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[Vattic]

Work is really getting me down. Our workload is increasing, none of the head managers have worked nights before, they don't seem to think we do anything, nothing but critique has lead to poor morale, and now they are talking about putting us on flexible contracts. The local area has a lack of job opportunities for someone without anything but useless A levels otherwise I'd get another job. The sad thing is that this job was really peachy but steadily got worse and worse. Despite the complaints there are plenty of positives: long weekends, reasonable pay, and it's within walking distance. I suppose I should figure out what I want for the future and likely go back into education with the savings I've amassed but I'm scared to take the leap.

I'd rather not do that to somebody who is a lot taller and a lot heavier than me, especially when he posesses the reasoning of a elementary school kid.

That's a shame but laxatives might be amusing. I'd of done it myself but I had a debit card stolen so there's nowhere to hide them.

[Taco Dan]

The rule is anything with fur in Australia is safe. Except furry spiders.

That's a lie. Koalas have fur, and they're mean little bastards.

[Reelyanoob]

Well, they don't like being picked up and they have sharp claws to hang onto trees, so you right there.
and they're so cute humans can't resist trying to pick them up.

[scriver]

Kangaroos hace fur too, non? Because it's Australia. Even your herbivores are deadly. Even your cuddlythings will fuck you up.

Contrast Sweden - only one poisonous non-insect (a snake, hell we only have two kinds of snake anyway, and a lizard without legs), no harmfully poisonous spiders or other small critters, let alone any deadly. Even our damn bears are benign.

Yeah, Australia scares the crap out of me.

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

The rule is anything with fur in Australia is safe. Except furry spiders.

Spotted Qoulls are the largest marsupial carnivore on the mainland:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's right, the insects and spiders ATE all the dangerous carnivores.

[Max White]

The rule is anything with fur in Australia is safe. Except furry spiders.

Spotted Qoulls are the largest marsupial carnivore on the mainland:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dude... Duuude,
Platypus - Males have poison spurs on back legs.
Kangaroos - Can become territorial and rip a human limb for limb.
Feral dogs/Dingos - 'nuff said.
Phascogale - Little things WILL RIP YOUR HAND OFF given the chance. DO NOT TRUST.
Possums - Normally sky little critters, but can become fat from hand outs from tourists, and sociable, and when they do they have been known to accidently cause very serious cuts from their massive claws when they try to climb your leg like a tree.
Wombats - Big, grumpy, and pack a mean bite.
People who pick up hitch-hikers - Deadly little SOBs, watch out for them.

[Reelyanoob]

Heh, pretty funny, but how infrequent are deaths by even the most dangerous Australian wild-life?

I note that 10 Americans a year die by Rattlesnake bites, and Alligators kill Americans too.
Those 2 animals alone outnumber the Australians killed by wildlife in decades.

Crocodiles - Very Deadly, but just don't go swimming in the Far North Tropics. These are all over the world, North Africa, Asia etc
Funnel-Web Spiders: 27 death in 100 years. And most of that was before anti-venoms were invented.
Redback Spiders : 14 deaths in Australian History, NONE recorded since 1984 when anti-venom invented.
Taipan (snake) : No reported human deaths ever, even after being bitten
Kangaroo : Only one recorded human death in 1936, though they can cause car accidents if you swerve or hit them.
Platypus "capable of causing severe pain to humans.". Non-lethal, just hurts like hell for 90 minutes.
Feral Dogs/Dingos - EVERYWHERE has feral dogs. Australian ones aren't even as big as wolves.
Possums - REALLY?? Get a grip, they're like squirrels. I've fed them and their claws are not that massive, no more than a cat.
Wombats - Never killed a human. Some kid in the 60's used to crawl down their burrows and never got mauled. He wrote a book.

Hitchhiking - Now THAT'S Dangerous. But the same thing has happened in UK, France, USA, Russia Etc

[Max White]

Shhhh
Your unscaring the tourists.

[Reelyanoob]

I read that because American's fire shotguns at anything that rattles, rattlesnakes have rapidly evolved to be silent, making them even more deadly.(The rattle was to scare predators away, advertise their venom, now it says "just shoot me", and it's easier to lose a trait than gain one).

[Angel Of Death]

Your unscaring the tourists.

Let him. There's nothing to be afraid of in Australia.

On a sadder note, the hitchhikers in my shed are starting to smell bad.

_{Be afraid of us!}

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Shhhh
Your unscaring the tourists.

WOW, YOUR AUSTRALIA SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT PLACE. I THINK I MIGHT JUST GO THERE. AND BRING ALL OF MY AMERCIAN FRIENDS WITH ME. FROM AMERICA.

(So, would you like to begin screaming in horror now, or when I get there?)

[Angel Of Death]

Shhhh
Your unscaring the tourists.

WOW, YOUR AUSTRALIA SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT PLACE. I THINK I MIGHT JUST GO THERE. AND BRING ALL OF MY AMERCIAN FRIENDS WITH ME. FROM AMERICA.

From America?

BLASPHEMY. No, seriously, at least 80% of Australians you will meet despise America. Well, at least 80% that I meet.

I'm sad because most people I know hate Americans.

[Max White]

WOW, YOUR AUSTRALIA SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT PLACE. I THINK I MIGHT JUST GO THERE. AND BRING ALL OF MY AMERCIAN FRIENDS WITH ME. FROM AMERICA.

(So, would you like to begin screaming in horror now, or when I get there?)

Are we talking maple syrup, sweater wearing, using 'eh' in every sentence, and sometimes mistaken for French american? Or the other kind?

[Reelyanoob]

Just remember to say "Wow Austria's warmer than I thought it would be, and a lot flatter, where's all the castles?"

[MetalSlimeHunt]

WOW, YOUR AUSTRALIA SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT PLACE. I THINK I MIGHT JUST GO THERE. AND BRING ALL OF MY AMERCIAN FRIENDS WITH ME. FROM AMERICA.

(So, would you like to begin screaming in horror now, or when I get there?)

Are we talking maple syrup, sweater wearing, using 'eh' in every sentence, and sometimes mistaken for French american? Or the other kind?

I forget, maybe we should consult my profile.

Location: Raleigh, North Carolina, United States of America