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[smigenboger]

The drunken high is coming down...it's not so fun without the opposite sex around. I may have to reserve getting double-vision for when there's the appropriate outlet available. Looks like I may have to re-develop my social life once again...

[Tack]

I must admit to feeling rather sad about something.
During my lying-in-bed-staring-at-ceiling time today, I realized something that I should really think through. I may have to adjust my thinking and moral systems.

Hey! You have 'lying-on-bed-staring-at-ceiling' time too? Cool.

Also, internet is DOWN on my laptop. Apart from the fact that I cut out halfway through a conversation with Janet, this also makes me sad because I was halfway through downloading a fair bit of stuff.
Seriously, this fucking internet needs to stop being so dodgy. It's very ARGH.

[Smitehappy]

Slowling being consumed by apathy bordering on nihilism as I deal with being repeatedly told that while I may have been accepted into college with a 2.2 GPA and a 31 on my ACT, my poor grades should still be worked on as they might recind my acceptence. I make the arguement that they were already aware of my 2.2 GPA when I sent in my transcript and was still accept. My father and "Guidence Consular" counter with "You're too young to understand, we've been through college before. I wish you would just realize that's the way life works".

I'm told I'm "special", that they know I'm intelligent because of my testing scores but I'm just not showing it in my grades.  I then point out that what do grades matter when I've proved I gained knowledge with my ACT score and testing scores. Isn't acquisition of knowledge the point of the education system? My "Guidence Counsular" tell me it is in fact not the point of an education system. "I'm still not getting "it""

I then state that I'd be happier if I did what I thought was important, even if that meant not applying myself at school or doing what they wanted me to. I'm told this is incorrect and I won't infact make me happy. I'm also lazy apparently. And still not getting "It".

I'm then told again that I'm much better then average and that I should really apply myself in school to show it. I tell them that if they already know I'm smart then why do they need me to show it with a pretty "A" on a piece of paper. They tell my I'm not seeing the obvious picture here.

I ask them if maybe they've considered that I may be right, since I'm so intelligent. What make them smarter then me if I'm so "Gifted". Maybe I've come up with my own way of living life. Maybe I'd be miserable if I did what they asked of me, settling for doing things I don't believe in or care about for the rest of my life. Not putting up any kind of fight for what I think should and should not be. I of course am still not seeing "It", as I am just a child and know nothing of how life works.

My favorite part comes when I'm treated to five minutes of my Dad and Consular talking to eachother like I'm not in the room, on effective ways to make me see "It" or make me less "Lazy". Of my Dad telling my how dissapointed he is. It's at this point where I realize how detached I've become. My own father is sitting in a room talking about how sad and dissapointed he is that I've become the person I am I don't feel anything more than a slight contempt towards him.

I'm tired. I don't know how to put it any other way. 12 years in the education system has drained me of any sort of motivation to care. It's destroyed my ability to view my Dad with anything resembling what a normal person sees in their own father. There's no respect, no admiration, not even an ounce of good will. I see nothing but I a man I'm forced to endure simply because I'm dependant on him. I sometimes find myself wishing I wasn't who I am, wishing I could just see what "It" was, wishing I could be happy just doing what I'm told.

This isn't a cry for help, most of my life brings me an abudent amount of joy. I'm looking forward to my life after High School where I can pursue the career I want (Computer Networking) and my girlfriend/Best Friend of 2 years has always found ways to keep me happy when everything else fails. Nor is it a declaration of some sort of cause. I don't really see most people agreeing with me or changing the school system in the short time I'm still here. This is just me being me, a reminder to myself later in life of who I was at the time and a way to blow off steam.

[Tack]

Hi. I saw what you wrote, and I'd just like to say, that you aren't (weren't) alone in this. In, pretty much all of it.

1. 'It' is something that really only school-leavers can see. When I was in school I had pretty much the exact same viewpoint, buut, now that I'm out, I know exactly what 'it' is. 'It' is the realisation that you just didn't do enough, that you could have tried so much harder, and gotten a great grade, that you could have been proud talking to all of your mates once you left school, when they (and they will) ask you 'What GPA did you get?". 'It' is both the biggest hunk of bullshit, and a very painful revelation. Believe me, you may be able to get into the course you want. May. But, after that, what about a job? Believe me, if the people in the job and the people in the uni have to make a choice between a 4.0 and a 2.2, it's quite obvious what you want to get, and, although you may be 'above the bar' for your specific course, doesn't mean that you're actually going to get in. However - I can understand that if I were to be still in school now, I'd still be slacking off, because, pretty much, 13 years of school just Fuck Your Mind Over. Maybe your guidance counsellor and Dad are just too old to realize that.

2. Apathy and a loss of connection with your parents comes at that age. It'll pass, but, for now, hate your parents - Go to parties - spend amazing amounts of time in your room. I mean, you're a teenager, you're basically entitled to this shit. Start giving cheek to adults, get a wierd haircut. Sure, maybe a little old lady won't get into an elevator with you, but it'll be fucking hilarious when you challenge everyone's preconceptions. Also, 'lazy' is another thing you're allowed to have when you're a teen. As long as you kick into gear when it's time to move out, it really doesn't matter.

3. 'Gifted' is something you shouldn't really take for granted. If you can pick stuff up quickly, if you are fairly good at subjects now, really good if it's interesting, and amazingly good when you truly knuckle down on it, then you'll know what I mean. Sure, gifted is boring, but I bet you'd rather be gifted than not, so quit wasting it.


