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[The Darkling Wolf]

Have you verified that she's actually interested in this and not just smiling because she, as all people in the service industry do, has to?

[The Merchant Of Menace]

Yeah, Yumi has guys hitting on her all the time since starting her new job, despite making her feel sick to her stomach she still has to smile and pretend to be flattered.

[Hanslanda]

Hey, I got the cheesy stuff down pat. My favorite line is, "Have I told you that you're beautiful yet today?" If yes, then line is over. If no, then, "Well, that's because you're not beautiful. You're gorgeous."

Have you verified that she's actually interested in this and not just smiling because she, as all people in the service industry do, has to?

Yes, because she's my friend. She comes up and hugs me when I see her outside her job, and she bought me lunch the other day. I don't just randomly hit on people, m'kay?

[Reelya]

Yup, service industry are hoomans too, even though we often view them as servobots.

[kaijyuu]

Boo, girls like the cheesy stuff.

Some of us guys like it too

For reason number two, it's been a great many pages ago, but earlier in this thread I made a post on 'being addicted to feeling bad' or something along those lines. That I just feel better when I'm sitting on my hands and wallowing in my own pity, rather than doing the obviously obvious action of doing something to get out of my rut. I thought about this some more, and I think it might just be because my mind wants to confirm something to itself. It's true that I want to improve my life some how, and that I'm always keeping myself down somehow with my negative thinking, but there's a problem in that I'm not keeping the negative thinking to myself, I'm always sharing it with you guys. Why feel compelled to share these feelings, when I obviously just spout the defeatist crap like that above? That's where I think my mind just wants to confirm to itself that those feelings are valid, that I don't value my own opinion or trust my own judgment to confirm this thinking, so it needs confirmation that this thinking is valid from others. Why does it need confirmation? Because it wants to believe it made the right decision, that in believing that the world is terrible, that my situation was unwinnable, that I'm simply so deeply flawed that it can't be changed or challenged, it's negative affirmations are declared valid and it can finally rest easier. My mind rests knowing that there really wasn't anything I could do to change my life, so the massive burden of regret that I haul around everyday can finally be dissolved, and I just don't even need to worry anymore. I can live without having to worry about dying with all this regret, and that's a prize my subconscious just can't ignore, so it seeks the path of self-destruction.

You're not going to get any confirmation along those lines here. You tell us you're horrible and worthless, and we'll respond honestly by saying you're not.

My perspective on that line of thinking: I do the opposite. I insult myself publicly in the hopes of being wrong, so someone will correct me and validate me. I did that a lot when I first opened up here but have really been trying to crack down on that.

You insist that you're worthless, and that you want to be proven "right" that you are. Let me tell you that's the biggest thing you're wrong about, and if you want to be affirmed as making a correct deduction, you'll need to figure out that you have value.

[Ultimuh]

Well when I was younger, the older girls at the school I went to thought I was cute and all that.
But my aspergers made me not understand what was going on at the time.
Looking back I kinda regret I didn't take advantage of my "cute little boy" look. 
Then again, if I did that I could have gotten them into trouble.

[JoshuaFH]

For reason number two, it's been a great many pages ago, but earlier in this thread I made a post on 'being addicted to feeling bad' or something along those lines. That I just feel better when I'm sitting on my hands and wallowing in my own pity, rather than doing the obviously obvious action of doing something to get out of my rut. I thought about this some more, and I think it might just be because my mind wants to confirm something to itself. It's true that I want to improve my life some how, and that I'm always keeping myself down somehow with my negative thinking, but there's a problem in that I'm not keeping the negative thinking to myself, I'm always sharing it with you guys. Why feel compelled to share these feelings, when I obviously just spout the defeatist crap like that above? That's where I think my mind just wants to confirm to itself that those feelings are valid, that I don't value my own opinion or trust my own judgment to confirm this thinking, so it needs confirmation that this thinking is valid from others. Why does it need confirmation? Because it wants to believe it made the right decision, that in believing that the world is terrible, that my situation was unwinnable, that I'm simply so deeply flawed that it can't be changed or challenged, it's negative affirmations are declared valid and it can finally rest easier. My mind rests knowing that there really wasn't anything I could do to change my life, so the massive burden of regret that I haul around everyday can finally be dissolved, and I just don't even need to worry anymore. I can live without having to worry about dying with all this regret, and that's a prize my subconscious just can't ignore, so it seeks the path of self-destruction.

You're not going to get any confirmation along those lines here. You tell us you're horrible and worthless, and we'll respond honestly by saying you're not.

My perspective on that line of thinking: I do the opposite. I insult myself publicly in the hopes of being wrong, so someone will correct me and validate me. I did that a lot when I first opened up here but have really been trying to crack down on that.

You insist that you're worthless, and that you want to be proven "right" that you are. Let me tell you that's the biggest thing you're wrong about, and if you want to be affirmed as making a correct deduction, you'll need to figure out that you have value.

My post is more about attempting a dissection of my subconscious motivation than anything else. That said, your post about my post is kind of redundant. I mean, of course it's an obvious conscious imperative to assume that you have personal value, but in a contradicting sense, my subconscious has the desire to not have personal value so it can be freed from responsibility. That was what I was stabbing at, cause I feel better knowing 'why' and 'how' rather than just patting myself on the back and telling myself that it'll all get better, accepting nonchalant affirmations that I have value, and telling myself I'm just being a silly gilly depressed goose.

Though of course I'm appreciative of the support you provide here Kai. Like everything else in my life, it's a long difficult road ahead of me.

[kaijyuu]

Though of course I'm appreciative of the support you provide here Kai.

Sure thing. No need to thank me though, especially if you think I'm wrong or misinterpreting something. Keep calling me out if you feel like it, as you owe me nothing.

Like everything else in my life, it's a long difficult road ahead of me.

Life would be boring if it was easy :3

[Vorthon]

Dammit all this relationship stuff reminds me of how lonely I am.

[Levi]

Dammit all this relationship stuff reminds me of how lonely I am.

Reminds me of how lazy I am.   

[kaijyuu]

Dammit all this relationship stuff reminds me of how lonely I am.

So go make out with someone

[Vorthon]

But I'm ssssssssshhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyy!

[Ultimuh]

Well at least most of us here are lonely.. together!

..


And yet so far apart..

[Levi]

Video games give me all the companionship I need.

Ah FTL, you will never betray me.  Engi Ship Layout B and I will be together forever won't we.

*boom*

Nooo!  Why does FTL always betray me!  I'll never trust another game again!   

[Sirus]

You were expecting FTL to never betray you? FTL is the "spoiled rotten girl who constantly cheats on the protagonist" of the video game world. If you aren't dead in the first sector, that's only because the RNG has granted you temporary respite