Thank you all. [Soft, appreciative hugs to Vector, we're gonna lie and say without tears].
I really wanted to get drunk last night, but I'm glad I didn't. I know it's terrible for me. Truthfully, I'm not a very strong person, but I'm an exceptional liar about it. I will always feel it was partially my fault, for not seeing it, and perhaps for pushing him too hard. I'm simply supposed to be better than this and I'm not. We've all agreed not to tell anyone about him saying he'd leave the band.... I think maybe in his own way, he was trying to get us ready for his absence. I'm going to end up stuck doing the eulogy, [sigh]. Fuck it:
Tommy was a fire.
He caught in every way.
Blazed through any rain.
Time was the question:
how fast, how far, how long.
Tommy was a fire.
He caught in every one.
In this plastic people world,
fire spread though his song.
Tommy was a fire.
Light, warmth were our gain.
His song lessened our pain;
his own he'd never say.
Tommy was a fire.
Those flames he'd begun....
He came when we were frozen.
he left us burning up.
Tommy was a fire.
He's out but never done.
Ember memories still stir.
Our privilege to know.
Tommy was a fire.
Without him it'd colder, its darker.
Through this and any night,
we remember his warmth, his light.
Who knows, maybe I'll reform or shorten it, work it into something. I don't care. I'll figure something out. I
always mostly do. I've had similar things happen before, but I didn't know the people as long or as well as him. I really liked him. I know the pieces fit, but I've stopped trying to put them into place.
He knew everyone. I knew everything about him. He was real; everything right there on the label. There wasn't a mean bone in his body. He introduced me to the guy I'm dating now. He never cared and just wanted me to make him money. I did. He tried to get me to take more than my 10% and stop bothering him with accounting statements, and show bookings. I never did.
I'll tie this off at some point soon.