So today I did this thing where my friend invited this guy over and talk with the two of us about setting up a tabletop RPG that we were supposed to get going at some point, he's apparently an experienced DM and was supposed to give us advice, and for god knows what reason, they decided to meet at Wendy's. Despite arriving at pretty much exactly the time everyone was supposed to be there I wound up waiting in a crowded Wendy's for a good half an hour before either of them showed up while people stared at me a lot (I've noticed people tend to stare at me a lot when I'm out in public, I'm not sure if it's an inordinately large amount, but it seems that way to me)... I was really uncomfortable with this and wanted to just go home. Then everything was finally together and they all started talking about it all and I just felt horribly awkward with everything.
Allegedly I'm supposed to be the brains behind the world we're building, but I honestly haven't a frigging clue what I'm doing. They also talked a lot about stuff like what character classes and races to have, and I just didn't really give a crap about any of that stuff, I don't mind if there's paladins or shadow paladins or whatever, I'll work with whatever's thrown at me. And I basically just wound up leaving without contributing much, and then later on she asked me to try making a basic, crude, map. But I'm having trouble even doing that. I know the general shape I want everything to be in, but I'm shit at putting it all together. I also can't draw worth a damn, I tried pulling up some random tool I picked up which seemed alright, but I can't seem to get anything halfway nice out of that either...
I feel like a pretty horrible failure right now.