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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9496365 times)

Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4665 on: April 21, 2010, 12:46:23 pm »

Well, you could try getting involved in D&D yourself so at least you can appreciate the references, but it the worst of it will hopefully not last too long. It isn't unusual for someone just exploring something(or even returning to something, to some extent) to become a little obsessive. I suspect that it might be the same thing as addictions, it starts off by discovering something that the individual is a little overwhelmed by for some reason, then they spend a while trying to recreate the 'buzz' from the first experience, and then, hopefully, they sort of feel they've explored it and end up at a point somewhere between 'sustain it' and 'avoid it'. But this is all ignorant conjecture, suffice it to say that hopefully they will not be obsessed with D&D for as long as they engage in it...

I've already played and enjoyed some D&D, dude.  I've made a fair number of jokes about it, and she's recognized that she talks about D&D way too much.

Problem one is that her addiction cycles tend to last 6 to 7 years or so on full blast, with no diminishing, until something gets in their way (this has happened with perhaps 3 other things, to date).  Problem two is that we both have fairly shitty social skills, which can make things rather difficult at times.  I.e., we both start injecting paragraphs to explain our intentions and design behind each statement we make.  Eventually the misunderstanding gets sorted out, but it can be an awkward ten minutes.

It's okay--I like this girl, and I missed her when we weren't talking.  It's mostly that she's a bit tough to talk to right now, because previously we discussed literary analysis (something with which we were both completely obsessed) and nowadays she talks at me about D&D and I listen.  To be fair, I think it's karma biting me in the ass for all the times I did similar things, but I'm kind of hoping I'll be able to navigate my way around this into some sort of actual friendship.


So, I'm writing a novel, and as soon as I read that, one of my characters just started monolouging in my head about how your problem was having too many problems. The word "multiplicitudes" was used more than once. I'm not sure if it's hilarious or in poor taste, because as of this moment, it's 3AM and I can't get to sleep.

Nah, I realized that a little while ago.  I'm slowly working through them, though--note how there's been fewer posts about being ludicrously depressed and/or my parents?  That's getting better, and I'm feeling a lot happier already.  Things are much better, actually.  By the end of the 9 months off, I should be completely stable at long last.  In a bit under a year and a half, I think I may manage most of the transition out of childhood.  Phew.


And Vector- Hurry up and get on Steam already, so's we can entertain you.

My father's been told he has until Saturday to buy his own damn copy of Colonization before I start pestering him mercilessly.  Of course, I need to get my own backlog of stuff done before then, because otherwise he'll just pull the "you're not being responsible, so I don't have to be responsible" line to cover his ass.

Meh, it should be taken care of by Sunday or so =)  Thanks for all the help, dudes.



Also, if you're one of the many people who have been sending me PMs to which I haven't been responding: I am really sorry.  I don't hate you, I am just extremely lazy.  I think about you frequently and need to get off my ass to go respond to you kind folks.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

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Solifuge

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4666 on: April 21, 2010, 12:48:43 pm »

More like "mildly irritated," but my friend Thyme can't talk about anything but D&D.  At all.  I am not exaggerating.  Every subject I bring up turns into D&D almost immediately (i.e. within 4-5 IM replies, most of the time).  This includes computer games, recreational mathematics (which is theoretically another one of her interests), pure mathematics (sadly only my interest, mostly discussed in terms of "why your textbook sucks and you shouldn't worry about failing your analysis course"), books, music, and whatever else I care to mention.  Oh, and her crush.  When she mentions her crush, the conversation turns into D&D again within a couple of lines.

You know the worst part of all this?  She's going to be doing this for three more years or more, because that's how long it'll take her to leave the university with the nifty D&D group (and she wants to keep living in the area later so she can continue to play).  But if she stops playing, she'll get really depressed again...

Dammit, Thyme.  You used to be so cool and interested in... you know... books, games, stories.  Now I've got only three people to talk to, and one of them is you.  My old best friend.  The person I've known for perhaps 10 years now, who is now a stranger because she can talk about absolutely nothing but her D&D group.  Not the novel she's been working on for 8 years.  Not the webcomic she drew until a little bit ago.  Not mutual experience with being two profoundly lonely young women.  Not shared long-distant memories.

No, just fucking mindflayers and how everyone around her is a genius, smarter than the people she knows back home, etc.  Is that ALL you can talk about?  D&D and your massive superiority complex?  For chrissakes.  I don't know about the goddamned wedge product, no, but that is not because I don't go to her university, and it's not because I'm not a savant.  She has some sort of illusion where everything from her school is covered in gold, where almost every student is a genius without compare, where every department is polished in the extreme.  Good god, woman.  Do you even know what a math department looks like?  Generally, it has less applied and more actual studying, i.e., one is typically required to take a course in complex analysis and so on, and there is at least a foray into Foundations, logic, and so on.  Bleh.


It's this kind of bullshit that makes me want to go back and talk to Rosewood, but that's just because I'm feeling kinda lonely at the moment and I really want a buddy to hang out with =/  I'm not going to.  Don't worry.  I am sticking to those guns.  I'll get more social contact soon, and if worst comes to worst I can just go read French plays by myself or classify finite groups.  Hwah.

