Why can't we all have sadness fall off us like water?
Dunno, and I sure wish I knew. I'm sad at the moment because of... well, the usual ex-related stuff. I realize more and more that he's either a walled city or one of the shallowest individuals I have ever met. In either case, I've suddenly become able to feel the walls around him, which I never recognized before. They're the same walls I felt while we were dating. The relationship I invested so much into was a total joke, from start to finish. More of a joke than I mentioned last week. I didn't understand last week.
I end up frightened that the man I'm looking for doesn't exist. There's no really good reason to believe that, but I fear it all the same. I'm not looking for some super-handsome, rich, and charming guy, either. Just curiosity! That's pretty much it, at this point. "NEWSFLASH: Honest man found. Now looking for curious man. Insufferable bores need not apply." But how many people in this world have genuine, burning curiosity, anyway? Are they all like this "everything in moderation" jerk, who can never hear about a good thing but feel a need to cut it down?
What's more, I don't know what the hell I'm doing here talking about it. Maybe because I'm young and stupid, but at least here I feel I can explain what's going on--and all I want to do is explain. Find a hole and shout down it "KING MENELAUS HAS ASS'S EARS" or something like that.
Been a while since I've read mythology, but wasn't that King Midas... or perhaps Pinocchio? Either or, it's all Greek to me.
Anyway, I find the internet a good place to shout some things. Unlike yelling to the wind in the forest somewhere, your message is sure to reach living, thinking people... and maybe, if you're lucky, they'll find value in your words. They may even be able to help, like I'm trying to now. Even if not, it's a safe place to voice your opinions, and compare them with a broad base of peoples, and in so doing, better understand what you feel.
When you distance yourself from the thing itself, and think about the internet, we live in a fascinating and wonderful time to be able to converse, think, and "live" our days with people whom we may never meet, or ever have had a chance of meeting. It broadens our window to the world, and brings its people and its ideas closer together than they've ever been in human history.
Anyway, I try to surround myself with curious people... (heh... in more than one sense, actually, since a good number of my friends are quite weird). As such, I can assure you that curious people are out there. If you're referring not just to people who have strong interests, but rather to people who fuel their lives with the thirst to know, or who build their lives around learning, understanding, synthesizing, and knowing, I can rattle off a few from the top of my head.
Jacob Bronowski and
Carl Sagan were incredible, inspirational men, and I'd put both of them in that category; they had genuine compassion, a thirst to learn, and a desire to share that learning with others... people who lived for everyone, by feeling forward from the brink of the known, into what is to be hoped. To live like that is a personal aspiration of mine, and (perhaps its the idealist in me) but which I feel many others likely share as well. The biggest trouble, I imagine, is finding them. Though I've had little luck in my own search for similar things, I try to be patient, and keep looking and waiting as necessary.
In short, inquisitive and passionate people are out there, so don't despair over one failed trial. It's like an experimental hypothesis disproved; you may not have found the answer you were looking for, but you still come out of the experiment wiser, and more capable to find one that fits what you were looking for in the future.
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9704804 times)