entire thing wasn't just bad, it was an offensive piece of shit and I don't think at any point during the movie anybody who was watching it for the first time laughed. There were a select few fans who found it very amusing though.
Funnily enough, I am no longer in contact with those people.

Vattic

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61871 on: May 15, 2013, 03:00:17 am »

Lets face it, after Scary Movie we all should have known what was coming. Still not the worst comedy I have ever dragged myself through.
I'm pretty sure that one goes to Awesome Maximus. A movie I was forced to watch for my namesake. The entire thing wasn't just bad, it was an offensive piece of shit and I don't think at any point during the movie anybody who was watching it for the first time laughed. There were a select few fans who found it very amusing though.
Funnily enough, I am no longer in contact with those people.
Scary Movie and Epic Movie are by the same people? Should have guessed. Not seen Awesome Maximus, but it sounds wonderful.
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Sirus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61872 on: May 15, 2013, 03:01:10 am »

Scary Movie, Epic Movie, Romance Movie, etc were all made by the same people. How they continue making money to make more shitty films is a mystery for the ages.
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Max White

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61873 on: May 15, 2013, 03:04:54 am »

Apparently medium and mean aren't the same thing, and people who are smart tend to be very smart. So it stands to reason that the majority of people on earth have below average intelligence. When you make movies for the masses, you are onto a good business strategy.

Descan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #61874 on: May 15, 2013, 08:46:39 am »

I dunno, I can think of one or two "smart people" who liked it.

Of course, they think it's total shit, but they -liked- it.

Not anything I could replicate, they tend to be able to shut their brains off for cheap entertainment.

Me, meanwhile, has spent too much time watchin' internet review shows, SFDebris, and reading TVTropes.
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