And yeah... I know I complain too much.  But I'm honestly scared of asking her to discuss something else, since changing the subject doesn't work and I can't afford to just go lose a friend right now.  I'll have to think about this a little.

This is meant as helpful, so please don't color it wrong, but the largest percentage of your posts reeference mathematics religiously. You don't often go more than 5 lines talking about non-math things, and when you do it's in regards to emotional issues between you and your family or friends. Granted, this is based primarily on occasional reading of the Sad/Happy threads, and only on this forum, but it's something you do. It's hard to say this without sounding like an asshat, but I hope you understand. I'm just trying to give you some perspective.

People tend to gravitate toward their interestes. I tend to consume my free time with storytelling, gaming, and my studies, with the odd comic or novel reading... as such, when I'm around my friends, it's what I tend to talk about and share. I happily listen to my friends talk about other things, and it's fun to hear about their interests and passions too, but it's not something I can chat about with them since I don't necessarily share their experience.

Even so, if you're not keen to talk about D&D, just tell her. Being passive, and letting it happen only to complain about it to other people on the internet doesn't improve your communication with your friend at all, nor does it resolve the situation. It's a great way to vent the frustration... but it defeats the purpose of you experiencing that frustration; it's your body's way of trying to get you to tackle the problem, by putting a dampener on your worries about how that might make her feel, etc... because if you worry about how others feel too much, you'll never be able to do anything that helps yourself. It's all based on the same, primitive survival behavior, just adapted to the social world we now live in.

Just let her know, respectfully and directly, that you'd like to talk about something other than D&D for a change, and if she acts embarrased or thretened, just let her know it's fine, but that you're just a bit worn out on the subject. If it's a friendship worth its salt, I doubt anything bad will come of it, and it'll help her too since she wouldn't want to frustrate you, and probably doesn't know she has been, especially if you haven't mentioned it.



Anywho, tangentially related to math, I'm apparently transferring into my new school at the lowest rung of the mathematics tree, because it's been 5 years since I've taken a math course. My only hope is to kick ass at the placement test, and test into at least college algebra (ideally I can test into Calculus), or I'll be stuck taking a year of math classes before I can even start on my major.

Blahrgh! Time to remember how to do a darned factorial.
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Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4667 on: April 21, 2010, 01:26:00 pm »

This is meant as helpful, so please don't color it wrong, but the largest percentage of your posts reeference mathematics religiously. You don't often go more than 5 lines talking about non-math things, and when you do it's in regards to emotional issues between you and your family or friends. Granted, this is based primarily on occasional reading of the Sad/Happy threads, and only on this forum, but it's something you do. It's hard to say this without sounding like an asshat, but I hope you understand. I'm just trying to give you some perspective.

People tend to gravitate toward their interestes. I tend to consume my free time with storytelling, gaming, and my studies, with the odd comic or novel reading... as such, when I'm around my friends, it's what I tend to talk about and share. I happily listen to my friends talk about other things, and it's fun to hear about their interests and passions too, but it's not something I can chat about with them since I don't necessarily share their experience.

Even so, if you're not keen to talk about D&D, just tell her. Being passive, and letting it happen only to complain about it to other people on the internet doesn't improve your communication with your friend at all, nor does it resolve the situation. It's a great way to vent the frustration... but it defeats the purpose of you experiencing that frustration; it's your body's way of trying to get you to tackle the problem, by putting a dampener on your worries about how that might make her feel, etc... because if you worry about how others feel too much, you'll never be able to do anything that helps yourself. It's all based on the same, primitive survival behavior, just adapted to the social world we now live in.

Just let her know, respectfully and directly, that you'd like to talk about something other than D&D for a change, and if she acts embarrased or thretened, just let her know it's fine, but that you're just a bit worn out on the subject. If it's a friendship worth its salt, I doubt anything bad will come of it, and it'll help her too since she wouldn't want to frustrate you, and probably doesn't know she has been, especially if you haven't mentioned it.



Anywho, tangentially related to math, I'm apparently transferring into my new school at the lowest rung of the mathematics tree, because it's been 5 years since I've taken a math course. My only hope is to kick ass at the placement test, and test into at least college algebra (ideally I can test into Calculus), or I'll be stuck taking a year of math classes before I can even start on my major.

Blahrgh! Time to remember how to do a darned factorial.

I thank you for the advice.  I realize that I tend to mostly talk about mathematics, to be sure, but I'm trying to get away from that.  I may be failing, to be sure, but I'm honestly trying.  There's a couple of other people I talk to online, and I don't have this problem with them >_>  I generally get along fine without mentioning math at all.

... I realize that sounds defensive, but I'll admit that I have a problem.

Mostly, it's that I don't know how to talk about anything but mathematics in a sustainable way--so I'm attempting to learn how to engage in small talk, but she is being distinctly non-helpful and has informed me that she refuses to turn on any filigree.  If that doesn't make too much sense, it basically means that she's not going to ask how I'm doing, what's happening in my life, or about anything that pertains to me whatsoever.  She also reserves the right to talk about D&D whenever the hell she chooses (which is, in her words, "whenever she can.").