With all that said, I'm not the best role-model. But, I was in your situation about 11 months ago, so I can empathise.

[RAM]

the world is becoming a little bit clearer.

Stop! Stop now! It isn't worth it!

I am sad today because the cosmic horrors are going to devour everything, nothing, and everything else...

[Tack]

Sad because I nearly have finished Meritous.
But I can't.

See, fact of the matter is, unless you do everything in a Particular order, an order designed to make the game next-to impossible, you can't beat the final boss. It's impossible.
I mean, there's a limited amount of enemies in the entire game, so you can't even grind.

[Neonivek]

UGH I am soooooo sick!

Puked 6-12 times last night and had other problems, that would be too vulgar to mention, all night.

I have had almost no sleep and I have a headache and my limbs hurt.

I wanted to buy a game today but it isn't looking likely

[Vector]

the world is becoming a little bit clearer.

Stop! Stop now! It isn't worth it!

I am sad today because the cosmic horrors are going to devour everything, nothing, and everything else...

>_________>

Yes, yes it is worth it.  If I work hard enough, I'll be able to get everything I ever wanted.  So I'm working.

[smigenboger]

I had trouble dealing with my parents until I moved out, then everything sort of shifted back to the way people normally communicate. Living with people puts a huge strain on the relationship, at least in me

[Cthulhu]

Slowling being consumed by apathy bordering on nihilism as I deal with being repeatedly told that while I may have been accepted into college with a 2.2 GPA and a 31 on my ACT, my poor grades should still be worked on as they might recind my acceptence. I make the arguement that they were already aware of my 2.2 GPA when I sent in my transcript and was still accept. My father and "Guidence Consular" counter with "You're too young to understand, we've been through college before. I wish you would just realize that's the way life works".

I'm told I'm "special", that they know I'm intelligent because of my testing scores but I'm just not showing it in my grades.  I then point out that what do grades matter when I've proved I gained knowledge with my ACT score and testing scores. Isn't acquisition of knowledge the point of the education system? My "Guidence Counsular" tell me it is in fact not the point of an education system. "I'm still not getting "it""

I then state that I'd be happier if I did what I thought was important, even if that meant not applying myself at school or doing what they wanted me to. I'm told this is incorrect and I won't infact make me happy. I'm also lazy apparently. And still not getting "It".

I'm then told again that I'm much better then average and that I should really apply myself in school to show it. I tell them that if they already know I'm smart then why do they need me to show it with a pretty "A" on a piece of paper. They tell my I'm not seeing the obvious picture here.

I ask them if maybe they've considered that I may be right, since I'm so intelligent. What make them smarter then me if I'm so "Gifted". Maybe I've come up with my own way of living life. Maybe I'd be miserable if I did what they asked of me, settling for doing things I don't believe in or care about for the rest of my life. Not putting up any kind of fight for what I think should and should not be. I of course am still not seeing "It", as I am just a child and know nothing of how life works.

My favorite part comes when I'm treated to five minutes of my Dad and Consular talking to eachother like I'm not in the room, on effective ways to make me see "It" or make me less "Lazy". Of my Dad telling my how dissapointed he is. It's at this point where I realize how detached I've become. My own father is sitting in a room talking about how sad and dissapointed he is that I've become the person I am I don't feel anything more than a slight contempt towards him.

I'm tired. I don't know how to put it any other way. 12 years in the education system has drained me of any sort of motivation to care. It's destroyed my ability to view my Dad with anything resembling what a normal person sees in their own father. There's no respect, no admiration, not even an ounce of good will. I see nothing but I a man I'm forced to endure simply because I'm dependant on him. I sometimes find myself wishing I wasn't who I am, wishing I could just see what "It" was, wishing I could be happy just doing what I'm told.

This isn't a cry for help, most of my life brings me an abudent amount of joy. I'm looking forward to my life after High School where I can pursue the career I want (Computer Networking) and my girlfriend/Best Friend of 2 years has always found ways to keep me happy when everything else fails. Nor is it a declaration of some sort of cause. I don't really see most people agreeing with me or changing the school system in the short time I'm still here. This is just me being me, a reminder to myself later in life of who I was at the time and a way to blow off steam.

Your GPA is important because if you're not willing to apply yourself (It sounds like you're not) then you're not a good investment, no matter how smart you. 

On the plus side, once you're in college high school grades don't matter anymore, they want to see your college grades.

[Jack_Bread]

DnD wiki is all screwy and there is I can find nothing in my house that is ready-to-at. D:

[Akigagak]

There's a DnD wiki? Of course there is, there's probably a cake-making wiki somewhere.

I just use the SRD.

[Gunner-Chan]

Steam support is being bullshit. Why tell me I can give billing information when they're just going to say I need photos of my CD keys? WHICH I DON'T HAVE THE ABILITY TO PROVIDE. I LOST THE CASES A LONG TIME AGO.

This is such bullshit.

[ToonyMan]

All my steam friends just went away, hopefully they come back in a little bit.

Steam...

[Armok]

the world is becoming a little bit clearer.

Stop! Stop now! It isn't worth it!

I am sad today because the cosmic horrors are going to devour everything, nothing, and everything else...

>_________>

Yes, yes it is worth it.  If I work hard enough, I'll be able to get everything I ever wanted.  So I'm working.

Oh... It's worth it aright. At least if you don't value your humanity. Summoning  Azathoth is always fun.

Edit: huh, all my steam friends are gone to.