I'm freaking out. I hate myself so much right now.
God fucking damnit, all I want is to be left alone, not dragged to fucking parties where everyone smokes and not a single person gives a shit about my asthma.
I'm having an attack at the party, and I just can't breath. Not a single person gives a shit, so I think 'well I guess my life is in my hands now' and just call an ambulance without thinking since I forgot my emergency inhaler at home like a fucking retard, especially since I had an asthma attack the LAST TIME I came over to that fucking place. God fucking damnit.
Goddamnit I guess I forgot to ask them to be more subtle. Can you do that? Because it looks like a big fucking deal when a fire truck along with the paramedics roll up to the house. I have them help me, give me some help, help was involved. I appreciate people in that field, they're nice people, but I was completely fucking racked with anxiety and panic, since just the presence of spinning lights and a fucking fire truck have a tendency to make people panic. I really was not expecting that truck, it was overkill in the purest sense; just a paramedic on a moped with a satchel of what I needed would have sufficed, however unrealistic that expectation might have been.
So they take me into the ambulance and speak with me, and I'm having trouble breathing, but I'm still panicking because jesus christ I've never called an ambulance before and I don't know if I overreacted and I just ruined everyone's mood. I just don't know what the hell to do! This is bothering me so much and I'm trying to tell them about all this, but they're very nice and convince me that even with a breathing treatment, they'd like to take me to the hospital to get me checked out. So they convince me to go to the hospital with them.
After conversing with the very nice people at the hospital for a bit, I decide to just check myself out as quickly as possible because I'm just thinking that everyone's angry at me, and my Mom comes to pick me up.
Then she tells me something I didn't quite know, which was that an ambulance costs alot of money. She threw some bullshit figure in the thousands at me, but me doing my own research suggests somewhere in the hundreds of dollars range, and that my insurance might not cover because it "wasn't an emergency because you were released right away". Now I'm quaking in fear, because I don't want my little money, the money I worked for before coming back to this terrible place to get squandered on something so asinine! I heard there were payments though, but I'm panicking so much right now.
Dammnit, I'm so stupid. I hate everyone and I hate myself.
Yeah, Josh, so long as you're insured they should cover most, if not all, of the expenses... including the ambulance.
But still, that whole situation sucks. Yeah, it's important to learn from the past (IE keep an inhaler handy), but don't beat yourself up about it, and don't fixate your view on what went wrong in the past. That will not make the present situation better. The best thing to do, once you identified what went wrong and how to avoid it in the future, is to just take a step back, identify the things that are worrying you (IE. ambulance cost), and brainstorm ways of resolving it... like getting contact information for hospital and insurance company, checking what is and isn't covered by your policy, and if all else fails talk to the hospital about payment plans for the underinsured.
One way or another, it will be fine.
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9743848 times)