There isn't much of a way to get around this right now, dude.  I don't have the friend-clout to ask her to do something else, nor the recent shared experience to think up another attractive topic of conversation.  Right now I'm just watching, waiting, and gathering data until I can find an opening.

Furthermore, the only sort of mathematical discussion in which I engage is directly related to what she, herself, has brought up--perhaps even in reference to the mathematical puzzles she solves in Dungeons and Dragons.  Rather than having a satisfying conversation about crypto (something about which I know almost nothing--it's applied--and she theoretically knows rather a lot) we can only talk about how impressive she is in the context of D&D crypto decodes of the past.  She brings up the analysis course she's failing, and then she's not really interested in talking about that, either.

The only other math I've talked about was a passing "damn, I'm lazy and need to get back to doing math."  And a brief rant about the wedge product, but that was her fault.  She was the one who brought up multiple integration, not me.

So... in any case, we're kind of stuck together right now, because both of us are on the lonely side.  I'll figure something out, but I'm a bit pissed--at least the kid I knew with crippling autism could talk about three things, which generated much pleasant conversation :I  And no, none of them was math.  She's testably retarded in mathematics.


Yes, I sound extremely defensive, but I'm going a little bit batty, here.  In any case, if you want to talk about mathematics in preparation for your exam--or, hell, about storytelling or novels or anything else--I would much appreciate the opportunity.
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ToonyMan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4668 on: April 21, 2010, 01:41:34 pm »

People are trying to "help" me, I dislike this.
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Gunner-Chan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4669 on: April 21, 2010, 02:00:49 pm »

Just feeling oddly apathetic today...

Screw it. Ill just play borderlands or something for a few hours.
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bjlong

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4670 on: April 21, 2010, 02:11:46 pm »

People are trying to "help" me, I dislike this.

TOONYMAN TELL ME OF YOUR PROBLEMS

THEY INTEREST ME
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Hoborobo234

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4671 on: April 21, 2010, 02:29:18 pm »

I realise it is only 3 weeks until the end of school and the girl I like moving to College whilst I stay in 6th form
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ToonyMan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4672 on: April 21, 2010, 02:37:05 pm »

People are trying to "help" me, I dislike this.

TOONYMAN TELL ME OF YOUR PROBLEMS

THEY INTEREST ME

All of these anti-transcendentals are trying to put The Me down!
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smigenboger

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4673 on: April 21, 2010, 05:41:06 pm »

Borderlands was fun for a couple of (long) days. It reminded me of Guild Wars, but I'm not sure why. Could have used a little more testing time too. And storyline, etc. Still, was fun though.

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Aqizzar

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4674 on: April 21, 2010, 05:58:32 pm »

Kinda annoyed with myself that I knew it was my mother's birthday, but I had to be reminded to go out and do something for her.  Now I can't decide if I want to go meet her for dinner as would be expected, or stay home and do bullshit for a few hours instead.

Enrollment problems in college.  I'm not exactly sure if I'm upset about this, but it's not what I was expecting.  There was this class that I not only wanted but needed to take this fall.  It's a required class for all Political Science majors, but it's only offered in literally one section every other semester.  It's also taught by a really cool and easy professor I wanted to take.  7-10 Thursday nights notwithstanding.  Needless to say, as of mid-April it was already booked solid.  I still managed to enroll in the alternate course, which is at a more reasonable hour, also taught by a cool professor (or so I hear), and centered around material I'd probably find more interesting.  All the same, it's not what I originally wanted.  Meh.

Related to schooling, I also found out my grandmother (and college bankroll) was pretty sure I was an incompetent boob coasting my way through school on her investment and accomplishing nothing, like most of my cousins.  She's been convinced otherwise by that Awesome Paper award I won, but I still can't prove her wrong.  Five years of college as of this summer, 2.4 GPA, and my bachelor's degree is still 18 hours away and not exactly a sure thing.  Praise is meaningless to me, because I always know just how incompetent I am.
« Last Edit: April 21, 2010, 06:02:25 pm by Aqizzar »
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Grakelin

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4675 on: April 21, 2010, 06:53:44 pm »

So, Vector, you wanna get a game of D&D going or something?
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Okay, so, today this girl I know-Lauren, just took a sudden dis-interest in talking to me. Is she just on her period or something?

ToonyMan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4676 on: April 21, 2010, 06:56:28 pm »

Shut up Aqizzar you're better than that.
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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4677 on: April 21, 2010, 07:13:11 pm »

Shut up Aqizzar you're better than that.
We all know this, but we can never really accept it. The thought that it may be true seems unlikely to our cold, analytical hearts. It is something I fear, and something I'm sure will happen for me sometime in the future.

 But yeah, rock on Aqizzar.
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ToonyMan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4678 on: April 21, 2010, 07:16:40 pm »

That god damn anti-transcendentalism is screwing with Aqizzar again, we have to put a stop to it.
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warhammer651

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #4679 on: April 21, 2010, 07:19:48 pm »

I had Chemistry today. With a teacher that knows what she's talking about, but can't explain it to the rest of us.
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