I feel immensely sad because it feels like everything is falling apart despite my best efforts and against its own interests. You'd rather destroy yourself and your friends/band than let me fix it...?
Do remember that whole 'let me fix it' thing is what prefaces a
lot of abusive relationships. Considering your line of work, I'd imagine you run into that a lot
Not saying the interaction between you two is abusive, mind, just noting the parallel. It's just a very dangerous line of thought to take when dealing with other humans, no matter how well intentioned. Especially for the one trying to fix things
You've made the offer, done what you can. You can't actually
stop someone from ruining themselves and the people around them if they don't
want to stop. You try to engender that desire if you can, but if that fails... better to contain the fallout as well as possible than try to stop a ship already sunk
In more mundane sadness, I'm about to go to sleep. Is about eight o'clock at night, which wouldn't be so bad if I slept a full eight hours, but the last half dozen or so times I've tried this I woke up between eleven and midnight, which honestly kinda' sucks, because it leaves me either going to sleep again at like six or seven (and sleeping 'till around noon) or completely frakking wrecked around and past midday. I hate needing to sleep, so much.